Vanasza

[Deleted]

Name: Vanazsa
Age: 320
Race: Flamewaker
Gender: Male
Class: Warrior
Personality: Vanasza has a very friendly approach, but is easily angered. He has a short temper because of the things that has happened throughout his life, and is still not comfortable with living around the Horde.
Likes/Dislikes: Vanasza adores the nature, and living things. He enjoys hand-to-hand combat, and planning strategies and tactics. He's not very fond of magicians, although he approves of Warlocks. He has a natural hate against Humans and all kinds of elves.
Voice: His voice is much like a naga, which is rattling. The voice also has a very deep rumbling in it, as if a greater being was speaking inside of him.
Appearance: 8 feet tall, weighs 270 pounds, dark red skin. Spikes is covering his body, ranging from 1-3 feet. Generally the looks of a naga, but imbued with the element of Fire. ((Referring to flamewalkers at WoWWiki))
Strengths/Weaknesses: Strong tactician, very strong in hand-to-hand combat, although mentally weak. He has a friendly approach, but is also easily angered.
History:
Once a servant of the Fire Lord, Ragnaros, Vanazsa managed to break free from his brethren's grasp, with the help of a Forsaken Warlock.
He was a rear entrance guard, currently alone on his watch. He had watched many foes go against Ragnaros, only to fall before his might. He had also seen many of his fellow Flamewakers approach Ragnaros, some only to ask him for guidance, and those too were slain. Vanasza didn't want to end up like this. He had a strong will, but not strong enough to free him from his chains of the Fire Lord.
He had seen many friends fall before the wrath of Ragnaros. He was afraid it was gonna be him someday. But one day, a warlock showed up, only with his little Imp at his side.
Vanasza grabbed his trident, and got ready for battle.

The warlock approached him without a look of fear on his face, and told him "I can break you free from this curse. The curse of Ragnaros lies upon you, and keeps you chained to his will. I can help you get out of it, if you accept to help me afterwards." Not quite knowing whether this was true or not, Vanasza accepted the help. The warlock summoned some more warlocks from a hidden cult. The warlocks began surrounding me. They were 5 in total, and Vanasza was starting to get a little scared. They all summoned their imps, except the one that approached him at first. He dismissed his imp, and called out his Felstalker. The little demonic dog was looking at Vanasza with hungry eyes; eyes that lusted for elemental powers.
The warlocks raised their hands, and a circle of runes appeared around him. He started to feel drained from his energy, all of his thoughts and strength slowly disappearing from his body. The cultists began mumbling in a strange language. A language that seemed familiar from some of the demonic entities also inhabitating this place.
Suddenly, he fell to the floor. He wanted to scream, because a massive pain rushed through his body, but he couldn't say a word. It seems like one of the warlocks had cast the Curse of Tongues on him. It kept swirling around on his inside, his veins filled with nothing but pain.
He tried to look at the warlocks, and his surroundings, but his vision was getting blurry. He got confused, and started panicing, but to no help. The warlocks had bound him, he was unable to move. He looked at the Felstalker, and thinks he saw a smile on its lips. He closed his eyes, and everything went dark.

He woke up in a small chamber. The only way he could look out of the chamber, was a small hole in the door. He measured the room to be about 3 square meters. It was dark, and the only light also came from the hole in the door.
He slowly stepped towards it, and looked out. He immediately paniced, as he saw Orcs and Undeads surrounding the chamber. All covered in purple, dark red and black robes with hoods, he thought they were going to torment him. He stepped back in the chamber, and reached to his belt, to grab his trident. It wasn't there. He looked around for an exit, but he couldn't see any, except from the one that had warlocks outside of it.

The door opened, and the warlock that had approached him in the fiery depths, came towards him. "Are you awake?" he asked. "Yes I am. What do you want with me?" Vanasza asked him, with fear in his voice. The warlock looked at him "Come with me, Flamewaker." his voice had changed to a more sincere tone, making Vanasza feel more comfortable.
They stepped out of the chamber, and he saw a big room, with guards in it. The warlocks had retreated, but the guards were heavily armed, and standing ready to charge. They were covered in black and gold plated armor, with big axes in their hands. He looked up, and saw a great Orc stand before him, in front of a throne.
The orc approached Vanasza, and wanted to shake his hand. "I am Thrall, Warchief of the Horde. I hear that Winston has unbound you from the chains that Ragnaros placed upon you." Vanasza was frightened by this approach. He was not used to friendliness, but he slowly shook Thrall's hand. "That is true," he said, with a small scent of fear in his voice. "But what can I possibly do for you? I'm an exile now, an outcast of the Servants of Ragnaros." Thrall looked at him, and grinned slighty. "You can help us defeat him. You know what he does, what tactics he used and what spells he can cast. You, Flamewaker, can help us get a better future." Vanasza was scared, but yet relieved. "Will you help us, Flamewaker?" Vanasza looked at Thrall, then around at the guards, and lastly at Winston. Winston still had the Felstalker at his side, looking hungrily at Vanasza. "I will, Thrall. I will help you. But you must try and save as many of my brethren as possibly. I beg you." Thrall looked at him with a slight look of disgust in his eyes. He then smiled briefly, and said "We will try our best." he said, and handed over a necklace with the symbol of fire on it. "What is this?" Vanasza asked him, slightly confused. "A necklace imbued with the element of Fire. Without that, your body will burn out, and you'll vanish. Keep this on at all time, and you will live your full life." Vanasza took a hold of the necklace, and immediately felt the power surging through his body. His strength and spirit returned to him, and he looked at Thrall. "Thank you, Thrall. This will not be forgotten." Thrall smiled, and asked him "What is your name, Flamewaker?". "My name is Vanasza."

[Golden Deagle]

How does the the events of his live give him a short temper? Why does he adore nature and why hate humans and elves, but no the other races? If he's mentally weak, why does it mention later in the bio that he has a strong will? Why would a random horde warlock capture a Flamewalker and bring it back to Orgrimmar to serve Thrall? Why would the Flamewalker want to serve Thrall? A few questions, and there are many more things wrong with it.

I think you went about the wrong way making a Flamewalker. You've written him just like hes a normal elf or human or something, no insight to his character within the history. It's also not very realistic or canon with the lore, let alone canon with itself at some points. Try read up more on lore of the Elementals and their servants, previous wars, that kind of thing. Also relations with races like Flamewalkers and such with the rest of the Horde/Alliance.

This should help you get the bio right.