Ah I see. Sometimes it can be hard to hear information about ourselves that make us feel extremely vulnerable, which is why some people cannot handle criticism even when it's for their benefit from close friends. The fact that you are aware of your condition, your reasoning, and especially that the diagnosis was hard to hear means that you are showing a lot of insight and introspection, which is awesome and healthy.
I have to head to work but if you want to vent without sharing personal information I'll be more than happy to hear you out as I have had my fair share of personal struggles with mental health. PM me and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. In the meantime I sincerely hope you feel better and remember that there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of from your diagnosis.
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It's the not-racist butt .