Depressed after 20th birthday

[marikae]

What a depressing thread

It gets better, it gets worse. It seems to be fairly normal to lose touch with high school friends, the same with losing touch with primary school friends. Parents are bound to get older (hopefully), just as everyone else will.

I believe there are multiple stages in life where you can get stuck and feel depressed;
- Going from primary school to high school
- Going from high school to university (or direct to a job, or to nothing for a time)
- Going your first job
- The point where you wonder why you bother doing the same work for years on end
- The point where you wonder if you'll ever buy a house, find a partner for life, have children, be able to afford children
- The midlife crisis point where you have a mortgage, dealing with a wife/husband, supporting children
- Etc.

Welcome to life, there are bad times and good times. For whatever reason you may be going through a bad time, accept it but don't let it ruin you, it tends to get better (that or you gain a much better understanding of what a bad time can really be).

[Deleted]

As soon as you're working you won't have time to feel sorry for yourself.

DAT SLAVE SPIRIT !!
Oh wait So flagrant.

[Deleted]

Tell that to the people with incurable diseases. Tell that to people who wake up with pain every morning. Tell that to people who have to take medication against depression. That it's all just in their head.

i have 2 incurable diseases my self, wich one is going to one day kill me.
i have pain everyday and need to eat 5 diffrent meds each day.
i have been depressed becuse of all of this, but is not amymore.
Its all in your head.

[semaphore]

Somehow I had a Pandaren before my eyes when I read that. And it wasn't my avatar.

Lol. I didn't realise till you brought it up XD

[Deleted]

I got the same feeling when i turnt 22. Stuff start getting serious, it's when I started my Master's degree and started realizing that in the end of the program I'll have to find a proper job and start thinking a bit different. Plus that you start feeling nostalgia about the school years. Oh well, it's not necessarily bad that everything starts feeling more serious.

Just the fact that you start thinking all those things, it is a good thing. Find ways to enjoy your life with your new given parameters

[Deleted]

So if you get cancer or you are a victim of a horrible crime, you lose your job and your wife/children.........so that was all because you didn't want it to be easy. All those starving babies in Africa wanted it the hard way....

Cmon, does someone REALLY believe that? Positive thinking is bullshit and has never been proven to work. Some people get lucky and use opportunity and some bite the dust quite soon or never get that opportunity. Life is a lot about luck, where you are born, what kind of parents you have etc.

There is no such thing as luck. What you are saying is that its fate that decides if you will feel good or not. And thats a load of bullshit.
Weak people blame Fate, God, The State and Parents - strong people make their own good life.

And i bever said people that have bad things happen in their lifa wanted it.
What i say is that you can look at anything that happens in your life and see it as bad or not.

"Positive thinking is bullshit and has never been proven to work."
lol what? If you think positive you become positive and feel better.
if you think negative you become negativa and feel bad - this is not rocketsience

[Daedius]

Old at 20? Pft, you're just entering your prime..!

[Deleted]

i have 2 incurable diseases my self, wich one is going to one day kill me.
i have pain everyday and need to eat 5 diffrent meds each day.
i have been depressed becuse of all of this.
Its all in your head.

What a strange coincidence. Assuming you're really speaking the truth, the diseases and the pain, they're only in your head? So with the right attitude they'll go away?

[xicoia]

I found the same bug in life, the only difference is that I'm 18.

[Deleted]

What i say is that you can look at anything that happens in your life and see it as bad or not.

So you would say that if someone gets Aids it's not a bad thing?

[Gilian]

It's normal. Wait till you get a job, you'll blink and find a year went by. Enjoy the early years of Uni, you'll regret it if you don't.

The older you get the faster time seems to go. I already notice it at the age of 28. The years fly by.
I saw on discovery that once you are around the age of 60 or whatever time seems to go 2,5 (or something like that, can't really remember the numbers) times faster than when you were 15.

[theWocky]

First, hi MMO-Champ! I've lurked here for a while, being a WoW and Diablo player and finally decided to register.

Anyway, the problem is that I had my 20th birthday in September, as well as a lot of changes in my life and I've been feeling increasingly nostalgic, even depressed after that. I thought it would pass but it's actually getting worse. I don't even know what it is. Maybe it's that I dont want to accept being a grown up now or maybe it's because I took a year off college after the first year because I didn't like my specialty and I'm planning to reapply next year. It could even be because I renovated my room during summer from the money I made working and dug up a lot of old things, photos, mementos, childhood dolls or even because I lost touch with nearly all my high school friends. Oh and I forgot the most important part. My parents were in their late 30s/early 40s when they had me and my dad just had hes 60th birthday and they're starting to look kind of frail.

This is starting to really bother me as I feel.. old at 20 and I don't know if that's normal. Has anyone gone through something like that?

Heck, I'm 41 in September and still don't feel old :P

Relax, mate, best times in my life were 25~35

[Pull My Finger]

First, hi MMO-Champ! I've lurked here for a while, being a WoW and Diablo player and finally decided to register.

Anyway, the problem is that I had my 20th birthday in September, as well as a lot of changes in my life and I've been feeling increasingly nostalgic, even depressed after that. I thought it would pass but it's actually getting worse. I don't even know what it is. Maybe it's that I dont want to accept being a grown up now or maybe it's because I took a year off college after the first year because I didn't like my specialty and I'm planning to reapply next year. It could even be because I renovated my room during summer from the money I made working and dug up a lot of old things, photos, mementos, childhood dolls or even because I lost touch with nearly all my high school friends. Oh and I forgot the most important part. My parents were in their late 30s/early 40s when they had me and my dad just had hes 60th birthday and they're starting to look kind of frail.

This is starting to really bother me as I feel.. old at 20 and I don't know if that's normal. Has anyone gone through something like that?

I started to feel that kind of diffuse nostalgia pretty early as well. I mean, my current life is OK more or less, much more than it has been in the past years - I went to college at the age of 30 and finally found the nerve to make something out of my artistic talents instead of staying stuck in retail and warehouse jobs for the rest of my life. I'm a pretty solidified and serene person nowadays, not the angry and clueless mess I used to be when I was 24 or something.

But there is a really strong feeling of nostalgia, almost painful at times - I guess I kinda remember life how it was back then, in the 90ies. Maybe it's because the world has changed so much so rapidly, especially during the last decade. I have the feeling that entertainment was way cooler back then. Much more innocent in a way and also way more original. Everything's so redundant and worn today. Everyone's so opinionated.

The whole internet, connectivity, smartphone, social network, digital age craze freaks the hell out of me. I notice how I miss the times where you could exist normally without having a feeling of lack when you don't have something on or around you that connects you to some bigger, omnipresent thing all the time.

The pace of life was much more laid-back, easygoing, sane back then. All in all, everything about our way of life and society today is so strangely burdened and jaded. It REALLY was different in 1992. I guess I kind of spent my 20ies in some kind of a blur and now that I'm suddenly able to reconnect with myself after all these years, I'm kind of shocked how much has actually changed. It's kind of alienating.

And yes, I think I really do miss being a kid and the mindset and perception of the world that comes with it. But to be honest: I think one should preserve that, even if it's kind of depressing sometimes. You don't ever get that back. But it also kind of keeps you sane, and reminds you of what this is all about. Somewhere in this feeling of nostalgic longing, there's a piece of yourself that doesn't always come through the barrage of today's stream of information, the expectations, everyday duties, the worries etc. People get so caught up with everyday life and it's antics. A lot of folks don't even reflect over that any more.

If nothing else, this nostalgic feeling also serves as a reminder. That you should do and occupy yourself with stuff that you will be able to nostalgically look back at in the future. To make something valuable and lasting of the moment. Make something more out of the now, basically. Normal life doesn't really allow you to do that, you gotta bring that in yourself. In this sense: enjoy your college time and do stuff that's really COOL and kicks you. You'll never have the opportunity again once you're fully immersed in the economy wheel.

[Deleted]

What a strange coincidence. Assuming you're really speaking the truth, the diseases and the pain, they're only in your head? So with the right attitude they'll go away?

No they dont go away, i never said they will.
But i refuse to be depressed, feel bad or stop me from doing anything i want with my life.
Im happy and enjoy living the life i have and make sure to do all the things i want to do and not sit at home and feel sorry for myself - like i see many many sick and not sick people do over bullshit things.

Beeing dperessed, feeling sorry for yourself, blaming god, fate and parents has never made anyone feel better and it is - All in your head.

[Deleted]

No they dont go away, i never said they will.
But i refuse to be depressed, feel bad or stop me from doing anything i want with my life.
Im happy and enjoy living the life i have and make sure to do all the things i want to do and not sit at home and feel sorry for myself - like i see many many sick and not sick people do over bullshit things.

Beeing dperessed, feeling sorry for yourself, blaming god, fate and parents has never made anyone feel better and it is - All in your head.

You say you refuse to be depressed, but for some people it's not that easy as pulling a switch. Some people need medication to even be able to get up in the morning.

[Deleted]

So you would say that if someone gets Aids it's not a bad thing?

I knew two people that are now dead becuse of aids.
None of them let it stop them from living full lifes and haveing fun.
Ofc they would have prefered to not have aids - but they did not sit and sulk or let ot bring them down.
So yes, its a decision. If you want to be ok with ot and have a good life anyeay you can. They could, wich means anyone can.

---------- Post added 2012-11-26 at 11:58 AM ----------

You say you refuse to be depressed, but for some people it's not that easy as pulling a switch. Some people need medication to even be able to get up in the morning.

Yes some people need meds, But alot of the people that eat meds do not need them.
Most could do without but have choosen to eat meds anyway.

And for the huge majority of people that feel bad but not so much they need meds it is just to pull a switch.
But its easier to just keep feeling bad instead of taking responsibilty and make yourself feel better.

[Deleted]

Dont let it get you down, everyone has these moments occasionally. I'm recently graduated, and I have all the time in the world to dwell on my thoughts (along with the many other unemployed grads), and I have had moments when I have been bummed out thinking about how great the past was.

It took me time to realize that I only get like this whenever I have too much time on my hands. Find something interesting, be it a project or sport that you can enjoy in your free time. I go to the gym 3-4 times a week now among other things, and I have recently finished building my first computer which I found to be a really great achievement.

Enjoy your time at university, you will soon have plenty more free time when you graduate, and hopefully like me you will be able to look back at those times fondly.

[Iceman2500]

The older you get the faster time seems to go. I already notice it at the age of 28. The years fly by.
I saw on discovery that once you are around the age of 60 or whatever time seems to go 2,5 (or something like that, can't really remember the numbers) times faster than when you were 15.

I'll bet that part of that has to do with the majority of life's milestones occuring early in our lives:

• When you first become a teenager, you can't wait to hit 16 to get your driver's license and time seems to move slowly.
• When you hit 16, you can't wait to turn 18 to become a legal adult and time seems to move slowly.
• When you hit 18, you can't wait to turn 21 so you can legally buy booze and gamble at casinos and time seems to move slowly.

Once you hit 21, you realize that there's NOTHING to look forward to for another 40+ years, at which point you're eligible for retirement and senior discounts......and time seems to speed up.

[starkey]

20 years old and your like acting if life has passed you by, holy crap the computer generation its your own damn fault get out there and do something about it

[Deleted]

I knew two people that are now dead becuse of aids.
None of them let it stop them from living full lifes and haveing fun.
Ofc they would have prefered to not have aids - but they did not sit and sulk or let ot bring them down.
So yes, its a decision. If you want to be ok with ot and have a good life anyeay you can. They could, wich means anyone can.

---------- Post added 2012-11-26 at 11:58 AM ----------


Yes some people need meds, But alot of the people that eat meds do not need them.
Most could do without but have choosen to eat meds anyway.

And for the huge majority of people that feel bad but not so much they need meds it is just to pull a switch.
But its easier to just keep feeling bad instead of taking responsibilty and make yourself feel better.

Yeah those people want to feel bad, it's all their fault.