How To Find a Female Friend

[Peso]

These days it is very common for someone to ask for advice on how to find a girl friend or boy friend. Whether people search on YouTube for "advice" or if it's on how to sites they're all bad advice. My question is how do you find a girl friend these days and if you're a female then how do you find a boy friend? Society is always changing in many ways and we need to learn new ways to change with society for us to look good these days. The problem is some of us don't know how to find that right person.

Do you have any advice for someone that has never had a girl friend before? Where can you go to meet someone? How do you find the confidence within yourself to approach a girl? How do you know if she's into you? I'm sure many of us asked these questions before at least once. For some people high school wasn't fun and we really didn't meet much people. Finding that person to love and take care of is hard.

Anyways I want to know if you have a girl friend and if you do how did you meet her. Is there anything to watch out for? Any stories that would be interesting from high school or college you'd like to share? Any advice would be appreciated and I'm looking forward to seeing the poll results. Thank you for reading if you read the entire post and have a great day.

[Funt Case]

Best advice is don't go searching for it. Live your normal daily life, go where you usually go, do what you usually do. That way you meet a girl/boy in a place you visit or have hobbies at, and a good chance they're interested in the same area. Also makes it easier to make small talk and plan activity's if it goes well. This gives people the illusion that you have confidence (if you don't) since you know what you like and where you like to go and have a sense of direction.

[Wildo]

Best advice is don't go searching for it. Live your normal daily life, go where you usually go, do what you usually do. That way you meet a girl/boy in a place you visit or have hobbies at, and a good chance they're interested in the same area. Also makes it easier to make small talk and plan activity's if it goes well. This gives people the illusion that you have confidence (if you don't) since you know what you like and where you like to go and have a sense of direction.

Loads of wisdom here.

[Skizo]

This is extremely anecdotal of course:
Get to a point in your life where you are happy before you get into a serious relationship, or you risk becoming dependent on the other person for happiness.
If you aren't willing to compromise the choices in the long term future for the sake of being with another person, make sure the other person understands on some level. If they think that you're going to move mountains to be with them, it can hurt them really badly.

I'm enjoying my freedom right now. Not looking for anything serious. I figure that part where you get freaked out and start looking for someone to marry isn't supposed to happen until your early 30's

[Dhurn]

I've only ever met people through school, in discussion classes there's opportunity to get to know someone you may have similar interests with. Above all I'd avoid looking for someone through work, things can get complicated and it's a real shame to lose a good job because of it. $15/hour gardening on oceanfront property, how I miss thee.

[Brubear]

I have a girlfriend. I met her at work and was introduced to her by her cousin, who I also work with. Though she was the aggressive one and made the first move since I had moved states and half a year removed from a four year relationship with a co-dependent, alcoholic, emotional vampire of a bitch (and I'm being nice here) so I wasn't looking to be in a relationship. Personally I agree with the person above who said that you shouldn't be searching but instead should be living your life and trying to improve your life till you are happy and in a good place by yourself since that will get the attention of those around you and will cause you to react more favorably towards others.

However, right here is ALL the advice you need to meet a girl; http://www.doctornerdlove.com/

Seriously, go through and read the shit out of that website. I've passed that link on to a lot of my friends who were always the lonely nerd suffering from White Knight syndrome and all of them have a MUCH better outlook on life and are a hell of a lot happier now, even the ones who are still single. Seriously, I can't stress how awesome the advice of that guy is.

[Toffie]

I turn every girl i meet down, I wont have a relationship untill i sort my future out. I'd love to have good job and a wife and kids. No reason rushing this early.

[Deleted]

I have a boyfriend (fiance) We met on WoW kind of silly but yeah
We were in the same guild for 2 years never interacted then he left for the top guild on the server and some others then eventually i went there too
Then we both quit as the guild disbanded i went to horde he randomly did too ( but not because of eachother as we werent friends )
Then we became friends after we noticed eachother on the other side! and things went on from there. that was almost 3 years ago.

We both didn't really look for anything it just happend. I'm from Holland and he's from the UK though he's living with me in Holland now. since 2 months ago.

I don't have much of a clue how to find a boyfriend either i'm generally a shy person that doesen't make the first move ever.
I guess we got along because we had the same interest (gaming)

As there wasn't an option for boyfriend or engaged i just chose i'm married as its closest to being engaged =/

[DeltrusDisc]

I turn every girl i meet down, I wont have a relationship untill i sort my future out. I'd love to have good job and a wife and kids. No reason rushing this early.

I'd actually advise against this. It's good to date as a form of practice. It teaches you A LOT, both about yourself - and others.

[Dembai]

Female, Married.

You know, I tried to play the game. I tried out the drama of it all, I thought that the stupid romantic comedies were how things worked, and you know, I really realized that wasn't me.
So how did I get the man I wanted? I asked him out. I asked him to go steady. I asked him about going all the way before doing so. I asked him to marry me.

Wait, what?

You want a girl or guy? You want to know if s/he likes you? You want to know if s/he digs you? You want to know if second base is okay? You want to know if things are really serious?

ASK.

"But what if s/he rejects me?!!?"

Is wondering and stressing and crying yourself to sleep every night BETTER than finding out?

Stop torturing yourself, grow some balls (yes girls, you too), and ASK THE QUESTIONS.

[Tsuna]

It fills me with laughter that I was allowed to select Forever Alone for this poll. No girlfriend here, though I've found in college it's much easier to talk to girls in general than it was in high school, guess that comes with being marginally more mature than back then.

[Cephilia]

Best advice is don't go searching for it. Live your normal daily life, go where you usually go, do what you usually do. That way you meet a girl/boy in a place you visit or have hobbies at, and a good chance they're interested in the same area. Also makes it easier to make small talk and plan activity's if it goes well. This gives people the illusion that you have confidence (if you don't) since you know what you like and where you like to go and have a sense of direction.

This pretty much. Met my other half on WoW. After few weeks of small talk and chatting about the game and stuff like that I realized that I'm quite interested in this person and maybe even meeting irl.

[Authary]

Best advice is don't go searching for it. Live your normal daily life, go where you usually go, do what you usually do. That way you meet a girl/boy in a place you visit or have hobbies at, and a good chance they're interested in the same area. Also makes it easier to make small talk and plan activity's if it goes well. This gives people the illusion that you have confidence (if you don't) since you know what you like and where you like to go and have a sense of direction.

This is pure, unadulterated bullshit.

If you happen not to be one of those incredibly annoying extraverts and you have hobbies that do not include large groups of people you won't meet anyone. Have fun trying to find a girlfriend once you're not a student anymore and your hobbies include video games (which should be pretty common on these forums) and other kind of indoor activities. If, on top of that, you dislike parties and large "social" gatherings with so much noise that the social part is pretty much nonexistent you won't meet anyone new.

If your normal daily life hasn't given you a girlfriend for some time it won't magically change. You'll have to provoke it. Dating sites can work...

[Deleted]

Things aren't usually delivered to your doorstep free of charge. This goes for life partners just as much as it does for work or good health. If you listen to someone telling you "not to look for love" or not to be proactive, then don't expect to ever get anything, period.

If you want to get into a relationship, then you have to put yourself out there. You have to work at it. If you have no need to work for it because you were born lucky, beautiful and a platinum spoon up your ass, then you're not looking for advice on how to get a relationship going.

[Spectral]

I met the current girlfriend at work. We hung out as friends for a few months, then it clicked. I met the previous serious girlfriend at work also; I worked closely with her lab, thought she was super cute, and when I went to a Christmas party at her professor's house, I made sure I talked to her a lot. I asked her out on a date, and we clicked pretty much immediately. It was pretty funny that she didn't really realize that the first date was a date - thought it was just friendly, since she was a few years older than me and apparently that's unusual where she was from.

[Seirith]

I am female, 29 and married. I found my husband on yahoo. One night when I was 14 I was searching for people that liked animals, anime and video games. He came up on one of my searches and I sent him a message because he lived in NY like I did. After emailing him back and forth for a week I told my parents. I then found out he was 18. My parents were NOT happy but after emailing for about a month they let me meet at the local mall. My parents brought me and picked me back up two hours later. We were both shy and it was pretty awkward.

A week later he asked me out and I said yes. By that time I had turned 15. We would meet at the mall or his house once a week for 4 hours until I was 16.5 and got my own car. After that I was allowed to go to his house twice a week by myself and had to be home by 10pm. When I turned 18 I got a FT job and could see him whenever I wanted, he also asked me to marry him. My parents were NOT happy and thought I was much too young and not ready to be married. I knew I was ready.

We moved out together for the first time when I was 21 and got married when I was 22. Now we have been together 14 years and are still happy. My parents also love him now and see that we are happy together.

[theredviola]

I hear chloroform works well.

[Kisho]

However, right here is ALL the advice you need to meet a girl; http://www.doctornerdlove.com/

Just re-stating this. Yes, that website is amazing. Read it, love it. It's perfect.

As for my personal stories? I've had 3 girlfriends across my lifetime (a couple more... 'liasons', but we're talking serious relationships here so). First was someone I met online, through a Yu-Gi-Oh website (I know, laugh away, it gets funnier). It was a small community of people who traded cards, played the game online, etc. I started dating her and things were good. To start. Then it got weird.

As in, she thought she was posessed by the spirit of Seto Kaibah's sister (who doesn't exist in the TV series, fyi) weird. =/

So yeah I moved on fairly quickly after that!

Second girlfriend was someone I met in College, and it was the unfortunate (yet common) story of us starting dating, then realising we're better off as friends. I admit that she came to that conclusion before I did, and I spent a while being all emo and shit, but hey. We started dating because our friends were pushing me into confessing my feelings for her, so I did. Didn't work out but it's all good.

Third girlfriend was a lot more serious: I helped start an Anime society at my University and she joined it. We got talking, everyone made friends through this society, things were cool. There was a bit of flirting, and eventually one day there were a bunch of us at her house, she and I somehow got separated from everyone else, and yeah. It just kinda happened.

The general theme of these is that I was mainly just living my life and naturally met girls, whom I ended up having relationships with for whatever reason. That's basically how it happens in general, I think; live your life, be yourself. Don't actively pursue relationships. They will happen, if you just get yourself out in the world and give yourself the opportunities to live and love life.

Also, confidence. Confidence is SO important in everything ever, especially relationships. To be confident you need to love yourself, to be passionate about what you do and really believe in yourself. This is difficult, I know. But once you can do this you'll find that everything just starts going 'right' for you.

So yeah, there's my rambling on the matter! I hope it was interesting for at least one person.

[Rukentuts]

I am forever alone. Just the way it has to be.

[Deleted]

I am forever alone. Just the way it has to be.

*high five* Amen, brother. Me too.

The worst part about being a shy and quiet chap is it makes you completely invisible to women, even those who might actually like you.