What is point of having a relationship if it is common to cheat on eachother nowadays

[Gimlix]

It is so common to cheat nowadays. You hear couple say it more and more, how hard it is to stick long togheter.
Even here in holland at carnaval, it was proven 20% of the couples cheat during carnaval alone.

Like what the fuck?

Are human beings monsters? What makes you wanna cheat, 1 night of fun to destroy the thing you worked so hard for?

[Gheld]

I think the issue is that we as a society have to reflect upon the thing we call monogamy and whether or not it actually serves us as a standard position in relationships.

Is somebody having sex with somebody else really the worst thing that can happen?

[Socialhealer]

Is somebody having sex with somebody else really the worst thing that can happen?

it's the betrayal of trust, once you can't trust someone how do you have a healthy relationship with them?

[Gimlix]

I think the issue is that we as a society have to reflect upon the thing we call monogamy and whether or not it actually serves us as a standard position in relationships.

Is somebody having sex with somebody else really the worst thing that can happen?

Sorry but, sex is the only thing that makes a relationship different then a friendship, giving sex away even when your married or as a couple, then it shows, that marriage/couple means nothing to you. If you think it's normal, then damn.

[Kathandira]

It is so common to cheat nowadays. You hear couple say it more and more, how hard it is to stick long togheter.
Even here in holland at carnaval, it was proven 20% of the couples cheat during carnaval alone.

Like what the fuck?

Are human beings monsters? What makes you wanna cheat, 1 night of fun to destroy the thing you worked so hard for?

Statistics on cheating would be hard to believe, as liars will simply just lie. But in my personal experience, cheating isn't as common. However, I roll with people who have strong communication skills. If they are poly, then they make that known. If they are monogamist, then they let that be known. With the people I surround myself with, there is little distrust.

[Kathandira]

Sorry but, sex is the only thing that makes a relationship different then a friendship, giving sex away even when your married or as a couple, then it shows, that marriage/couple means nothing to you. If you think it's normal, then damn.

I disagree. My girl friend and I enjoy many things together aside from sex, that I would not be sharing with my friends.

How do you think asexual people enjoy marriage?

[Beazy]

I don't think its common.
Maybe if you're an idiot and get married at the age of 25 its common.
Once you get a little older, your penis begins to lose its power over your mind and you can easily control yourself.

[docterfreeze]

The chance that it could be "the one" I suppose.

[Gimlix]

20% isn't what I'd call common. It's too common for something ridiculous like cheating, but it's not common. And if someone cheats on you that's a sign you may not be right for each other. It's not the end of the world, you simply move on from the relationship.

Cheating no matter how it starts or how it ends, is not something normal.
if you don't like eachother then say it to eachother, there is a big chance 1 of the 2 still love the other very much.
Cheating will make their heart break, It's not always about the person who doesn't feel it anymore.

It should not be normal to cheat. Atleast not how i been grown up as.

[RapBreon]

Sorry but, sex is the only thing that makes a relationship different then a friendship, giving sex away even when your married or as a couple, then it shows, that marriage/couple means nothing to you. If you think it's normal, then damn.

Noooooooooooope. Well it shouldn't be, if that's what you're constructing your lasting relationships on, ya gun be unhappy.

[Gheld]

it's the betrayal of trust, once you can't trust someone how do you have a healthy relationship with them?

If your first order of a relationship is to ask somebody to restrict themselves how do you have a healthy relationship with them?

I mean, I get jealousy.. I really do. I've been cheated on, and it stung like a motherfucking bee. And yet, when she was done lying, and said, "okay guys, let's do this." my heart was like "LEEROOOOOOOOOOY JENKINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1"

It wasn't being cheated on that sucked. It was being lied to. There's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to try a monogamous relationship with somebody. But the fact is cheating is a lot more common than anybody is willing to admit. We're all sexy people in a world full of sexy people. It just seems like a piss poor default position. "I allegedly love you and want to do great things with you, but if you make this one mistake it's over". Fuck that. I mean honestly. If a partner came up to me and was like "I made a mistake.. I had sex with somebody else.. and I'm sorry, and I want to make this work". That would make me more happy than sad.

Honesty is more important than faith in a relationship. I'd rather have a cheaty, dysfunctional honest relationship than a beautiful lie that explodes in my face one day.

[Kathandira]

I don't think its common.
Maybe if you're an idiot and get married at the age of 25 its common.
Once you get a little older, your penis begins to lose its power over your mind and you can easily control yourself.

Agreed. Once your hormones are in balance, it is easier to be more rational about relationships.

If when you are with someone, if Sex is the #1 thing holding you together, you haven't matured enough to understand love.

[ItachiZaku]

Similarly, I hate non-commital people, who are very clearly in a relationship, like anyone who knows them would say that yes, they are together, yet they won't label themselves as BF/GF, so that they can randomly hook up without consequences.

[Gimlix]

Noooooooooooope. Well it shouldn't be, if that's what you're constructing your lasting relationships on, ya gun be unhappy.

Welp, Of course there are many things that makes a relationship a relationship, but sex is something you don't do with someone that isn't your lover. (unless your single)

[Kathandira]

If your first order of a relationship is to ask somebody to restrict themselves how do you have a healthy relationship with them?

I mean, I get jealousy.. I really do. I've been cheated on, and it stung like a motherfucking bee. And yet, when she was done lying, and said, "okay guys, let's do this." my heart was like "LEEROOOOOOOOOOY JENKINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1"

It wasn't being cheated on that sucked. It was being lied to. There's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to try a monogamous relationship with somebody. But the fact is cheating is a lot more common than anybody is willing to admit. We're all sexy people in a world full of sexy people. It just seems like a piss poor default position. "I allegedly love you and want to do great things with you, but if you make this one mistake it's over". Fuck that. I mean honestly. If a partner came up to me and was like "I made a mistake.. I had sex with somebody else.. and I'm sorry, and I want to make this work". That would make me more happy than sad.

Honesty is more important than faith in a relationship. I'd rather have a cheaty, dysfunctional honest relationship than a beautiful lie that explodes in my face one day.

Very well said. Relationships take work, and understanding, and compromise. Letting one mistake ruin it all, means you weren't willing to make it work from the start.

[RapBreon]

Welp, Of course there are many things that makes a relationship a relationship, but sex is something you don't do with someone that isn't your lover. (unless your single)

Depends entirely on the boundaries agreed upon. I've heard of very successful 'open ended marriages'.

I think a major part of the problem is people are raised to be monogamous, but don't want to be monogamous; whether they ever figure that out about themselves is another question.

[Independent voter]

I don't think cheating is all that common. Maybe during the stage the relationship is falling apart but it's over then anyways.

[Kathandira]

Welp, Of course there are many things that makes a relationship a relationship, but sex is something you don't do with someone that isn't your lover. (unless your single)

Depends on the pre-set expectations. But that is the key, you have to set expectations right from the start. You can't expect someone to treat you the way you want to be treated, if you don't express the way you wish to be treated from the start.

[Kraenen]

I think the issue is that we as a society have to reflect upon the thing we call monogamy and whether or not it actually serves us as a standard position in relationships.

Is somebody having sex with somebody else really the worst thing that can happen?

Within an exclusive, monogamous relationship sex is pretty important to share with each other and no one else (unless agreed upon). To some people sex is just exchanging orgasms like a business deal or some shit. To others it's a deeply intimate and almost spiritual experience which they want to devote to one other person their whole life.

[Sierra85]

if you are cheating on your partner in a relationship then you are a scum bag. by having sex with others you are breaking that TRUST and the relationship will be doomed to die.