Myself - mortal enemy of Harry Potter - Call me Riddle, Tom Riddle.
Older Brother - Sword Fight with Kirby.
Big little brother - Best Friends with - Harry Potter. So, he is Ron Weasley? An ally of my nemesis? I can handle it.
My Best Friend - Best friends with - Lord Voldemort. I suppose this is convenient.
Girlfriend - Trapped in Prison with - Edward Cullen. Oh, she will NOT like that at all, being as she hates everything about Twilight.
Other awesome friend - must replace the Human Population with Lady Gaga, I am fairly sure that he would rather die.