Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker

[Kraenen]

None of these people are Kathleen Kennedy, which is the point. Seriously, it's like blaming the Weinsteins for any of the flops they made. She is not a creative. She is an executive. She hired people who are generally considered competent, and she ushered the movie to release, while acting as its spokesperson. She may have some blame in not forcing a collaboration between the directors, but the directors knew each other and also didn't try and collaborate with each other.

But blaming her for the shitty writing is hilarious, at best.

I think in JJ's case, you can tell what he was going to do with Star Wars after seeing Star Trek, the others I'm not familiar with.

[Slybak]

Saw it. Terrible. Terrible terrible terrible terrible. Insultingly terrible.

Unimaginative, shallow, vapid. Paint by numbers. It was like someone combed Reddit for the most witless chuds with the most braindead ideas about what Star Wars is "really about," congealed those ideas into a script (while hopped up on what can only be described as a heroic amount of cocaine), and decided to spoon feed it to the audience like they're babies. Like big overgrown babies who have no clue where mommy is until she says "peekaboo." Like the kind of people for whom Harry Potter is too high-brow.

Should have given the whole thing to Rian Johnson. What a waste.

[Goldielocks]

Lucas rewrote canon constantly. He’s no longer the god of Star Wars, ergo what he says no longer matters.

That's not a retort. The movie doesn't rewrite any of it. The film just ignores the implications.

What, do you think fans have the same status as the filmmakers or something?

[TheramoreIsTheBomb]

Spoiler Free Review:
Absolute garbage. They ruined Palpatines character and wasted Kylo Ren at his BEST moment. Just poofs away and then the big ass plot hole in the beginning??? I give this 1 star only for Kylo Ren, C3-P0, Lando, and Finn’s fan service that he should’ve gotten when Kylo was trying to grab the lightsaber in TFA

Spoiler Review:
Rey gains abilities out of her asshole and beyond. Palpatine returns the fuck out of no where with just him reprising episode 3, the best film in this saga, which is an insult to that movie. Palpatines dialogue is abysmal. How they killed him off is so disrespectful to the character. Doesn’t sound like him at all. Hux just is a spy for god knows what reason only to be killed off by some memberry character with hardly a character to remember. Finn never expresses his feelings for Rey. Poe never expresses his feelings for Finn. I could go on and on but I wont. Kathleen Kennedy, go FUCK YOURSELF.

[Sanguinerd]

I also like how they decided to retcon Luke into knowing about Palpatine, trying to kill his own nephew and then fucking off to some random planet to hide like a coward. That's such a Luke Skywalker thing to do.

Also who the fuck made the convenient as hell dagger that has a extendable hilt that perfectly lines up with the fallen wreckage of the Death Star(that despite being blown into a million pieces didn't actually explode but rather just break apart and crash into a planet) and shows you where you need to find some stupid wayfinder..?!

[Akasha64]

Fuckin this new trilogy makes the prequel triology look like Citizen Kane. Holy shit this was a total waste. And Rey is literally the worst Star Wars character ever. Op like shit and annoying cunt. Jar Jar looks like an Oscar performance next to her.

We all know that was going to happen. You didn't have to go see the last one if you didn't like the first 2. You think this was magically turn things around for the trilogy? Doubtful.

[Fayolynn]

Spoiler Free Review:
Absolute garbage. They ruined Palpatines character and wasted Kylo Ren at his BEST moment. Just poofs away and then the big ass plot hole in the beginning??? I give this 1 star only for Kylo Ren, C3-P0, Lando, and Finn’s fan service that he should’ve gotten when Kylo was trying to grab the lightsaber in TFA

Spoiler Review:
Rey gains abilities out of her asshole and beyond. Palpatine returns the fuck out of no where with just him reprising episode 3, the best film in this saga, which is an insult to that movie. Palpatines dialogue is abysmal. How they killed him off is so disrespectful to the character. Doesn’t sound like him at all. Hux just is a spy for god knows what reason only to be killed off by some memberry character with hardly a character to remember. Finn never expresses his feelings for Rey. Poe never expresses his feelings for Finn. I could go on and on but I wont. Kathleen Kennedy, go FUCK YOURSELF.

Good, good. Let the hate flow through you.

To me the worst is that ending which makes no sense other than to be a nostalgia bomb. Rey goes to Tatooine to honor the Skywalkers. Only... Shmi died there, Anakin hated the place, Luke wanted to leave as soon as she could and Leia's spent time there as a half naked slave to a giant slug. There is zero good reasons for that to be the place for her to honor them. Then to top it all off she takes the last name for herself, which again makes no sense because she knew Leia as a solo and she only lived with Luke for all of 5 minutes and the two didn't really get along well. The ending only existed so they could do a shitty call back Luke with the Binary stars set. Stupid, horrible, shitty insulting ending.

[Goldielocks]

No, but Lucas fucked up episode 4 and it had to be saved in the edit. 5 and 6 were mostly done by others. The prequels, where he had total control, were fucking awful. The new movies are miles better than the prequels, even episode 9 which is the weakest of the 3.

Yeah, but still having Palpatine alive seriously fucks with the cohesion of these three trilogies. I can't even disagree that the chosen one part fucked up a father saving a son. Honestly it would have been better for it to remain that way, but it didn't.

One can't just ignore what has been changed. It's exactly what fucked this movie, since JJ couldn't accept what Rian had changed in his vision and had to fit multiple movies worth of plot to get it back. It's really like JJ didn't accept the chosen one prophecy and pretended it didn't exist. We know from the Mortis episodes in TCW that it did.

[Akasha64]

You're literally the opposite of correct here - it's the only Star Wars film WITHOUT soul

- - - Updated - - -

I'm gonna say it - Calling yourself Skywalker when you have literally no connection to any Skywalker is weirdchamp

Cause she considered Luke and Leia the closest thing to a mother/father to her after her parents died. They had a close connection (supposedly...the movies don't go far enough to show that though). It's weird, but justifiable.

[Sanguinerd]

They told you who made it in the film...

Yes which was a bloody nice coincidence, just like how Rey just happened to stand in the correct spot. They could've approached from any direction but nah.. why bother

Some crackpot Sith has a vision of the future and decides to forge a lame dagger lmao

Not to mention they found the dagger BY ACCIDENT

[Shadowferal]

Feeling the dark side of the Force here.

The tasty tasty hate...

[Fayolynn]

The prequels, where he had total control, were fucking awful. The new movies are miles better than the prequels, even episode 9 which is the weakest of the 3.

Sorry but no. I will take a trilogy with bad dialog and dated graphics with a good continuous story over one with zero directions whose only accomplishments are undoing and retconing the past just to return everything to wear it was from the start.

[Akasha64]

One thing I have to say about this new trilogy is they didn't expand on the Jedi mythos. Hate on the prequels all you want, but they introduced a lot of Jedi concepts and mythology that we use to this day, such as Master/Padawan system, the Jedi High Council, and the Sith as a concept (ancient enemy of the Jedi).

The sequel trilogy references the Jedi mythos, but expands on it barely if at all.

[Monster Hunter]

The main issues are...

1) him being alive undermines he end of RotJ.
2) nothing was set up regarding him returning in the previous 2 films. He comes out of nowhere to go raaaawr i'm the bad guy then dies almost as fast.

Do they at least try to reckon it up with the chosen one prophesy?

I mean the whole story of anakin/vader is him bringing balance to the force by ending the jedi and the sith.

But then I guess the whole last 3 episodes haven't made much sense in that regard.

Also where did the first order even come from. I haven't seen the latest one but is that addressed?

[Monster Hunter]

I mean, sure. Anakin's redemption was part of the point. But you don't get to decide what's important or not. Clearly Vader/Anakin killing Palpatine, the evil Emperor he put into power mattered to many people. Yes, him surviving doesn't ruin Anakin's redemption per se but it does take away from the satisfaction the original end of this story had and for what exactly? Just so they could milk one more old character?

You can't tell me that Palpatine surviving Vader, Luke, Han and Leia doesn't detract from the end of Episode 6. They probably even knew this and decided to go for it anyways because they obviously had no idea where to go with these movies apart from reinvoking nostalgia with updated visuals. Watching this franchise cannibalize itself for some cheap moments is just disgusting.

Wasn't like the whole point of the story about the prophesy that anakin was the chosen one who would bring balance to the force by ending the jedi and sith?

[Voidism]

I have barely read the thread and I haven't watched the movie, but giving any movie a 0 seems a bit exaggerated.

[Sanguinerd]

Do they at least try to reckon it up with the chosen one prophesy?

I mean the whole story of anakin/vader is him bringing balance to the force by ending the jedi and the sith.

But then I guess the whole last 3 episodes haven't made much sense in that regard.

Also where did the first order even come from. I haven't seen the latest one but is that addressed?

They do not. Anakins story has been made useless. He didn't bring balance because Palpatine didn't die. The movie does say Luke WAS aware of this but didn't do anything either.

And TFA just states from the ashes of the Empire the First Order rises or some shit, despite the Republic being around and in power. They just let it happen.

What's also weird is why the First Order even bothered with Starkiller Base considering planet destroying cannons got fitted onto those new fancy Star Destroyers.

It's all just shite.

[oplawlz]

None of these people are Kathleen Kennedy, which is the point. Seriously, it's like blaming the Weinsteins for any of the flops they made. She is not a creative. She is an executive. She hired people who are generally considered competent, and she ushered the movie to release, while acting as its spokesperson. She may have some blame in not forcing a collaboration between the directors, but the directors knew each other and also didn't try and collaborate with each other.

But blaming her for the shitty writing is hilarious, at best.

She holds complete blame for not ensuring that a basic plot wasn't outlined for all three movies before the first even started shooting. You don't write a trilogy, specifically a trilogy that has 6 movies worth of continuity to consider, one at a time.

[Fayolynn]

Cause she considered Luke and Leia the closest thing to a mother/father to her after her parents died. They had a close connection (supposedly...the movies don't go far enough to show that though). It's weird, but justifiable.

But you are wrong because Han was more of a father figure to her then Luke so if anything she should have taken his name. If you want to make the Leia argument that falls apart too because Leia was raised an Organa and married a Solo. Its a huge stretch that of those 3 names Skywalker is the one she would pick. Its a nonsense bullshit choice.

[TheramoreIsTheBomb]

7,8 & 9 are uncanon to me. I don’t give a damn. Rebels was better than this. The Mandalorian. Rogue One. This movie was soooooo rushed. 2 hours and 22 minutes wasn’t enough. In fact they would need another movie to finish this off properly AND redeem the sequels. For the actors and actresses: I am so sorry. Especially to Daisy Ridley and Mark Hamil