Romantic Relationship: Head or Heart?

[Unholyground]

Are you always interested in romantic relationships with your best friends? Personally, I'm not - most of my best friends are people who I was not attracted at all to.

If you are not best friends with your significant other you will not make it plain and simple.

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This is like the surest way of not getting a romantic relationship.

Or to be more fair, it's more akin to people who "work" in their respective dream fields. It's a minority.

For most people who have best friends, as soon as they become that, they've long been set aside as potential sexual & romantic targets

So you don't want your spouse to be your best friend and lover? That is how it lasts.

[Grimbold21]

If you are not best friends with your significant other you will not make it plain and simple.

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So you don't want your spouse to be your best friend and lover? That is how it lasts.

That's not what your initial post suggested, which was what I replied to.

That more often than not, when you're best friends with someone you lose any romantic/sexual intention or interest towards that person.

I haven't had that many girl best friends, but as soon as they hit that level, I couldn't see myself sexually attracted to them

[Unholyground]

That's not what your initial post suggested, which was what I replied to.

That more often than not, when you're best friends with someone you lose any romantic/sexual intention or interest towards that person.

I haven't had that many girl best friends, but as soon as they hit that level, I couldn't see myself sexually attracted to them

I have had a few, all of which we were attracted to each other, and then I married one of them after 9 years.

[Katchii]

Both.

Need to have your heart in it for it to be meaningful, but you need to use your head to watch for and actually recognize red flags so you're heart doesn't get broken or shredded later.

[Dwarfhamster]

It’s a combination of both. And to claim choosing both is dodging the question is pretty stupid, limiting, and immature. There are more than two ways to think about a question and if your mind can’t conceptualize that, I don’t know what to say.

Your emotions may lead you somewhere first but your logic kicks in soon after to determine if the person is a good fit. It’s a balancing of both.

[Jotaux]

Making decisions with my heart has always let me down.

[Sorshen]

How about a mix of both?

[Powerogue]

Both or it's going to die.

Trust me, I'm 26 and have never dated.

[Shadowferal]

Always a bit of both.
That's why trust and love need to be both present.

[meheez]

Your head is just reflecting on what you are feeling. This is not math class.

Everyone has different standarts.

Some people are rational, some are emotional.

It's about how fast you trust other to lose some control.

[TigTone]

Like others have said both.

Relationships take a lot of work to maintain but the end results is a partner for life to face whatever life throws at both of you.

[PC2]

I'd say use your heart/emotions initially to decide who you are physically attracted to but then prioritize your head/reason when it comes to a permanent arrangement like marriage or kids.

[Zaktar]

It’s a combination of both. And to claim choosing both is dodging the question is pretty stupid, limiting, and immature. There are more than two ways to think about a question and if your mind can’t conceptualize that, I don’t know what to say.

Your emotions may lead you somewhere first but your logic kicks in soon after to determine if the person is a good fit. It’s a balancing of both.

Insults aside, it is dodging the question. As I've said, obviously both are involved - they have to be - but the point of asking is that there is no such thing as a perfect 50/50 split. One has to have a stronger influence, and that's what I'm asking.

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I'd say use your heart/emotions initially to decide who you are physically attracted to but then prioritize your head/reason when it comes to a permanent arrangement like marriage or kids.

That's a thoughtful breakdown.

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Both or it's going to die.

Trust me, I'm 26 and have never dated.

Is that true? Can I ask why, if so?