Ex-Girlfriend has a new boyfriend.

[terrahero]

Everyone's been through it man, what you want to do though is:

1) Stop all communication with her, unfriend her on facebook/skype/AIM whatever you use (until your over her) don't talk to her on the phone, don't text her, completely get rid of her from your life. If you don't do this, you'll just see glimpses of her and her new bf, and it will hurt like a bitch.

If you want to, so as to not be rude, tell her before hand what your doing and it's nothing against her, but you just want to work to get over her.

2) Accept your never going to be back with her. Ever.

3) Focus on the bad parts of your relationship, the fighting, her bitching at you, etc

4) Hang out with your friends a lot

5) Find something to blow off steam and vent, for me it was working out.



Don't worry man, after 3-4 months you won't even care about her. But the most important thing you have to know, is you HAVE to cut her out of your life for a while to get over her. Oh and girls always rebound/get into a new relationship quicker, it's just how it is. She's using the dude as a crutch, while your miserable : /

You get one advantage though, in 4 months when you stop caring about her, you'll be a hell of a better person, and she really won't be (;

This sounds like pretty solid advice. To throw some ancient wisdom your way, Time heals all wounds. But you gotta stop opening those wound up all the time or the healing process will take that much longer. Avoid her and focus on other things in your live, find something new to fill the empty time.

Might sound a little harsh and mean, but right now you need to care only about number one. You. She's not your girl anymore, and you'll never be together again. No need to keep trying to please her anyway, especially not if this causes you grief in the long run.

[evoco]

I've honestly considered this. I think I'm about ready to do it too.

I hope you do, it will end up helping a lot in the end. I went through a year of pure hell with an ex (we were together 7 years) before I stopped talking to them because I just couldn't do it anymore. I would say I wish I had stopped talking to them earlier, but I'm a firm believer in everything that has happened to you in the past makes who you are today - and I'm ok with that.

[bondgirl]

Im afraid to say you have to accept it. I was in an equal situation like 5 years ago. We were together for a lil bit over 2 years and it broke up. Like 5month later she ended up with dating a really nice guy I've played football with for almost 7 years. Couldnt stand it in the start and canceld every contact with her. After about 6 month of no eyes contact I've met her on a party and it was still a strange feeling to see them together but I could handle it. Sometimes breaking every kind of contact helps a lot to forget and to "forgive". Anyway gl with it mate. I know how it feels.

[seijo]

Let it go... but that friend... is so off the christmas list and any other list. Major violation of the bro code.

[-Zait-]

This sounds like pretty solid advice. To throw some ancient wisdom your way, Time heals all wounds. But you gotta stop opening those wound up all the time or the healing process will take that much longer. Avoid her and focus on other things in your live, find something new to fill the empty time.

Might sound a little harsh and mean, but right now you need to care only about number one. You. She's not your girl anymore, and you'll never be together again. No need to keep trying to please her anyway, especially not if this causes you grief in the long run.

Exactly what this dude said, every time you catch glimpse of her/her bf it'll hurt you and slow down the process of getting over her, focus on yourself now, reflect on your relationship and how you screwed up, because at the end of the day making yourself a better person is all that matters.

[SqueektheWeek]

I have been in a 4 year, and 2 1.5 year relationships.

You have two options.

have some random sex and get back the confidence to date or mull in a hole til youre ready.

Depending on yourself and your feelings/mood both are find choices.

Forget about her. She already has forgotten about you.

If anyone second guesses they arent worth having. There are plenty of girls out there that you could wake up to in the morning and so on. Plenty.

[Litoru]

There's nothing worse than two people who have broken up and they still have this horrible jealousy we've-broken-up-but-we-don't-allow-the-other-person-to-do-single-stuff-thing going on.
If you break up, it's finished, period. She is single, you're single, you're both allowed to do what you want, but you've got no right to sneak around or even care who she hugs, kisses or having sex with. You too can do whatever you want! Don't sulk "but I don't want anyone else than her", give it a couple of months with a positive attitude, without sulking about the situation, and you will barely remember her. You're not going to get together again and your awesome single life starts here!

I was together with a person for 4 years, we broke up during summer break (which is abit more than 2 months in Sweden) and I had to get over that person until we went back to school, since we were in the same class <- a fekking pain, I tell you. I couldn't be happier! Single doesn't equal a shitty life, and, classic, "there's more fish in the sea". You can do it! Move on!

[Berri]

Yeah man that situation sucks.

It's fair game on her part though; you guys broke up, it means she has carte blanche to do whatever she wants with whoever she wants. The best thing to do is to start anew; you need to wipe your slate and have a chance to move on - which can be really hard to get - but step one is to try to not dwell on her as much and find someone / something else to do that keeps your mind occupied.

There's no use suffering for it; we all suffer alone, and that's not healthy.

Forget about her.

[MusikDisaster]

Thanks, everyone. All of you have given me something to think about.

[Intense]

Not going to lie its going to hurt for a while. Honestly to me, dating a friend is a real stab in the back not just on her part but on his as well. Your better off without either one of them. The saying "finding a true friend is harder then finding true love" is very much true. Thinking of her with someone else and that someone else being someone you knew and trusted at one point is going to make it far, far worse.

Life is no rainbow and flowers fairy tail. At times it can be tough and downright cruel. Trying to make yourself feel better by saying "Oh well shes in good hands with him" isnt going to make you feel any less betrayed by what they are doing. Trying to justify it with excuses and ignorance is only going to make the situation last much longer and be alot worse. Not trying to rub salt into your wound here but I will ask you one question.

Exactly how much do you think she cares about you now? How about your friend?

Sometimes hatred can help you through things so long as your not stupid about how you deal with it (meaning just use the pain as a tool to just focus on things and move on, dont go on a shooting spree or something retarded ><.) Makes no difference how much you try to ignore it, sugar coat or justify the betrayal behind it. The hate and anger you have is there and will work in one of two ways. You either deal with it or it deals with you.

Personally, I would despise both of them for doing it, and that hatred would be more then enough for me to move on. But thats just me and obviously not you. Regardless of how you deal with it, I wish you the best of luck in mending your broken heart, just know it will take time either way.

[Deleted]

Just tell her how you feel next time, even say that her dating your old best friend bothers you...but just don't cause a scene. Nothing wrong with telling how you feel aslong you do it on a acceptable tone without being rude etc..

[Deleted]

You need to tell her how you feel, shrugging it off like it doesn't mean anything will be the worst thing you could possibly do and something you will have to live with if this guy and your ex do start taking things more serious.

Your girlfriend might be on the rebound and may well come to her senses that she still loves you so playing it like you dont care is gonna be bad for the both of you.

Tell her how you feel and then whatever her reaction at least you will know how she feels, letting her go without a fight will play on your mind for years.

[Litoru]

Just tell her how you feel next time, even say that her dating your old best friend bothers you...but just don't cause a scene. Nothing wrong with telling how you feel aslong you do it on a acceptable tone without being rude etc..

If he wants to move on as painfree as possible, that is a really bad idea.
Most important of all, it is absolutely none of his business who she's dating. If the OP doesn't want to ruin the rest of his life, he should move on.

I've known people who've broken up like 1-2 years earlier, but one of them started like "it makes me sad when I see you together with other people", so the dude obviously not wanting to hurt her, slept around behind her back instead because he actually wanted to be single. The girl lived in a paranoid state all the time, and the guy who wanted to break up for real couldn't.
Break up with her, lose contact with her for awhile, get over her, and THEN you can be friends.

Edit: Just read the topic. Ex-girlfriend has new boyfriend. EX-girlfriend.

[Deleted]

Be a boss, walk away

[mbrodie0]

Hm, may be the best advice so far.
Thanks everyone for your support. And yes, it is my business, because it deeply affects me. But I appreciate the honesty.

technically you agreed to a break up rather then sorting it out, so once you mutually decide to breakup whatever she does next really isnt your business, you have a hole in you understandable, you miss the girl you fell in love with, she's gone... as prickish and this might sound it's the truth, she is your ex because she isnt the person you fell in love with, nothing is going to bring that girl back... the only thing that will make it better is time.

chin up chief, distract yourself enough and it stops hurting

[zabimaru]

win millions in lottery and she should want you back.

[Kesolovac]

That is sad bro, if you broke up, then she is her own women, and she can do whatever she wants with whomever she wants it. And you can't do anything about it, and if it does hurt you, well... though luck. Though as time goes by, you'll get used to it, and it will be easier...

[SoulPoetry]

the best thing to do is just cut contact and get on with your life- focus on you, go to the gym, work, whatever takes your mind off it. you were fighting for 2 months? doesn't take a genius to work out you're better off without that.

[Ashcroft]

I was with my girl for almost 3 years before we had a nasty breakup. The 11 month following that I just played the field pretty hard and got plenty, BUT I wasn't in love with any of them. Ran into my ex again, long story short, stole her from her then-current bf and now we've been together for 14 month and have a 2 month old together. Sometimes Ex's are Ex's. Sometimes there the one that got away. In my case, I wasn't letting anyone have my 'One'.
If you want something really badly, you might just get it in the end.

[Hottie4Hire]

She's probably already had sex with him. In fact, she probably did it very shortly after breaking up with you.