Corrupt-A-Wish Forum Game

[icedwarrior]

I wish for time-appropriate sunshine and mild temperature in western europe until the 5th of January, followed by a massive blizzard the likes of which are usually only seen on the US east coast, one which prevents any road travel for an entire week, but without any power outages.

Granted. You, however, are stranded on a deserted island with zero supplies, far, far away from civilization when this occurs.

I wish I was fluent in speaking and writing every language that ever existed, and that currently does exist.

[Blueobelisk]

You guys are out of control.

Granted. You now have a broken, dull sword that servers zero purpose, and a "Haki". What you want with a brother of a famous Scandinavian sea-king, I have no idea, especially since he's been dead around the 5th century... I suppose you want to dismember his corpse?

Haki means "willpower," and it just means that if I were to swing a sword or punch someone and I have a lot of willpower, I'd be able to do things I couldn't normally do, destructive wise. It's basically surrounding your weapon or body with some extra reinforced armor.

I wish Blueobelisk would post more personal information on these forums.

Granted. I post my results from a doctor checkup. Since no one here is a doctor except for me, no one can decipher it.

I wish that I can finally find the willpower to actually start writing my book.

Granted, you start writing the book but it takes you ten years to write the book and it does extremely poorly. You end up broke and alone with the best years of your life wasted.

I wish that Blueobelisk would post more of his own personal information on these forums.

Granted, I post the address to my PO Box. The result is all the moderators + you + nzall sending me love letters. In fact, I heard a rumor that Mynta was waiting outside of my PO Box for days trying to see me in person, until the mail people called the police and personally escorted him back to wherever he lives.

I wish this LFR queue will allow me to join and kill the first boss.

Granted, you join and the first boss dies, but you have to stay for the last 3 (?) bosses to receive loot for the first boss. The last 3 bosses take two hours each to complete, and your LFR group breaks it into three days to do all that. To get the group back together you all have to log in at the same time and queue at the exact same moment when the sun aligns with Jupiter for the solstice. However, there's always one bad/casual in the group who shows up late.

As for the pro corruption: I got a number of edges on that:

1) I'm autistic, so I take stuff more literal and look for hidden meanings behind most stuff (not always beneficial).
2) I'm a developer, part of my task is to think like a computer to find flaws. computers think pretty literal and to the point, so I find a lot more literal meaning in those.
3) If you do any work with service agreements and other contacts, you automatically learn to write them so there can't be any ambiguity. The reverse is also true: you're more likely to find legal loopholes and inconsistencies which will allow you to adhere to the contract while still having some freedom. having parents which do this exact same thing as well helps.

Ya I sort of knew you were crazy already.

I wish to get 100% on my Bio test, and take it on time.

Not sure why'd you'd include the take it on time part....but...

Granted, you get 100% on your biology test, but that test was worth 5% of your final grade. Every week for the rest of the semester you have to take bio tests and they escalate in difficulty as the weeks go by. Also, attendance for the class counts for 50%, but the tests are on a labtop so you can do it from home if you want to, or you can do it in class. But you have to take it during the class time no matter what.

Or. Or. Granted, you get 100% but you had to suck your teacher's dick for him to pull the strings for you to get that 100.

I wish it would remain around 10 degrees for the duration of Winter.

Granted, it's 10 degrees Kelvin. AKA - 263 Celsius. Your house is frozen. Also, you move really slowly because your particles are slow. Basically you die.

Wtf lol you guys are picking the same corruptions as me.

Granted it's 10 degrees all winter but you were installing a pool and that temperature ends up fucking the pool up and ruins your backyard.

I wish for time-appropriate sunshine and mild temperature in western europe until the 5th of January, followed by a massive blizzard the likes of which are usually only seen on the US east coast, one which prevents any road travel for an entire week, but without any power outages.

Granted. It happens. You're basically trapped in your house and you were lucky enough to prepare food for the week and no one goes outside, everyone stays inside, and you completely have power. But the sewer system is fucked up and you can't flush your toilet bowls for the week.

I wish I was fluent in speaking and writing every language that ever existed, and that currently does exist.

Granted, you're the most multilingual guy in the world, and you can write too or whatever. You even know that language they made for the movie Avatar. The CIA give you a translator job and pay you $the big bucks$. But you lack basic normal non-idiot skills. You don't know biology or any other science, and you can't solve the simplest math. 2+2? Who the fuck knows. You can't even figure out how to use a calculator. But you are extremely good at writing and speaking in other languages. You leave the CIA out of frustration (remember those big bucks I was talking about? You were too bad at math to realize it was $2 an hour) and go soul searching. You travel the world and can fit in anywhere, and people like you because you're a good speaker, but you have no other real talent. Eventually you partner up with this beautiful woman you met in some country to translate some ancient language or some shit, and she solves the puzzles and maps shit out and do all that. After travelling through an underwater waterfall and journeying through an ancient temple, you translate it, but the CIA shows and shoots the girl and takes the secret or whatever. Turns out they were using you since the beginning to find that secret and they let you leave, just so they could follow you. Girl dies. You kill the CIA people. Temple collapses on you and you die. Fast forward two years, on the beach, some kid is playing and sees a message in a bottle. He goes out into the water to get it and reads the message. Turns out you translated the secret and sent it out for the world to know. The kid spreads the word and you become a famous hero in history.

I wish I knew C++.

[icedwarrior]

Haki means "willpower," and it just means that if I were to swing a sword or punch someone and I have a lot of willpower, I'd be able to do things I couldn't normally do, destructive wise. It's basically surrounding your weapon or body with some extra reinforced armor.

No, I've decided it's what I posted earlier. It's more fun.

Granted. I post my results from a doctor checkup. Since no one here is a doctor except for me, no one can decipher it.

We can't use google?

Granted, I post the address to my PO Box. The result is all the moderators + you + nzall sending me love letters. In fact, I heard a rumor that Mynta was waiting outside of my PO Box for days trying to see me in person, until the mail people called the police and personally escorted him back to wherever he lives.

Hell yes. Let me start on those love letters right now...

Not sure why'd you'd include the take it on time part....but...

I can't imagine why...

Granted, you get 100% on your biology test, but that test was worth 5% of your final grade. Every week for the rest of the semester you have to take bio tests and they escalate in difficulty as the weeks go by. Also, attendance for the class counts for 50%, but the tests are on a labtop so you can do it from home if you want to, or you can do it in class. But you have to take it during the class time no matter what.

I assume you meant laptop Anyway, tests on a computer, lol...I'd just google all the answers, 100% on every test.

Or. Or. Granted, you get 100% but you had to suck your teacher's dick for him to pull the strings for you to get that 100.

Teacher's a female, unless you meant that figuratively.

Wtf lol you guys are picking the same corruptions as me.

You mean copying us? We posted first...

[...] You kill the CIA people. Temple collapses on you and you die. Fast forward two years, on the beach, some kid is playing and sees a message in a bottle. He goes out into the water to get it and reads the message. Turns out you translated the secret and sent it out for the world to know. The kid spreads the word and you become a famous hero in history.

How is that a corruption? I fucking won the world in that.

I wish I knew C++.

Granted. You know C++, but it takes so long for you to learn it that it's an outdated language that serves no purpose. Don't you know? It's all about C++(-)+#+= now.

I wish I had the time to play D&D with my friends today.

[Deleted]

I wish I had the time to play D&D with my friends today.

Granted but the game will last forever and the GM hates you.

I wish i were the GM.

[Blueobelisk]

Not quite sure how to corrupt that, I don't really know how Dungeons and Dragons works lol...

Granted, you're the GM. The GM of WoW. You spend 12 hours a day answering tickets about people complaining about no flying or whatever the fuck the WoD controversy is.

I wish I could party like a rockstar.

- - - Updated - - -

I wish I had the time to play D&D with my friends today.

Granted. You show up late and they start without you You end up. Uhhhhh. Literally the only thing I know about this is what I saw in one episode of Dexter's Lab.

Granted, but you die on your first roll. (Get it? "Die" as in dice. First roll. Yeah, me neither.)

Btw in that last corruption, you initially survived the temple collapse. One arm and both legs ended up getting crushed, and you couldn't move around, but you still had one arm free. You took a CIA pen and a CIA Agent's business card (he happened to die right next to you) and his bottle of coke (it was a long trip) to write your message, and you ate the CIA guy and made him last for two years until the moment that kid got the message, and you could die in peace. But. But. Those two years were a living hell of pain and torture.

[icedwarrior]

I don't really know how Dungeons and Dragons works lol...

You disappoint me.

I wish I could party like a rockstar.

Granted, but you get your ass kicked. You know, "party like a rock star, kick a lil' ass...~"

Btw in that last corruption, you initially survived the temple collapse. One arm and both legs ended up getting crushed, and you couldn't move around, but you still had one arm free. You took a CIA pen and a CIA Agent's business card (he happened to die right next to you) and his bottle of coke (it was a long trip) to write your message, and you ate the CIA guy and made him last for two years until the moment that kid got the message, and you could die in peace. But. But. Those two years were a living hell of pain and torture.

Nope! Too late! You failed. Can't update your wishes!

I wish Blueobelisk was my Dungeon Master. And he was a fair and entertaining DM.

[Blueobelisk]

I wasn't too late, you just didn't read between the lines. A good story teller leaves something for the imagination of the audience. Trust me, I'm a doctor who criticizes and doesn't respect authors.

[Blueobelisk]

Granted. I'm the dungeon master, I'm fair. I'm quite entertaining and I make the game good. However, I smell bad and none of your friends can take the smell so they go home and you have to play alone for your team. (It's still fun alone somehow.)

I wish Iced knew that the people on my friend's list get to know some personal information about me and even get to help influence some of my business decisions.

[Wayne25uk]

Granted,he knows all your business,including bank details and consequently wipes you out financially.

I wish for a party in my honor as i have been away 2 long!

[Blueobelisk]

Granted, party is tonight 8 PM. Iced is bringing the salsa and chips, I'm bringing the Doritos and Barbecue Lays, and Nzall is bringing the soda. But you [expectedly] get banned before the party, so we just have a party by ourselves. P.S. We rented hookers.

I wish Wayne was a contestant on "Extreme Weight Loss." Idc if Wayne is underweight of overweight or whatever. He just has to be on the show.

[Deleted]

Granted, party is tonight 8 PM. Iced is bringing the salsa and chips, I'm bringing the Doritos and Barbecue Lays, and Nzall is bringing the soda. But you [expectedly] get banned before the party, so we just have a party by ourselves. P.S. We rented hookers.

I wish Wayne was a contestant on "Extreme Weight Loss." Idc if Wayne is underweight of overweight or whatever. He just has to be on the show.

granted. he loses weight by skinning himself. you see this and end up fapping to the gore. your partner, however, gouges out their own eyes in horror.

I wish someone made a bromance film involving furry love between Blueobelisk and Wayne25uk, with a guest starring of Icedwarrior.

[icedwarrior]

I wish someone made a bromance film involving furry love between Blueobelisk and Wayne25uk, with a guest starring of Icedwarrior.

"That's good, boy -- get in there nice and deep-like." That's the first thing I thought of when I saw that. I'm weird. And dirty, apparently.

Aaaaaanyways, granted. Quentin Tarantino makes a bromance film of the above. However, at the end, there's a bloody shootout, and only the guest star (me!) make it out alive. The ending shows me, holding the two dead bodies of Blueobelisk and Wayne25uk in my hands, mourning my loss. The second movie is about me taking revenge for my fallen comrades.

I wish nzall was involved in the aforementioned second movie.

[Deleted]

"That's good, boy -- get in there nice and deep-like." That's the first thing I thought of when I saw that. I'm weird. And dirty, apparently.

Aaaaaanyways, granted. Quentin Tarantino makes a bromance film of the above. However, at the end, there's a bloody shootout, and only the guest star (me!) make it out alive. The ending shows me, holding the two dead bodies of Blueobelisk and Wayne25uk in my hands, mourning my loss. The second movie is about me taking revenge for my fallen comrades.

I wish nzall was involved in the aforementioned second movie.

Granted. I'm your insanely competent sidekick who you can't go without, not even on the toilet.

Edit: forget about survivors.

I wish my life was epic enough for a Lindsey Stirling soundtrack, a voiceover by Morgan freeman and a monumental bollywood scene by every single bollywood actor around today, with me surviving it all.

[Blueobelisk]

Lol you can't edit your wish killing me and Wayne off, wtf.

You guys are posting some sick stuff. Click on this thread in class today. See Iced's post. "I must have clicked Funny Pictures thread but accident." I actually see what's going on in the picture. So did the guy sitting next to me. Awkward...

[icedwarrior]

Lol you can't edit your wish killing me and Wayne off, wtf.

Why not?

You guys are posting some sick stuff. Click on this thread in class today. See Iced's post. "I must have clicked Funny Pictures thread but accident." I actually see what's going on in the picture. So did the guy sitting next to me. Awkward...

So why aren't you doing work in class, hmm?

~skip me~

[Blueobelisk]

What's Bollywood? There was this decent looking girl in my art class, and we had to do a basically blackboard forum post on an intro about ourselves and some bullshit about art, I don't even fucking remember. So I put down "I'm genius physics major/math minor on track for premed or engineering, and I think art is worthless, I hate it. Except this one time in 2nd grade I drew a picture of a giraffe and my teacher gave me a $10 Barnes and noble gift card." Short and sweet, made me seem genius and arrogant enough.

But that decent looking girl writes "I'm a speech pathology major (I loled) and I've always liked to express myself with dancing." And somehow Bollywood got thrown into the conversation and I didn't know what was up. Btw girl was late on doing an (online) assignment and she sometimes leaves class early, not my type.

Granted nzall. People follow you around and chronicle your life and you even get a soundtrack like Peter in that family guy episode. But you're like...you're like this one guy who I read about in a horror story. Hes good looking and when he gets up, he gets to fuck a hot chick every morning, and uhhh he does some other stuff during the day, but all of this is recorded and he's trapped in the confines of his own room. It's recorded for the entertainment of other people, until the time his looks fade and they suck his life essence out and let him live basically as a tree stump shackled in some other room, like his father before him.

I'll recorrupt it and do the others later.

I wish Iced was somehow one of my close knit friends (aka on my friends list) and we could conspire stuff together. But mostly he'd help me by drawing something and giving me art advice. Read the above story, does it sound like I know art?

[Wayne25uk]

Granted,its called Iceblue Mountain - The broken back edition. But as i was sick on the day of filming Nzall had to take my place on the mega super furry anal love scene.

I wish i was clever at not being clever in a clever sort of way that only clever people of a clever nature would cleverly get.

Wow how late was i with this reply lol oops.

[Blueobelisk]

Hurry up and get home from school/playing with your nerdy Dungeons and Dragons friends Iced!

[icedwarrior]

Hurry up and get home from school/playing with your nerdy Dungeons and Dragons friends Iced!

I was / am busy getting kicked out of my house, and moving in to my father's place, of which doesn't have internet.

I wish i was clever at not being clever in a clever sort of way that only clever people of a clever nature would cleverly get.

Granted. Now people think you're a pretentious douchebag that knows everything. No one ever talks to you again. Ever.

I wish Iced was somehow one of my close knit friends (aka on my friends list) and we could conspire stuff together. But mostly he'd help me by drawing something and giving me art advice. Read the above story, does it sound like I know art?

Granted. However, I have no artistic ability whatsoever (true story, I can only manipulate stuff in PS, really...), so, while I can google buzzwords and sound like I know what I'm doing, I end up giving you terrible advice. Because I sound like I know what I'm doing, you accept my advice, and turn in a project (with my "awesome" help) for your final. It...doesn't turn out too well, and you fail your class (I've decided you're taking art classes). The picture you turned in? A picture of a dick, in a fancy sephia filter. The women don't exactly like that, and ignore you because of it. The men, well, you get hit on by all the gay guys.

I wish I wasn't forced to move.

[Blueobelisk]

Granted, you're free to stay, but your school moves another 2 hours away and commute is hard. Oh and you stay in school for another 4 years.

I wish Iced was good at art.

Btw I do have an art class but this is a business project. And I don't mean business as in a class, I mean just a project I wanna do on my own. You should up your photoshop skills and help me out.