What would be the worst date ever in valentines day?

[Virtuoz0]

What would be the worst date ever in valentines day?

[DaHomieG]

Not ending up fucking or at least getting a handjob lmao

[Deleted]

Not ending up fucking or at least getting a handjob lmao

So sex is the only thing that matters? Really?

[Splenda]

Going out to a really crappy, dirty diner, getting food poisoning, then getting dumped right after and kicked out of the car before getting home.

Too specific?

[Mechazod]

Getting stabbed in the face.

[Sorshen]

Being pressured into having a date on valentines day cause that's "what you do", or " there's no better time to take a chance/show your affection" or shit like that.

[DaHomieG]

So sex is the only thing that matters? Really?

Yes .

[6k MMR Lolicon]

Going the entire evening without watching a single good horror movie.

Alternatively, having my date mysteriously fall off the balcony of my appartment, and having to tell the whole world about it.

[Radaney]

Yes .

I think I've seen Dog Paddling Pools less shallow.

[DaHomieG]

I think I've seen Dog Paddling Pools less shallow.

[Jotaux]

Going out to a really crappy, dirty diner, getting food poisoning, then getting dumped right after and kicked out of the car before getting home.

Too specific?

...Did that happen to you?

[breadisfunny]

a date with a draenei.

[YourExWife]

Why, if I were to be put in a situation where I had to take a bullet, of course. A Bullet... for my valentine.

Taking a beautiful lady out on a date.
Spending time with that lady, getting to know her personally and her most intimate thoughts and feelings, and feeling nothing but utter love and adoration in return.
You feel needed, wanted, and desired, and it is reciprocated. After a wonderful meal, you go back to her place, and she makes you coffee, and you sit and chat for an hour or so, until she invites you to the bedroom.

She proceeds to give you the most sensual massage of your life, and as you relax, she asks if she can make sweet, sweet love to you, and you agree. Gently, she handcuffs you to the bed, binding you softly so you cannot move, all the while touching you with gentle kisses, and caressing you every moment. You're in Heaven.



At that point, her boyfriend dressed in a Batman suit comes rushing out, takes a dump on your chest, before proceeding to bang her on top of you, smearing poop everywhere, whilst staring into your eyes all the while before finishing off onto your face whilst shouting "WHO WANTS SALT AND VINEGAR?".

Ten out of ten, sir.

Ten. Out. Of. Ten.

[Splenda]

...Did that happen to you?

You'll never know ;P

[Pony Soldier]

Getting stood up and never hearing from the person again. I'd feel like absolute shit if that happened to me. Thankfully I have everyday experience with feeling like shit so at least it won't break me.

[Powerogue]

Probably this. I've tried three times now and it's always ended up with either death or violent probing.

[Arteis]

Laying on the floor drunk, yelling Adele lyrics at my cat.

On a more serious note, my worst was probably when I walked through a foot of snow, while it was still working on dumping another foot, to the flower shop. Bought 30$ worth of roses, walked a mile to her house, and got broken up with and kicked out by noon because she "fell in love with another guy"

[May90]

February 14th!

[Champagne Supernova]

My girlfriend didn't appreciate this. Alas, a joke of course.