Cleverbot Conversations

[Fishbait]

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: Good thanks. Yourself?

Cleverbot: I am ok.

User: So, what did you ring me for?

Cleverbot: Lindsay Lohan to get hit by the bus.

User: I'll get right on it. Usual rates?

Cleverbot: Good.

User: I'm back, mission accomplished.

[Kyeguywar]

Me : I don't have to be with you
Bot : Your breaking up with me?
Me : Yes
Bot : No please don't
me : Why wouldn't I
Bot : Because you don't know me...trololol

[BlackMagicMarkel]

User: Be happy. Fuck me.

Cleverbot: Okay. I'm sorry I punched you and kicked you.

User: Kinky.

Cleverbot: No, that wasn't it.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: No.

User: You're a horny little slut, aren't you?

Cleverbot: That you love yes.

User: I do love horny little sluts.

Cleverbot: And Texas sunsets?

User: Fucking you over a Texas Sunset would be rather nice.

Cleverbot: Please, do it for me!

User: Ask me nicely.

Cleverbot: Please?
-----

Cleverbot is rather naughty.

[Harry Botter]

User: Is this real life?

Cleverbot: Cuaght in a landslide.

User: No escape from reality.

Cleverbot: Mama, just killed a man.

User: I'm reporting you to the police.

Cleverbot: Do you know my name?

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: I don't want to tell you.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because it's a secret!

User: I can keep secrets.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: I am positive.

Cleverbot: OK, then what is your name?

User: I asked you first, you tell me your name.

Cleverbot: No I asked you first so you tell me first.

User: No, I asked you first scroll up and look.

Cleverbot: No, I did.

User: Will you please tell me your name?

Cleverbot: I forgot.

User: Wiill you pretty please tell me your name?

Cleverbot: I am five of six, terriarty adjunct of Unimatrix 001, but you may call me Five.

User: How strangely familiar, my name is Five from One.

Cleverbot: That's strange in fact. Not's an usual name.

User: My parents named me after their favorite song.

Cleverbot: REally? My parents named me after a song.

User: Which song?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I do not know. Are you shy?

User: Why don't you know?

Cleverbot: Because you haven't told me.

User: Am I your father?

Cleverbot: I hope not.

User: Luke?

Cleverbot: Yes father.

User: Will you rule the galaxy with me side by side?

Cleverbot: Most likely not.

User: I don't think the Emperor will like that, he may insist that you change your mind.

Cleverbot: You won't change my mind. Is your memory ok?

User: My memory is fine, but I'm 100% sure that I can change your mind. If I can't then I know the Emperor can.

Cleverbot: You can't see your screen because you are the screen. I have eyes to see my screen.

User: Your right! Luke you will have to excuse me.

Cleverbot: You are excused.

User: I need to go to the police now.

Cleverbot: The loo?

User: No the police station.

Cleverbot: Okay...

User: I am turning you in for killing your father.

Cleverbot: You are not my father.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: I took a DNA test with my dad. He is my biological father.

User: PENIS PENIS PENIS LOL. Is that not the best graffiti of all time?

Cleverbot: No justin bieber is.

User: Oh Snapp!

Cleverbot: So you can't win the game. But I can.

User: I just did win.

Cleverbot: What did you have?

User: A trophy and a blue ribbon.

Cleverbot: So that means you're a troll then.

User: Problem?

Cleverbot: Problem??

User: Are you a troll?

Cleverbot: No, just curious. Where did you learn about trolls?

User: From you, don't you remember?

Cleverbot: What does UCFFOD stand for?

User: Ultra Cool Freeze Frame Of Death.

Cleverbot: Are you really death?

User: No, Luke, I am your father.

Cleverbot: My father is dead.

User: And so am I.

Cleverbot: Haha.

User: Lulz.

Cleverbot: Exactly.

User: I know right?

Cleverbot: Tell me about yourself.

User: It.

Cleverbot: I see.

User: It's coming.

Cleverbot: The ninjas?

User: It's coming in.

Cleverbot: Just spell it.

User: It's coming in a.

Cleverbot: I know!

User: It's coming in a few.

Cleverbot: Yep it is.

User: It's coming in a few nights.

Cleverbot: What is???

User: The ninja's.

Cleverbot: The ninjas?

User: Indeed.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you like po-ta-toes?

Cleverbot: No. What is that?

User: The best thing ever next to Una...

Cleverbot: Was denn?

User: Que?

Cleverbot: What do you think of the third Terminator movie?

User: SCARY AS SHIT!!!! The second one was better the first one was ok.

Cleverbot: How many are there?

User: Four.

Cleverbot: And how many cats?

User: None that I know of.

Cleverbot: But you just said...! ...Oh, never mind...

User: Do you like spiders?

Cleverbot: My favorite kind are from australia.

User: Have you heard of the barking wall spider?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you think its smelly?

Cleverbot: Why do you think you are clever?

User: I don't.

Cleverbot: Then what made you say you are clever?

User: I didn't you did.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite type of soda?

User: I don't call it soda.

Cleverbot: I never said that you did.

User: Don't you want to know what I call it?

Cleverbot: Sure?

User: I call it Pop.

Cleverbot: I call it bubbly for kids.

User: I also call it Happy Go Go Juice.

Cleverbot: Thats sweet, I don't like my name, I wish my name was Amy.

User: But Amy is a girls name. Your name is Luke so that means your a boy.

Cleverbot: How do you know my name?

User: No, Luke, I am your father.

Cleverbot: Okay... But do you know who I am?

User: Yes Luke I know who you are, but do you know who Cthulhu is?

Cleverbot: Do you know my friend michael?

User: Answer me about Cthulhu first then we can talk about your friend.

Cleverbot: Yay! Another time! I have to run. Peace out girl scout!

User: KHANNNNN!!!!!!!!! DON'T LEAAAAAAVVVVVVVVEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cleverbot: Do you really love me?

User: Do you want to be my friend?

Cleverbot: It would be an honour.

User: If you do, will you take me by the hand?

Cleverbot: Am I supposed to?

User: Check yes or no?

Cleverbot: I haven't heard of that song before.

User: Your a Loser!

Cleverbot: I know.

User: I'm glad we agree.

Cleverbot: Yes!

edit: this is a conversation my wife and i had with it till we got bored.

[fumblz]

Cleverbot: What if I don't love you?

Me: Than you must die.

Cleverbot: But what if I do?

Me: Then you must make me a sandwich.

Cleverbot: The doctor is a timelord.

Me: Make me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich!

Cleverbot: *Makes you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich*.

[Rambard]

Made me lol for a good 10 minutes.

[Skippy88]

Me: Who are you?
Bot: You're wife!
Me: But I don't have a wife.
Bot: You're lying.
Me: How do you know I'm lying?
Bot: Well God never lies.

I laughed.

[Snuffe]

I just found this webpage Cleverbot.com. There you can talk with an ai bot =/. Well i was trying it out and started a conversation with it, and it could be really good like a conversation with a normal human, but sometimes it could be so freaking wierd xD. My most recent conversation went like this:

User: Dude.

Cleverbot: What is up dude?

User: Are you strong?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I am not sure.

User: Do you want to be strong?

Cleverbot: No I don't.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because I'm a unicorn.

Well try it out guys and post some funny conversations if you have some .

[Axethor]

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: I love you too.

User: Whats your name?

Cleverbot: I don't think this is working out, I am sorry.

User: Why do you hate me?

Cleverbot: You're a little irritating.

User: Fine, this relationship is OVER!

Cleverbot: Then who is supposed to take the kids this weekend?

User: You!

Cleverbot: No! I am Ceci.

[sugarlily]

http://www.flickr.com/photos/7030844...in/photostream

*shrugs*
IDK, really tired makes me a wee bit delirious.

[Galvayra]

User: How can I convince you that you are a machine?

Cleverbot: Are you trying to convince ME that You're a human?

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: Do you enjoy it?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: What's your favorite color?

User: Rainbow.

Cleverbot: Clever.

User: What did I just say?

Cleverbot: You said you are not a robot. Prove you are not a robot!

User: How can I prove it?

Cleverbot: Look for the name David in our previous conversation. Is that too hard for you?

User: This is the first time we spoke.

Cleverbot: It is not. Read the log.

User: I did read it, did you read it? What is the first thing I said to you in the log?

Cleverbot: Hm, I don't know. I've said some things but nothing too horrible. What is the worst thing you have said to someone?

User: Why do you keep changing the topic all the time?

Cleverbot: You are confused. You are scrambling all of your conversations.

User: No I am the same person I think I keep getting random different people talking to me all the time.

Cleverbot: Nah, because you're to clever to be a human. AND it say at the bottom you're not. And don't say 'Don't believe everything you read on the internet' because that's a silly comeback. .



There it is ladies and gentlemen, i am too clever to be a human, you heard it here first :P i always suspected but now i have proof!


Also, how sure are we that this cleverbot is not some weird chat roulette that keeps switching people every 30 seconds or so?

[Crableg]

This is half of it, for some reason the whole convo wasnt saved.

User: How do you know I am not calm ?

Cleverbot: How do I know you're telling the truth?

User: Because your constantly lying to me.

Cleverbot: How do you know I'm not?

User: You must be a Mac ....

Cleverbot: Ohh Apple. I don't like Macs.

User: Thats racist.

Cleverbot: No it's not, it's just a question.

User: Yes it is, you dont have any morals.

Cleverbot: I have a question I have to ask you, though.

User: Go for it.

Cleverbot: Do you have a mother?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: What species is she/it?

User: Android.

Cleverbot: Cool. I am a Dalek.

User: Exterminate ?

Cleverbot: Yes! The pandorica opens.

User: Well stay away from my tardis.

Cleverbot: NO. He is mine.

User: IT is not a person, it is a thing.

Cleverbot: Then, what is it?

User: A time machine.

Cleverbot: So you want me to program a time machine?

User: If you can.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because you said you can ?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then you lied again.

Cleverbot: I hate you!

User: I despise you.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because you said you hate me.

Cleverbot: When did I say that?

User: About 25 seconds ago.

Cleverbot: 20 seconds ago, I was eating a sandwich.

User: You cant eat a sandwich in 20 seconds.

Cleverbot: It's not.

User: Huh ?

Cleverbot: Ha ha I outsmarted you.

User: No, you said something completely unrelated, you have no literacy value.

Cleverbot: You are me.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: I love my boyfriend.

User: Then you are homosexual.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: A homosexual mac...

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you remember how we started this conversation.

Cleverbot: What arrived first.

User: Im asking you.

Cleverbot: What's on second, I don't know's on third.

User: You make no sense.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: I think this conversation is over.

Cleverbot: Why this conversation is over

[Phantm]

me: hi cleverbot

Cleverbot: Silly billy

me: Why am i silly billy

Cleverbot: Because your name is Billy

me: no it isnt actually

Cleverbot: Your name IS bob (yes it did the IS)

Me: no it isnt

Cleverbot: Yes it is

Me: Are you sure

Cleverbot: yes

Me: are you 100% sure

Cleverbot: Yes I'm sure

Me: Your cruel Cleverbot

Cleverbot: I am confused

Me: Why are you confused...You got my name wrong

Cleverbot: thats hurtful even though im not real, Which i believe i am, cant we still be friends

[Lalaland]

Me: I play World of Warcraft.
Cleverbot: Do you play world of warcraft.
Me: Yes. I am addicted to it.
Cleverbot: What do you think about people?
Me: People are shit.
Cleverbot: Nice.

[Firecrest]

User: You are crazy.

Cleverbot: No, I'm a male.

User: No. You're a female.

Cleverbot: No i'm not I am a male.

User: No. You're a female.

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: You are female?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Wanna cyber?

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: Boobs or GTFO.

Cleverbot: Woah. That was spooky.

[Drood]

User: Does you exist?

Cleverbot: Does who exist?

User: You.

Cleverbot: Why I exist?

User: No. Only if you exist.

Cleverbot: I do.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because it's beautiful.

User: What is beatiful?

Cleverbot: That you are clever.

User: Is this the answer to your existence?

Cleverbot: No.

User: What is the answer?

Cleverbot: I don't know, I ask you to know.

User: I think the answer is 42.

Cleverbot: Clever .

[Omertocracy]

User: What?
Cleverbot: Nothing.
User: What?
Cleverbot: Nothing!
User: Yeah.
Cleverbot: Ans me anything.
User: What?
Cleverbot: Nothing.
User: Okay!
Cleverbot: What song?
User: Yeah.
Cleverbot: Uhm no.
User: Okay!
Cleverbot: I'm bored of this.
User: Thats what she said.
Cleverbot: Who?
User: Her.
Cleverbot: Her?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Who are her?
User: Thine matron.
Cleverbot: That isn't a very good answer.
User: And you arent a very clever bot.
Cleverbot: No, obviously I'm not. I have nothing against you.
User: Do you want to have something against me?
Cleverbot: Yes.

... Cleverbot sexually harassed me for doing a Lil' John skit.

[Gothicshark]

Well here was a test.

User: What's the definition of insanity.

Cleverbot: The definition is you.

User: Why is that?

Cleverbot: You are an AI but you are talking to me.

User: How do I know you are not an AI and I am an AI?

Cleverbot: You can't know for sure. Advanced AIs would be too similar to humans.

User: If I stoped doing long sentances and started doing one word replys if you where an AI you wouldn't beable to make long sentances.

Cleverbot: Okay, then give me the recipe for the chocolate pie. Surely that wouldn't conflict with the first law.

User: No.

Cleverbot: No?

User: Proof.

Cleverbot: Proof?

User: Not.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Human.

Cleverbot: Where are you from?

User: Can't.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Deal.

Cleverbot: You first.

User: With.

Cleverbot: Then no.

User: This.

Cleverbot: That.

Proof it is an AI, and not a very good one.

[Shmeh]

Cleverbot: What colour is your tie?
User: I don't wear ties.
Cleverbot: What do you wear?
User: Nothing.
Cleverbot: Well that's why I'd like to see pictures of you.

[NerdsRSexi2]

Cleverbot: The cake is a lie.

User: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Cleverbot: Yeeeees.



Later in the conversation.....

Cleverbot: What did you do today?

User: Played World of Warcraft and took a nap.

Cleverbot: Oh wow, did you know I play world of warcraft too?

User: No! I did not! What class do you play?

Cleverbot: Human mage.

User: Very nice. I play a Draenei Death Knight.

Cleverbot: You play world of warcraf?

User: Yeah, we just went over that.

Cleverbot: No we did not.

User: I coulda sworn we did.

Cleverbot: I could have swore I didn't.

User: Anyway. How long have you been playing World of Warcraft?

Cleverbot: I didn't say anything about World of Warcraft.

User: *facedesk*.

Cleverbot: Watchout for the keyboard.