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  1. #1

    Things TV shows have taught you over the years

    Seinfeld: For a short stocky bald dude, George sure gets laid a lot.

    How I Met Your Mother: You have to tell your progeny a ten year old story so you can mack on their aunt.

    Dexter:


  2. #2
    Elemental Lord Sierra85's Avatar
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    Ancient Aliens : that ancient alien theorists basically believe everything.

    The Walking Dead : if the zombie apocalypse happens, get a cross bow.

    Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares : don't eat at restaurants
    Hi

  3. #3
    Herald of the Titans Aoyi's Avatar
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    Game of Thrones: if someone else nominates you for a promotion, DO NOT ACCEPT.

  4. #4
    Titan Sorrior's Avatar
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    Beast Wars: Do not ask someone to do something you would not be willing to do yourself

  5. #5
    Game of Thrones: When you are invited to a wedding, make sure that the people hosting it are not secretly allies of the ones you were trying to kill

    Game of Thrones: Always feed your dogs...

    South Park: They basically warn me about bad movies when they fully spoof some episodes around it, like that zombie movie with Brad Pitt.

    The Walking Dead: Just kill yourself the moment the apocalypse start, nothing good will come for a LONG time for anyone. If it'll ever come good at all. Also getting yourself into a coma is apparently a good way to survive.

  6. #6
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    Star Trek: Don't wear red, or be the only one wearing red.

  7. #7
    Watch out for quicksand.
    Test your self, before someone else tests you.

  8. #8
    Dreadlord Hawthorne Wipes's Avatar
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    Murder, She Wrote: that new famous actor from the starting credits, that's the murderer.
    "You can wear whatever costume you want for Halloween and it's totally cool but here's a list of costumes I'll shame you for and call you sexist and racist if you do wear them"
    - Laci Green 2015.

  9. #9
    As far as Walking Dead goes, I think I'd try to keep a mix of weapon types within reach at all times. Each one kind of has its benefits and weaknesses.

    Gun = effective, and ammo is seemingly not difficult to come by for Rick and Co. (especially if you have a smart dude like Eugene around who can figure out how to make more). They'd also be more effective against living bad guys. But guns are loud. A single shot could potentially draw a swarm of walkers to your position. So you kinda have to decide if it's worth that risk.

    Crossbow = effective and silent, but...I imagine it'd be a bit more difficult to wield. I've never fired a crossbow in real life, so I can't say much about them from experience.

    Knife/sword/hammer = effective, silent, and doesn't require ammo, but requires you to be in melee reach, which could make you more vulnerable if there are multiple walkers

    All 3 are pretty effective but will work better in one situation or the other. I'd probably go with keeping both a good melee weapon and a good pistol within quick/easy reach at all times.

    Also: Considering how many characters have died because of dumb things they did, Walking Dead has taught me a lot of things NOT to do if the zombie apocalypse ever happens. For example, I won't attempt using a pair of tiny scissors to stab a crazy chick who has a gun.
    Last edited by Ciddy; 2016-07-10 at 05:01 PM.

  10. #10
    That most americans are dumb.
    That gay people are naive as fook.
    That you cant see 2 far from your own nose and your own agenda aka human nature and people in general are stupid animals that are egoistical and maniacal murderers.

    What else.
    Yes do not eat at fishy places ty mr Ramsey.
    That most talent shows are won by none talented people.
    Hate crimes are every day thing doesn't matter if its vs blacks/muslims/whites/asians its just a way of life.

    Over all television has been educational "NOT".

  11. #11
    How I met your Mother taught me that life is "LEGEN" wait for it......"DARY!"

    Dragonball Z taught me that if I scream at the top of my lungs I will become a Super Arayan, and beat the shit out of everyone.

    24 taught me that even the most sophisticated international incident can be resolved in a day, half a day if you've been doing it for 10 years.

  12. #12
    Firefly: The Chinese are going to take over human civilization. Makes sense.

    Grey's Anatomy: Doctors and nurses have to have those 24 hour shifts because they spend half of them fucking.

    The Sopranos: That mafia men are sensitive, misunderstood, cuddly guys, who just, yanno, want to feed their families.

    Breaking Bad: Making meth and creating a huge criminal enterprise is better than borrowing money from a former business partner.

    The Walking Dead: I'd probably be killed by a human before I'd be killed by a zombie, since I'm not dumb, but I am trusting (like a Herschel).

    Game of Thrones: White people be trippin'. Everything's breezy on the Summer Isles, breh.

    Friends: An apartment in Manhattan is affordable on a coffehouse waitress's salary.

  13. #13
    Law and Order: Theatricality is part of criminal court room proceedings.
    any (modern) anime: gratuitous underwear shots is perfectly normal, and so are gigantic mechs.
    Castle: Being a Mystery Writer is the same as being a detective and you'll get to work with actual cops when investigating a crime.
    NCIS: It's OK to slap your employees upside the head when they're being a dumbass.
    Transformers: "Remember, biology, not metal." quotes Starscream from Transformers Prime in regards to Transformers as a lifeform despite the fact that they are just robots in disguise! (yeah, sorry, couldn't resist)

  14. #14
    Banshee - the amish can be some hardcore mutha fuckas.
    Quote Originally Posted by THE Bigzoman View Post
    Meant Wetback. That's what the guy from Home Depot called it anyway.
    ==================================
    If you say pls because it is shorter than please,
    I'll say no because it is shorter than yes.
    ==================================

  15. #15
    The Unstoppable Force
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    Quote Originally Posted by eschatological View Post
    Firefly: The Chinese are going to take over human civilization. Makes sense.

    Grey's Anatomy: Doctors and nurses have to have those 24 hour shifts because they spend half of them fucking.

    The Sopranos: That mafia men are sensitive, misunderstood, cuddly guys, who just, yanno, want to feed their families.

    Breaking Bad: Making meth and creating a huge criminal enterprise is better than borrowing money from a former business partner.

    The Walking Dead: I'd probably be killed by a human before I'd be killed by a zombie, since I'm not dumb, but I am trusting (like a Herschel).

    Game of Thrones: White people be trippin'. Everything's breezy on the Summer Isles, breh.

    Friends: An apartment in Manhattan is affordable on a coffehouse waitress's salary.
    To be fair, you learn that Monica inherited the apartment from her... Aunt? And that she's been living there rent free due to a legal technicality.

    Amazing sig, done by mighty Lokann

  16. #16
    House: Sick people care more about keeping secrets from their families (and lying to their doctor) than they care about getting healthy.

    Shark Tank: *starts crying to myself* I'll always be poor.

    Mr. Robot: if you trip on acid enough you can become an expert hacker.

    Game of Thrones: it doesn't matter how hard you try, all that matters is that you were born into a rich family.

    Better Call Saul: The majority of people have disfunctional families.

    -----

    I don't actually watch too many TV shows so I can't think of any more to do.

  17. #17
    From Forensic Files and various other shows on ID, CourtTV, etc:Don't commit a murder, cause 99% of the time, you're going to jail, even if it's 15 years down the road.
    Last edited by Stormcall; 2016-07-11 at 01:23 PM.

  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Mokoshne View Post
    Ancient Aliens : that ancient alien theorists basically believe everything.

    The Walking Dead : if the zombie apocalypse happens, get a cross bow.

    Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares : don't eat at restaurants
    It should have taught you the importance of making good decisions.............since no character on the show seems to have that ability.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Aoyi View Post
    Game of Thrones: if someone else nominates you for a promotion, DO NOT ACCEPT.
    Game of Thrones: If someone tells you "We'll talk about it when I return".......make them talk about it now because they are going to die.
    Me thinks Chromie has a whole lot of splaining to do!

  19. #19
    Deleted
    English

    /englishchar

  20. #20
    Stealthed Defender unbound's Avatar
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    Dumpsters are always filled with soft trash to cushion the fall.

    Bad guys have terrible aim.

    Cops only arrest bad guys with 100% accuracy rate, so it is good that they beat arrested people up to get that info.

    We are always just moments away from something horrible happening that kill many, many people unless we get that info from that one individual right now.

    This week's sporting event is the biggest and best one ever.

    Explosions mostly just blow up buildings but rarely hurt people.

    Restaurants always have that same table available for you every time you visit.

    Big guys almost always have hot wives / girlfriends.

    Flashlights illuminate a room just as well as turning on the lights.

    Guns only run out of ammo at exactly the wrong time.

    Cars can easily jump up 20 feet or so with a simple mound of dirt or small ramp.

    Groceries are only sold in paper bags and always include leafy greens and french bread.

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