Uh, since Lobo didn't make a wish, reboot!
I wish I was a billionaire with an amazing social life.
Granted, but every time you force yourself to sleep you have a nightmare where the sanctity of your body is violated by Morgan Freeman.
I wish I had a roommate that likes the same things that I do.
Granted its a male,and because you love yourself,he loves you too,daily and nightly and every so rightly!
I wish deja vu wasnt so deja vu-ey!
Granted, but the sound is so loud, you lose your ability to hear.
I wish I wasn't hungry.
Granted. He makes loads of them, each exactly the same as the very one you posted. Same song, same everything, many many videos.
I wish I had the ability to mimic any singer's voice perfectly on demand, including how high/low/ they can sing and growl/falsetto.
Granted, but somebody kills you for being so awesome.
I wish I could teleport.
Granted, but then all your fingers fall off and you can never do another assignment again, thus failing.
I wish I was a mind reader
Granted, but you can only read minds of disgustingly fat and ugly people, who think about masturbating.
I wish for a genie which grants you corrupted wishes.
Granted. But he's from a parallel universe where the wishes you think are corrupted are infact not corrupted and vice versa, thus making the genie the opposit of what you wished for.
I wish for this thread to end, right now.
Granted, but you can't find any colleges that will accept them.
I wish that it could snow no matter what the temperature was, and only melted after three days.
Granted. You are now relocated to Antarctica where your wish is a reality. (It's as bad of a place as you think. Penguin gang violence has escalated in the past few years.)
I wish I knew the knowledge in my textbook without having to read it.