Note from her majesty to the USA

[Stuffs]

For fuck sakes people its a joke thread, get the stick out of your ass
I got a chuckle out of a few of them myself

[JPR776]

I will spell it colour, labour, armour, and such the day you learn to pronounce melee properly.

I'd also have to insist that they either start spelling it "shedule" or pronounce the damned "c", and that they restore all the poor "the's" they've carelessly dropped from phrases like "in hospital" and "at university."

Also, if we are to rejoin some European nation, I'd prefer it be one whose cuisine doesn't rely so heavily on boiled organ meat.

As to the idea of "British humour," I have only two words: Benny Hill.

All in all, I'd have to warn the Brits: don't get fiesty, here; any more talk like this, and we'll send over something you're really terrified of: dentists.

[Dsjalja]

We call it Happy Hour as we slam down a few COLD ones down at Joes Bar & Grill in big fat mugs.

Your COLD ones which i assume are Budweisers, dont you dare call that beer. Its cold water with a hint of beer in it.

[Keilith]

That picture from "god knows where" is from wikipedia, it has a lot of sources that are a lot more reputable than bloggers websites you are posting.

Wiki the same place where anyone can edit right?

Butthurt american right here getting all serious over a fake letter lols.
More hilarious then the actual letter itself hahahahahahahahhaahha

Someone missed the point entirely.

Great post. Even as an American, I found this hilarious. Cheers!

A few people who cant use google, Neither of you realize I simply posted the rest of the post he got the letter from do you?

[DasHuntard]

im still having a good lol over here

[Keilith]

Your COLD ones which i assume are Budweisers, dont you dare call that beer. Its cold water with a hint of beer in it.

I prefer microbrews locally thank you.

[Amsden]

#11 is practically declaring war ROFL.
The only tea worth drinking is properly made Iced Tea.
#4 not happening
#6 HAHA no,

Luckily I'm Texan and Britain never had any claim of Texas.

That list made me realize how lucky I am to not be associated with the UK in any way. Thanks for opening my eyes :P

[Stuffs]

A few people who cant use google, Neither of you realize I simply posted the rest of the post he got the letter from do you?

I like the part about guns and therapy. Britain has about 10 times as many violent crimes as usa. Seems someone else needs some therapy.


I also make a promise to all of you. I will spell it colour, labour, armour, and such the day you learn to pronounce melee properly.

Thats what people are refering to, there is no god damned rhyme or reason to this

I give up, at least I had fun with the OP

[Humungo]

We need to get on the metric system with the rest of the world.

A response from the people of America.


Dear Queenie,

Get over yourself!

The only thing you can "assume" here is, we the US of A, can STILL kick your ass, only now we can do it on your turf.... what's left of it anyway.

I was mildly amused by your new rules, especially how you want us to start spelling and pronouncing words like we're simultaneously examining our own prostrate.

And I guess I can understand how all those fireworks we shoot off on our Independence Day wrecks havoc of that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder you picked up way back in the 1770's. Maybe you NEED a pshrink.

As for our guns, we actually have a few dolts of our own that want to take them away too. We call them "Liberals" and since you actually have a political Party for them over there, we'll ship them to you. All of them. Gladly. Oh and by the way, send us what ever guns you confiscate over there. We'll put 'em to good use here.

Since you folks live on an island smaller than half our states, I'm sure the concept of an Interstate Highway system has never occurred to you. And why should it? After all you've been driving around in circles (you call them "roundabouts") on the wrong side of the road all these years. Let us, and the virtually the rest of the globe, clue you confused folks in a secret here. They call it the RIGHT side of the road for for a reason!

The English should never lecture ANYONE about food. EVER!

Most of your new rules have been mildly homorous.. That is until you decreed that we would start having to drink that hot camel piss you dolts call beer. If you think we were pissed off over tea, just try screwing with our suds and you'll REALLY make us mad! And you DONT want to make us mad...just ask the Japs.

It appears you don't like listening to our actors attempting to sound like they are simultaneously giving themselves an anal examination in movies huh? GOOD. Make your own damn movies for a change. But try doing so OUTSIDE of that same glorified barn you keep shooting those Bond movies in would ya!

Dont like our football either I see. Well, why don't you try doing something about your soccer hooligans first and then come tell us about violence. As for baseball, we kinda like that game. It takes a great deal of skill to hit a 90mph fast ball or a wicked curve which is something you folks couldnt handle 'cause you're still rolling the damned ball up like you're serving it up to a two year old. And whats with that name "Cricket" anyway?



Lee Harvey Oswald killed JFK. But I can understand your suspicious nature about these things. After all, the entire world knows the KBG had its own Resident Station inside your MI-5.

I'm pretty sure what ever back taxes you think we owe you pales in monetary comparison to the amount you still owe US in that lend lease deal that saved your ungrateful asses back in 1939 & '40.

Daily tea huh? How quaint. We call it Happy Hour as we slam down a few COLD ones down at Joes Bar & Grill in big fat mugs. And we'll leave that limp wristed crumpets and strwberries served cup-n-saucers to you panty-wastes while we was down our Cheeseburgers and Freedom Fries.

Really, you went there? You took this seriously, went there, and said something that makes you look well... I wont say it but you don't look good. That you didn't realize the nature of the First post is nothing short of amazing. Great job, and BTW don't answer for me or anyone else... ever.

[Deleted]

some people really need to learn what a joke is...... but nice op =)

[videotape]

You misspelled "color."

[Faenskap]

Learn to use the metric system, please It makes talking about things like speed and hight so easier. I thought it was a fun letter.

[Keilith]

Really, you went there? You took this seriously, went there, and said something that makes you look well... I wont say it but you don't look good. That you didn't realize the nature of the First post is nothing short of amazing. Great job, and BTW don't answer for me or anyone else... ever.

Since I said it once and it seems to be overlooked.

http://tinyurl.com/3rrz2d5

There you go for all the lazy people.

[I stand in fire]

<OP snip>

And the american revolution begins again.

[Rezusian]

As for baseball, we kinda like that game. It takes a great deal of skill to hit a 90mph fast ball or a wicked curve which is something you folks couldnt handle 'cause you're still rolling the damned ball up like you're serving it up to a two year old. And whats with that name "Cricket" anyway?

Wut... cricket balls are bowled at 90mph, usually at the body, you have less than half a second to react, sometimes it goes straight at your head... fun stuff bro.

[llDemonll]

It was meant as a fun joke; we can't have nice things because people are taking jokes too seriously. This was posted in Fun Stuff, not Serious Stuff