Is it Cheating?

[breadisfunny]

So, here's the scenario. My girlfriend, her friend and I are all sitting in the back of this car. My best friend and another friend are sitting up front, we are all drinking, having a good time. The girls are GONE, and i step out for a bit to get some fresh air. I'm gone for...3 minutes? I come back, I find out my girlfriend made out with her friend, after her friend kissed her. My friends up front swear it was for a good minute, it wasn't a peck, it wasn't that she was in shock, she seemed to go with it, for a good solid minute.

Things to consider:

1. She is a pansexual (my girlfriend).
2. Anyone guy who comes in here saying I should stop worrying because it's hot, stop. I don't care, simply because it's a stupid stereotype to put on girls.
3. When I asked her if it was then okay to make out with a straight girl-friend of mine, she said no it's not okay, why? Because she's straight and so am I.

i dont see this as cheating.

[Mukki]

Lol no, long story short all of our places to drink were out of order, but dammit we wanted to get drunk so that wasn't going to stop us, and it was freezing outside.

Also, she DOESN'T consider it cheating because it was her best friend. I was not okay with that response, to me it doesn't matter.

Honestly, from what I'm hearing it sounds like she's trying to impose a double standard on you with pitiful excuses to keep you from essentially doing the same thing. Why can't you make out with a girl who happens to be your 'best friend' if it's okay for her using that justification? Being straight has nothing to do with it, she's tri/bi/pansexual or whatever, so making out with a girl whether her best friend or not, is still cheating.

Judge your lady by her actions, not her words, she's trying to get you caught up with her doubletalk and straight up man, you're being disrespected.

---------- Post added 2012-12-29 at 08:10 PM ----------

If she wants that type of stuff, then by all means, leave. I'm not going to stop her, because she obviously does not want what I want, and it'll cause more problems, but she has told me time and time again that she loves me more than anything. I'm the first guy, out of 20+ guys/gals that she can honestly say she loves/loved. I'm her everything, world etc etc. If I acted like I OWNED her, I wouldn't let it happen, I would baby her in terms of her life, and I don't.

As I said, judge her by her actions, not her words. People will oftentimes say one thing and do another. Would you feel better if she was telling you how much she loved you while making out with another dude?

also, to everyone nagging at the idea of pansexual, it just means she looks past gender, and loves the person for who they are, not for their gender, it's not a copout.

Personally, just seems like a 'hip' way to say bisexual. Yes, I'm aware bi means 2, so transgenders may not be covered, but I never imagined that was a problem for bisexual people, so just another unnecessary label imo.

[Gamdwelf]

Honestly, from what I'm hearing it sounds like she's trying to impose a double standard on you with pitiful excuses to keep you from essentially doing the same thing. Why can't you make out with a girl who happens to be your 'best friend' if it's okay for her using that justification? Being straight has nothing to do with it, she's tri/bi/pansexual or whatever, so making out with a girl whether her best friend or not, is still cheating.

Judge your lady by her actions, not her words, she's trying to get you caught up with her doubletalk and straight up man, you're being disrespected.

---------- Post added 2012-12-29 at 08:10 PM ----------



As I said, judge her by her actions, not her words. People will oftentimes say one thing and do another. Would you feel better if she was telling you how much she loved you while making out with another dude?



Personally, just seems like a 'hip' way to say bisexual. Yes, I'm aware bi means 2, so transgenders may not be covered, but I never imagined that was a problem for bisexual people, so just another unnecessary label imo.

well the difference is that bi-sexuals are attracted to both males and females, while pansexuals are not really attracted to genders, but to people as a whole, its like they look past the physicalness of a person, its not about attractiveness of the body but of the soul.

[Amnasty]

Yep cheating, shes making excuses, make out with your best guy friend and see if she gets pissy.

[Gamdwelf]

Yep cheating, shes making excuses, make out with your best guy friend and see if she gets pissy.

but hes not attracted to guys.

[StationaryHawk]

I would vote yes. Judging by your fretting over it and the necessity to ask this question, it's definitely worth discussing either way.

[Maxilian]

Lol no, long story short all of our places to drink were out of order, but dammit we wanted to get drunk so that wasn't going to stop us, and it was freezing outside.

Also, she DOESN'T consider it cheating because it was her best friend. I was not okay with that response, to me it doesn't matter.

Well you answered yourself..., You were not ok with her answer nor with her action, so just tell her to never do that again, that you didn't liked it, maybe it will be ok if she it were a game but even if it were a game she should have tell you...

[Ulgrim]

sitting in the back of this car. My best friend and another friend are sitting up front, we are all drinking, having a good time.

I scanned the first few pages, and no one had a comment on this?

Anyways if you have to ask, then it's definitely cheating.

[Deleted]

Depends on her intentions. To me it sounds just a drunken experimental make out with a close person of the same gender.

[Moinaldo]

Yes it is cheating, give her a little shit for it, make her feel guilty for a while then forgive her. It's only kissing, but make sure she knows you wont accept it a second time.

Totally agree with this post. Do exactly as he says, make fer feel the guilt for a while and forgive her... but let her know, in a clear way that you won't forgive her a second time.

[Lovechile]

cheating. Girls like that are the reason girls like me get called fence sitters and such. If you're bi or pan-sexual, that's fine. That doesn't mean you get to do what you want when you want with who you want with no consequences, that just makes you greedy.