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  1. #1
    Dreadlord Tuuralihn's Avatar
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    Getting a child - Im afraid

    So, rather serious topic. But, even though I know alot fo you will troll this, you guys and gals are the people I know got mroe brains than
    the rest of the populations. (all the math into rotations, calculating how much hit to get capped and so on and so on.)

    My girlfriend wants to have a baby sometime in the future.
    But, Im afraid. Afraid of dropping the kid on the head whilst hes a baby.
    Afraid I'll screw him up.
    Afraid of being a bad dad.

    Someone, help me, turn me around, somehow!


    Edit:

    Thank you everyone. Especially the first post and all the agreements with that post. You've made my heart and nerves
    at ease. Maybe it's the alcohol speaking, but, I love you guys ^^
    Last edited by Tuuralihn; 2011-02-12 at 11:34 PM.
    I am and always will be the optimist. The hope for far-flung hopes and dreamer of improbable dreams.

  2. #2
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.

  3. #3
    Every parent fears "dropping" the baby, it's a natural instinct to take care and nuture the child, and is a positive sign you're not a child abusing psychopath. Most fathers (in my experience) adapt very quickly to parenthood and quickly learn how to cope with a child. Use your fear and over come it, don't let it rule your life.

  4. #4
    Dreadlord Tuuralihn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunmist View Post
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.
    One comment and I already feel better. Thanks!
    I am and always will be the optimist. The hope for far-flung hopes and dreamer of improbable dreams.

  5. #5
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.
    That covers a lot of it. If you actually are afraid you are going to "get it wrong", you probably aren't. You actually, and truly, care about your future child, and that's what matters (and a tight grip :P)
    It's not just me, it's ALL rets. Join the ret MS club, get bitches, get money, get nerfed.
    It takes idiots to do cool things. That's why they are cool.

  6. #6
    Fluffy Kitten eternalwhitemoon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunmist View Post
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.
    This is 100% full of nothing but truth. Don't fear, everyone (who's reasonable) is worried about causing accidental harm to their child. It's natural, and a sign that you only want what's best for him.

  7. #7
    Bloodsail Admiral Syntic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunmist View Post
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.
    That is so, so true.

    You care, thats enough reason from the start to know that you're more than likely going to be a good dad.
    I'd do anything for a smile, holding you 'til our time is done.

  8. #8
    Blademaster junioroverlord's Avatar
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    Babies are made to withstand our parenting. Raising children is the thing we have evolved to do, it's our most primal instinct. You'll be fine.
    "Everyone generalizes from one example, I know I do" Steven Brust

  9. #9
    I felt exactly the same way you do now when my girlfriend first got pregnant. I'd had a history of irresponsibility and at times selfishness, no one would have been surprised (least of all me) if I wasn't a good father. Two years since then I can't believe that was the case. When it's your child you'll care about him or her enough that you'll not only do the right thing 99% of the time, but you'll actively want to put yourself out for them. It's hard to put into words without sounding disturbingly clichéd and pathetic, but don't worry about it, you'll be fine.

    Also dropping them on the head happens far, far less than you'll imagine, it's also not the biggest fear you'll have if you read enough baby books.

  10. #10
    well i guess some one has to make a joke and il do it
    reroll a warrior and specc arms for titans grip
    but on the serieus side you'll be fine ^^
    Cryptdefiler level 90 warlock

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Gunmist View Post
    If you're afraid of being a bad dad, odds are you're going to be a good dad.

    A bad dad doesn't worry about being a bad dad.
    That's a great way of putting it. You may not be perfect, and hardly any dads are. Do your best with what you have, everyone will make mistakes parenting. Do your best to try and be fair to yourself and your kid, and don't be too hard on anyone when you realize it isn't entirely possible from everyone's point of view.

  12. #12
    I had all these concerns myself. But let me tell you once you hold your kid, your natural instinct takes over. It will be rough at first, but I wouldn't change anything else about my life after seeing my daughter.

    And what Aerys said, you'll be fine

  13. #13
    Lot of good advice in this thread.

    Just remember to always put the kid above yourself, remember that children often hate their parents no matter what and that's okay and isn't a reflection on you, and never quite stop worrying about being a bad dad (That bit of advice on the second post is great) and chances are, you'll be a far better dad than most.

  14. #14
    Field Marshal Jefar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thecorrupted View Post
    well i guess some one has to make a joke and il do it
    reroll a warrior and specc arms for titans grip
    but on the serieus side you'll be fine ^^
    Arms for Titans grip?
    This is my signature. There are many like it but this one is mine.

  15. #15
    Fear is natural and healthy.
    You are probably gonna do good by that child, your thinking and elaborating how to be a good dad for the child which is good.
    Shitty dads(aka trash) are those who knock someone up and not giving a damn about it and when the child is born they only see them as a nuisance.

    But you are human so there is bound to be mistakes.

    Never put your guard down when handling a child, be very observative of its actions.
    He/she don't know a way of communicating, only the way of instinct.

    Good luck in the future, hope you become a good father.

  16. #16

  17. #17
    I am Murloc! Xuvial's Avatar
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    1) You want to raise a child, but are scared you'll get it wrong as a father.
    2) You don't want to raise a child BECAUSE you're scared you'll get it wrong as a father. But deep down you still want one.
    3) You don't want a child full stop. But your GF insists.

    If it's 1) or 2), you'll be a fine daddy. If it's 3), simply tell your GF you're not ready yet.

  18. #18
    High Overlord Mordaren's Avatar
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    Nice,

    Everything will be fine, you don´t have to worry about that, every dad/mom learn how to be when the baby come, just take it easy everything will be cool. You can´t buy something like "How to be a DAD/MOM for dummies" of course not! You learn to be a good parent learning and paying attention everyday. Calm down. Hold your GF hand all time and make your baby happy that´s all.

    Joke:
    Buy a helmet, kevlar, a biiiig bed, for the baby not for you, this will keep him safe. Maybe an electric suit against you. Alright... this just made me laugh

    ---------- Post added 2011-02-12 at 06:05 PM ----------

    My 17 year cousin, has a 1 year old baby with his GF, they are very responsible, I will get a pic to show you

    Your solo nature means that you're very capable of fending for yourself. It also means, however, that you have trouble finding your place in groups. *Completely true! Do you want to be my friend?*

  19. #19
    Bloodsail Admiral
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tuuralihn View Post
    So, rather serious topic. But, even though I know alot fo you will troll this, you guys and gals are the people I know got mroe brains than
    the rest of the populations. (all the math into rotations, calculating how much hit to get capped and so on and so on.)

    My girlfriend wants to have a baby sometime in the future.
    But, Im afraid. Afraid of dropping the kid on the head whilst hes a baby.
    Afraid I'll screw him up.
    Afraid of being a bad dad.

    Someone, help me, turn me around, somehow!


    Edit:

    Thank you everyone. Especially the first post and all the agreements with that post. You've made my heart and nerves
    at ease. Maybe it's the alcohol speaking, but, I love you guys ^^
    Nobody really has any practice at being a parent (closest you'll get is having siblings), you won't drop the baby I haven't yet and I'm on 5 siblings and counting atm, it's really not as difficult as you'd think even though you are crapping it the first few times :P. Anyways, every single person out there has just winged it when it came to parenthood, your parents hadn't a clue and mine sure as hell didn't, it's all down to the experience of it.
    Skullmaster - Slathe - Duat - Tamriel

    Absolutely everything happens for a reason - Omnia Causa Fiunt.

  20. #20
    have a kid, sure they can be annoying, bleh bleh whatever! but your going to have amazing times with him/her , its a new feeling watching a kid grow up infront of your eyes. theyre just so gosh darn cute @_@
    Quote Originally Posted by Synwyn View Post
    My first raiding guild, way back in Vanilla WoW - Kaywarrior was our DPS warrior. After a billion Nef kills, Ashkandi finally dropped. He jerked off on vent. Literally jerked off while keyed in. Best moment ever.
    Indeed.

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