Not sure what to make of this (girl problems)

[Puupi]

I said "Girl names here, I think you are sweet, pretty, and incredibly smart, and I'd like to get to know you better. Would you like to get dinner and see a movie with me this weekend?" Thats word for word.

You should have left the bolded words out and just said you'd like to know her better and get a dinner.

The bolded part doesn't give the impression you want to know her better, it gives the impression that you want to fuck her right here right now.

It's creepy if she doesn't feel the same... and what are the odds that she does?

[Mifuyne]

Good to know

Gives off the vibe that you are already inlove with her, adding pressure to her decisions regarding just hanging out.
Maybe she cannot be arsed at all right now with anything related to love.
Setting the bar lower and more casual (let's hang out "name") with less information given by you makes it easier to say yes.

You'll also get to know her stance about dating/you/love/etc when you sneak in such topics while hanging out.

[LedZeppelin]

You should have left the bolded words out and just said you'd like to know her better and get a dinner.

I get that but is it really THAT bad?

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Gives off the vibe that you are already inlove with her, adding pressure to her decisions regarding just hanging out.
Maybe she cannot be arsed at all right now with anything related to love.
Setting the bar lower and more casual (let's hang out "name") with less information given by you makes it easier to say yes.

You'll also get to know her stance about dating/you/love/etc when you sneak in such topics while hanging out.

Thank you.

[Puupi]

I get that but is it really THAT bad?

Yes.

She is your friend/acquintance, right?

And she said no.

It's THAT bad.

[Witchblade77]

I said "Girl names here, I think you are sweet, pretty, and incredibly smart, and I'd like to get to know you better. Would you like to get dinner and see a movie with me this weekend?" Thats word for word.

ok. next question. are you absolutely sure that the block has to do with you asking her out and not something unrelated you said on facebook? if that is not the case either, her reaction sounds extreme, but it also sounds like a defensive reaction of someone who possibly has been in a situation of "friend is interested in more, it ends up going very badly" there is enough of a "she led me on, and then friendzoned me, that bitch" bullshit out there, some of which she may have personaly dealt with, that she is making sure that absolutely, positively there is NO leading anyone on, or wrong signals involved.

does your friend and his wife know you asked her out? maybe ask your friend if she is avoiding you to this degree?

edited, also that is a good point above, which kinda ties into the point I was making. its possible that she had prior bad experiences, and they have started with similar profuse compliments in her direction.

[Sliske]

So I guess my question is:
1. Is she overreacting with the avoidance and facebook blocking?
2. Can I expect things return to they way they were before I asked her out given enough time?

1. Yes
2. No

Asking people out and being rejected / having to reject someone is probably one of the only things that can ruin a friendship. I know from experience (both ways) and pretty much everyone will tell you the same.

Its just hyper fucking awkward. Even if she pretended she was fine around you ,she won't be. She will always be awkward around you from now on (Again, experience and again, people will agree with this) - being asked out by someone you're not into is major run to the hills territory. Its just cruel to hang around them any longer. Its impossible to get over someone unless they do something really terrible to you or you find someone else - she didn't do the former and you haven't done the latter.

Shes just avoiding awkward looks, conversations and so on.

As for what will happen during meetings with your buddy and his wife, prepare for awkwardness the likes of which you've never seen before.

[LedZeppelin]

Yes.

She is your friend/acquintance, right?

And she said no.

It's THAT bad.

Idk I just saw it as run of the mill rejection

[Puupi]

Idk I just saw it as run of the mill rejection

She blocked you from facebook.

That isn't just a "no". That's "never".

[LedZeppelin]

ok. next question. are you absolutely sure that the block has to do with you asking her out and not something unrelated you said on facebook? if that is not the case either, her reaction sounds extreme, but it also sounds like a defensive reaction of someone who possibly has been in a situation of "friend is interested in more, it ends up going very badly" there is enough of a "she led me on, and then friendzoned me, that bitch" bullshit out there, some of which she may have personaly dealt with, that she is making sure that absolutely, positively there is NO leading anyone on, or wrong signals involved.

does your friend and his wife know you asked her out? maybe ask your friend if she is avoiding you to this degree?

edited, also that is a good point above, which kinda ties into the point I was making. its possible that she had prior bad experiences, and they have started with similar profuse compliments in her direction.

Yes, Ive only messaged her once on facebook and that was like 1 month ago asking if she wanted to play league of legends. Ive never tagged her in a post or written on her wall or anything like that. No jokes or anything.

Im not mad at her in any sense and I hold nothing against her.

Friend knows for sure, no idea if his wife knows.

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She blocked you from facebook.

That isn't just a "no". That's "never".

Guess so lmao

[Deleted]

Yes, Ive only messaged her once on facebook and that was like 1 month ago asking if she wanted to play league of legends. Ive never tagged her in a post or written on her wall or anything like that. No jokes or anything.

I would block you to if u asked me to play LoL.

Dota Ftw

[zlygork]

I said "Girl names here, I think you are sweet, pretty, and incredibly smart, and I'd like to get to know you better. Would you like to get dinner and see a movie with me this weekend?" Thats word for word.

Not saying that this is the cause of the rejection, but generally bombarding someone with compliments no matter how genuine tends to be seen as odd if not flat out creepy. Think about the ugliest girl or guy you can imagine saying that sentence to you.
I'd have rolled these compliments over days/weeks, and not forced any compliment right before inviting her on a date (she might wonder if you are just trying really hard to quickly get in her pants if you throw everything at her together)

Just my 2 cents on the issue. The rest is up to her.

[Witchblade77]

Yes, Ive only messaged her once on facebook and that was like 1 month ago asking if she wanted to play league of legends. Ive never tagged her in a post or written on her wall or anything like that. No jokes or anything.

Im not mad at her in any sense and I hold nothing against her.

Friend knows for sure, no idea if his wife knows.

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Guess so lmao

let me clarify. something UNRELATED. like expressing an opinion that she vehemently disagrees with, but has no desire to argue about.

in any case, I don't know her situation but it honestly sounds like scorched earth approach based on prior bad experiences with friend wanting to be more then a friend. nuke it from orbit. its the only way to be sure that it doesn't come back to haunt you. even if you are not that guy. still better to be sure then sorry down the road.

[meheez]

Just FHRITP

[LedZeppelin]

let me clarify. something UNRELATED. like expressing an opinion that she vehemently disagrees with, but has no desire to argue about.

in any case, I don't know her situation but it honestly sounds like scorched earth approach based on prior bad experiences with friend wanting to be more then a friend. nuke it from orbit. its the only way to be sure that it doesn't come back to haunt you. even if you are not that guy. still better to be sure then sorry down the road.

I dont express political opinions or any opinions for that matter on facebook

[Puupi]

I also wouldn't ever mention about the date invitation to her again. If she wants to talk about it and brings it up, sure you can have a chat about it.

But don't you start talking about it. You already pissed on her porch, don't shit on it.

[Laurabelle]

Yea, I think you're pretty screwed. I don't envy your situation. You might have to abandon your clique altogether, or at least she's thinking that.

[LedZeppelin]

Yea, I think you're pretty screwed. I don't envy your situation. You might have to abandon your clique altogether, or at least she's thinking that.

Yeah thats not happening

[mpowers8]

Yeah thats not happening

This is the sister of your friend's wife? Get ready for that happening. If your friend has to choose you over marital strife he's going to choose the wife. It might not get that bad, but just be prepared for it.

Bring your new girlfriend around, you'll be shocked how fast that block gets removed and she starts getting really interested in what you've been up to lately.

[Deleted]

What happened to basic communication

[AwkwardSquirtle]

It's been a week, she'll get over it.