I think this perfectly highlights a running theme in this thread. People are assuming that their experiences have been the norm and refusing to look at the systems from another point of view.
Those of you who have been playing throughout BFA almost uninterrupted are of the opinion that you can level the HOA up naturally through just doing what you do. It's easy to dismiss the HOA levels entirely when you're already where you should be without needing to make an intentional effort to level it up. I do see your points of view, and even agree with them, but your experiences don't align with everybody elses.
The systems look very different if you're a returning player. An RL friend of mine jumped back in this weekend after not playing for about a year. His HOA was level 21 when he logged back in. Even with the quest to immediately bump it up to level 35, he's still got a ways to go before he can use all the traits on the ~iLevel 430 ish gear he's managed to cobble together over the weekend. And a hell of a lot more besides getting hold of all the required essences.
It looks wildly different if you're a PvPer, who is forced to complete PvE reps, WQ's and such for the essences to be able to compete with players who do have that extra power.
I usually manage to fit in ~6 or so hours of WoW in a week, and in that time I'd really like to get some raids done. I also frequently have to take time away due to RL matters. So I've got to constantly maximise any AP gains in order to be able to do that due to how little time I get to spend with the game relative to others, as well as find the time for Visions, Daily quests, Rep grinds, Essences and so on. To me, the systems are a constant obligation I need to meet in order to get the enjoyment I want out of the game. Honestly, it's all getting to be a little too much for me to be able to handle.
So whilst some players have been able to keep their HOA up to date, collect essences and rep and so on through their regular play and do so at a pace that keeps their relative power level equal to the rest of the community at large, others have been left behind.
While there is a catch up mechanism in place, it requires you to participate in content that is perhaps irrelevent to your in game goals and interests. In that situation it's easy to see why the players it affects would consider it to be a grind - It's an artificial time barrier that's keeping them away from doing the content they actually play the game for. It's fine saying "Just do 3 Islands a week". That may not be something that others have any interest in. It could well be somebody elses entire WoW Weekend just doing Islands.
I'm not assuming that my points of view match up with others experiences. But I would like you to at least consider the fact that not everyone in the same situtation as you are, and that different players have different in game goals they want to achieve. A little bit of perspective would make this thread a much more constructive discussion.