Why don't many parents just abandon rebellious teenagers?

[May90]

How do you measure success or failure? I mean children raised by the old ways created civilizations, while the new ways (starting from the WWII) created failures and millienials.

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And how are kids coming up these days? Its not like we have not applied your ways of raising kids for a long time. It only produced losers and millienials and liberals.

Perhaps not everything is so bad, if you drop the edgelordy attitude a bit.

[Gaidax]

It's natural thing, it's a part of growing up and realizing parents aren't the gods they seem like when you are 4 years old, however most come around later on, when they realize that parents are the only people in the world that you can guarantee not going to fuck you up one way or another, unlike love interests, friends or strangers.

[Ycarene]

You say all of this as if you've never interacted with a young child before. My nephew is about 2 and a half years old, and his parents don't spank him, and every time he is told to do something he doesn't like he cries or screams or just ignores what he is told. Doesn't matter if his parents give him the practical reasoning behind it. It's not that they don't understand speech like you strawmanned, but rather than they don't care about reason or logic. They care about avoiding what they don't like and getting what they do like, and that is pretty much it. Children become spoiled when they are taught that if they misbehave then their parents will have to offer them something good to get them to behave. That causes them to misbehave more. If they are consistently disciplined, then they don't misbehave as often. Sure, you can try time out, but that isn't going to work for long before they realize that they don't need to listen because all you will ever do is tell them to go back to time out. Taking away toys or other privileges also goes over like a lead balloon. Better yet they later forget about those toys being taken away and will throw fits yet again after asking for them and you tell them that you took it away.



So you would then suggest that parents just let their kids do whatever they want whenever they want, because disciplining them just encourages them to hide things and lie?

You're assuming that there are only two option, spank, or let run wild. You can institute discipline without resorting to physical violence. Take away toys and priviledges, time out DOES work, and reward GOOD behavior.

[kingj56]

now granted it is a thing that happens more often than I might believe, but for those that don't, why the fuck not? I find it enraging when a teen has the audacity to show defiance or disrespect toward parents that keep him/her alive. In a world where now kicking the fucking ass of such teens is going to stir a lot of trouble, why not just kick their ass out of the house or disown them? By that age they're independant enough, so if they show no respect, just let them live on their own.

Kids, and i want clarify, KIDS! Cant be on their own. No job no place to stay, it spells hey pick up life of crime. Thats what kids on their own turn to. Kids have ALWAYS been rebellious and beating them just makes them not want to get caught doing the same shit again (In my case and many others case). Also the reason they rebel is cause they dont know better. Cause they are KIDS. Just take away all their shit and embarass the fuck out of them. Thats what i would do.

[cFortyfive]

Seriously, get help.

Looking for professional help seems like the only sensible choice here.

[Mirishka]

Beating kids was never a good way to enforce discipline. You can read current studies on parenting methods and their efficacies if you want, you sound like you have no idea what the hell you're talking about.

Look who created the topic. Of course he has no idea what the hell he is talking about.

[draganid]

because most rebellious teens grow out of it

[Deleted]

Ofcourse there is some level of personality / hereditary mental difficulties but at the end of the day in 99.9% of the cases a rebellious teen lacks good parenting or is having a bad day (who doesn't have those).

It mostly comes down to parenting, which as an observer seems like the single hardest job that spans the breadth of years.