Is marriage worth it? (US)

[Melusine]

Lol! Right. You would jump at the chance to save your hide, you are not kidding no one.

Been married to the same gal and only one now for over 30 years. Marriage is great, but a good one takes both wiling to work at it. And if you really love someone, then that is a given.

Well, good for you, and no, if those were the conditions, I would consider death to be the better option. Under no circumstance will I ever remarry.

[Ghostpanther]

Well, good for you, and no, if those were the conditions, I would consider death to be the better option. Under no circumstance will I ever remarry.

Bet you change your mind if you ever meet someone you love and feel they love you just as much and will not smother you as a person.

[The3rdCatalyst]

Bet you change your mind if you ever meet someone you love and feel they love you just as much and will not smother you as a person.

But the financial pressure plus a culture of independence can lead to poo relationships. Frankly the economy is not in a good spot, especially since the Fed decided not to do rate hikes in September. So there is a lot of pressure, and always has been, but divorce rates have not always been so high. It was in the 70's where we saw a spike because of social independence instead of dependence with your loved one.

So sure, we can live in a fairy tale where if we love someone we will live happily ever after, but we live in the real world. Just because you love someone now does not mean you always will because of the economy and culture we live in which puts a focus on independence on the slight amount of problem.

[Kathandira]

Marriage is for those mature enough to be married. It is the norm these days for young adults to finish school around 22 - 23 years old. In the past, it was pretty normal for people to get married around this time, since they had been out of school for 4-5 years, and have been developing life skills and were more mentally prepared for such a commitment. Today, since young adults haven't had those years of experience (generally) they are still too young for the responsibility of marriage in their early to mid 20's. I really feel this is why many young marriages quickly end in divorce.

I was a little wiser. I came from a broken home of two parents who got dated in highschool, had a child in their teens, and were married by 20 years old, I was born a few short years later. The marriage was over in 7 years. I had sat and watched the relationship deteriorate, and all of the pain and suffering that came from the divorce. Since I had this insight, I made it a point not to get married until I had been with the person for many years first, live together for a few years, and not have children till a while after marriage. I want to be as cautious as possible to ensure that the decision to marry is a well informed one.

[Karaoke]

But the financial pressure plus a culture of independence can lead to poo relationships. Frankly the economy is not in a good spot, especially since the Fed decided not to do rate hikes in September. So there is a lot of pressure, and always has been, but divorce rates have not always been so high. It was in the 70's where we saw a spike because of social independence instead of dependence with your loved one.

So sure, we can live in a fairy tale where if we love someone we will live happily ever after, but we live in the real world. Just because you love someone now does not mean you always will because of the economy and culture we live in which puts a focus on independence on the slight amount of problem.

You mention economy and culture. If those two things worry you so much, look for someone ambitious and intelligent. Someone who believes in marriage and commitment.

Just because those issues exist, doesn't mean you can't find someone who doesn't fall into that category. Most people don't so it's probably not going to be easy, but it is possible.

[Kaganfindel]

What's your point? Are you arguing for the abolition of the institution because you don't think it's worth the effort? Are you trying to decide if it's a good idea for you or not?