I know exactly what you're talking about. Yes the WoW NPC Bud was funny and the whole WoW community all think 110% he was supposed to be gay but his over-the-top flamboyance was something that all my LGBT friends who play WoW thought was annoying. As a gay man, I welcome inclusive characters to video games that may be different than the typical cisgender heteronormative but when we see characters (confirmed or assumed to be) portrayed as "gay" that are a caricature of a gay/trans person, it gets annoying and often times offensive. I, like your friends, are pretty fucking average. IRL I'm not overtly masculine but I'm not overtly fem either. I'm just who I am and don't care if people think I'm girlie or gay based on how I'm acting. If a person just saw me standing in public they would not get the "gay vibe" from me. Hell I wear shorts & sandals year round (have the foot tan lines to prove it too lol) because they're comfortable to me.
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See that one I didn't get any "gay vibes" from at all. I saw it as two males showing platonic affection for each other. Outside of Korea or Japan (honestly can't remember which one male friend PDA is a commonplace in) male affection is interpreted as "they're gay". Telling another male "I love you" or hugging or holding hands is non-existent because it is seen as a thing men don't do. Hell men showing feelings or emotions for their on sons are typically not done because that's "how men act". The whole "man up" line given to boys when they cry is a perfect example of it. Tholo and Anren just seemed like more progressive thinking men who had no issues showing how they feel about the other in a friendship way.