who do u think should pay on first dates?

[Orby]

Whats the less sexist option these days? :P

[Low Hanging Fruit]

I always went into dates expecting to pay. A few times I was told no no I got it or I got mine. Which is ok. I got to play the are you sure, I will pick it up, type of conversation game. But I never went into these situations without the ability to pay for them or with paying for them somehow being a financial accomplishment to get away with not paying for it.

[Seramore]

itt: people encouraging the idea of literally buying a woman's time

[rohk]

eh i usually pay it

[Tinytalon]

I personally don't get this whole "The one who asked should pay" shit. I'd feel awfully awkward if the guy had to pay for everything. I'd rather pay for my own meal and if I can't afford going out, then I'll kindly let my "date" know that now's not a good time for me.

And why it makes me feel awfully awkward. It feels like I'm being paid for my time and company, and you know what that sounds like, right?

[Locruid]

If I ask out one of them "I'm independent and I pay for my own stuff" person then they are NOT the right one for me. I'm a bit old fashion and a gentleman. I'd just decline and find my one that agrees with my sentiments.

[the game]

Whoever extended the invitation.

[Seramore]

If I ask out one of them "I'm independent and I pay for my own stuff" person then they are NOT the right one for me. I'm a bit old fashion and a gentleman. I'd just decline and find my one that agrees with my sentiments.

spoiler: being "old fashioned" is no longer considered being a gentleman

and is actually pretty sexist lmao

[Deleted]

Split, its not 1950 anymore.

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Query, does it matter either way? Like do you have separate finances? Me or the misses paying is is moot, it all comes from the same well.

We both have our own finances still (something we are talking about trowing in a one pile soon) but still doesn't matter. Everything I own she owns and everything she owns, she owns anyway! :P

[kamuimac]

spoiler: being "old fashioned" is no longer considered being a gentleman

and is actually pretty sexist lmao

everything is sexist nowadays

so the only mature thing is to just dont give any f...s about PC feministic bs that idiots spread around.

i dont know even a single woman around me who dont like to be treated as a "weaker" sex in personal life regardless how succesfull she is in work and who dont like "manly" men.

[Player Twelve]

If I ask out one of them "I'm independent and I pay for my own stuff" person then they are NOT the right one for me. I'm a bit old fashion and a gentleman. I'd just decline and find my one that agrees with my sentiments.

Is this code word for "I paid for your food and drinks, now you should have sex with me at the end of the evening"?

[Deleted]

Is this code word for "I paid for your food and drinks, now you should have sex with me at the end of the evening"?

No. Its stems back from times where women were supposed to be home and look after kids while men were working 60 hour weeks in their jobs.
Its code for wanting to be able to provide for your spouse and kids and feel pride when you are able to do so.

I still pay for every date me and my gf/wife go on not because we have sex but because I prefer to do so as I make more money and I feel great being able to do it to care of my family.

Stop being so goddamn sexist for once.
Not every guy in the world wants to sleep with you, I bet a very small number would with the way you present your self on this forum.

[Will]

We both have our own finances still (something we are talking about trowing in a one pile soon) but still doesn't matter. Everything I own she owns and everything she owns, she owns anyway! :P

so let me get this right, she owns everything you own, but you don't own anything she owns? Again, read the post you just quoted: It's not 1950 anymore! Seems like you have a bit of a one-sided material aspect to your relationship.

I would always go with either split 50/50, or pay for what you personally chose. Saying "the one who proposes the date pays" is a bit dumb because nine times out of ten it's blokes these days, let's be honest. If I order one drink and one main, and she orders 4 drinks, a starter, a main and a dessert, why the fuck should I have to pay for ALL of that when, given the fact it's a date, she's still a relative stranger? If she wants to be greedy and eat twice as much as me, she can pay for those extras.

now don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly happy to be a gentleman, hold doors open, all that stuff, but I'm not going to perpetuate some late 20th century nonsense in the modern day and age. I'm not super well off financially. Likewise, if she had invited me out and offered to pay, I'd similarly but politely say no, please don't pay for me

[Deleted]

so let me get this right, she owns her and your possessions, but you don't own anything she owns? Again, read the post you just quoted: It's not 1950 anymore!

I would always go with either split 50/50, or pay for what you personally chose. Saying "the one who proposes the date pays" is a bit dumb because nine times out of ten it's blokes these days, let's be honest. If I order one drink and one main, and she orders 4 drinks, a starter, a main and a dessert, why the fuck should I have to pay for ALL of that when, given the fact it's a date, she's still a relative stranger? If she wants to be greedy and eat twice as much as me, she can pay for those extras.

now don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly happy to be a gentleman, hold doors open, all that stuff, but I'm not going to perpetuate some victorian-era nonsense in the modern day and age. I'm not super well off financially.

Its a joke... that wasn't meant as serious. Its something that some married people say. Like woman is always right?
Sorry should have added that it was a joke :P.

And I bolded that part because that is the difference between me and my partner. I make 50% more then she does. Its only right for me to take on more of the costs.

[Player Twelve]

No.

Ok.

Its stems back from times where women were supposed to be home and look after kids while men were working 60 hour weeks in their jobs.

That's worse than what I asked if it was. That's basically wanting a house maid and babysitter that's there for you to have sex with when you get home from work.

Its code for wanting to be able to provide for your spouse and kids and feel pride when you are able to do so.

Stop being so goddamn sexist for once.

You can't say this when you say what he wants is:

Its stems back from times where women were supposed to be home and look after kids while men were working 60 hour weeks in their jobs.

I'm the one that's sexist? Lmao, learn what the terms you use means.

[Will]

Its a joke... that wasn't meant as serious. Its something that some married people say. Like woman is always right?
Sorry should have added that it was a joke :P.

And I bolded that part because that is the difference between me and my partner. I make 50% more then she does. Its only right for me to take on more of the costs.

Oh, sorry, I didn't see the joke. Thanks for clarifying. And you see, your circumstance makes sense because you're already together and you've ascertained the incomes and decided on a happy medium that suits you both. If we were instead thinking of say, first or second dates... yeah. I see this question asked a lot here on MMOC

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The person who pays should be the person who invited the other.

If person A asks person B out on a date, it is not logically the responsibility of person B to pay for something person A asked for. Person B does not implicitly have to pay for anything- they are the guest.

Asking for equity in this is a gross misunderstanding of gender politics and relationship dynamics. And also, responsibility.

I fail to see what part of asking someone if they want to go out for a meal implies that you're going to pay?

I mean yeah if I tell her in advance that I'll pay, then fine, but if you ask me, ASSUMING the other person is going to pay simply because it was their idea? That's presumptuous at best, and if you silently go ahead and let them pay? That's downright selfish at worst. This is the 21st century, it's time some of you started 'going Dutch' as they say.

If a girl asked me on a date I'll be damned if I just sit there like a lemon and watch her pay for me. If we agreed in advance, yeah sure, but otherwise? No. And if she turned around and expected me to pay despite her asking me out, by your logic, I'd be totally within my rights to say "this was your idea, why aren't you paying?". Again, just making assumptions is not healthy. We have the gift of speech and language for a reason, why not USE it so we understand one another rather than just making guesses based on outdated societal norms?

[Deleted]

Ok.


That's worse than what I asked if it was. That's basically wanting a house maid and babysitter that's there for you to have sex with when you get home from work.








You can't say this when you say what he wants is:



I'm the one that's sexist? Lmao, learn what the terms you use means.

I fully agree with you on a lot of your posts on Racism but you're such a feminazi on other subjects.
Pretty weird we can be pretty much on agreement on a lot of things but when it comes to men vs woman you just turn into .. well this.

I explained where the saying comes from. You just added your own sexist shit to it and formed it to your agenda.
Also not sure why its all of a sudden a bad thing to be able to provide for your family but guess you will fill in those blanks in a really sexist way.

[Player Twelve]

I fully agree with you on a lot of your posts on Racism but you're such a feminazi on other subjects.

How about you don't use terms you don't know what they mean?

I explained where the saying comes from. You just added your own sexist shit to it and formed it to your agenda.

That's not "my own sexist shit", that's what it actually was. Women to not be free to do what they wanted to do.

Also not sure why its all of a sudden a bad thing to be able to provide for your family but guess you will fill in those blanks in a really sexist way.

It isn't but when you think that the woman should be at home and taking care of the kids instead of pursuing what she wants, that is sexist.

[Deleted]

Oh, sorry, I didn't see the joke. Thanks for clarifying. And you see, your circumstance makes sense because you're already together and you've ascertained the incomes and decided on a happy medium that suits you both. If we were instead thinking of say, first or second dates... yeah. I see this question asked a lot here on MMOC

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I fail to see what part of asking someone if they want to go out for a meal implies that you're going to pay?

I mean yeah if I tell her in advance that I'll pay, then fine, but if you ask me, ASSUMING the other person is going to pay simply because it was their idea? That's presumptuous at best, and if you silently go ahead and let them pay? That's downright selfish at worst. This is the 21st century, it's time some of you started 'going Dutch' as they say.

Even on first dates I would usually pay to be honest. Haven't had any in 9 years now seeing I've been with my partner for that long.
Never really thought about it to be honest, always felt like that was how it worked. (not saying I've been on a lot of first dates, we are on a gaming forum after all) :P

[Will]

Haha me neither Woozie, me neither :P