How much does it bother you when...

[Xanjori]

How long have you got?

At least 30minutes, at maximum 2 hours. If you cant get it in within 2 hours its not me you need to be talking to!

[Kerath]

At least 30minutes, at maximum 2 hours. If you cant get it in within 2 hours its not me you need to be talking to!

Haha, touché!

[Deleted]

No, those are exactly the same. People who said how are you don't give a crap about how you actually are. People who say good to see you don't actually think it's any good to see you. It's as crappy and meaningless as saying "we should hang out".

No, because the second implies they want to do something some time. Being friendly and suggesting an activity are 2 completely different things.

I agree that "it's good to see you again" often is meaningless, but that in fact is pure politeness.

[Veyne]

That's just mean! Now they're forced to be polite and ask you to lay it on them

Well then you shouldn't have asked the question! I always tell people what's up. I might not get into the knitty gritty, but I won't hesitate to admit if my day has been complete shit.

[semaphore]

No, because the second implies they want to do something some time.

How are you implies they want to do something (hear you talk) some time (current time). You're drawing an arbitrary line, better to just stick with "we say 'how are you' all the time to be polite but not 'lets hang out'"

[Ashnazg]

People say "We need to hang out!!" then never contact you.

Vast majority of the time, in my experience, it's girls doing this. (No offense to any female gamer comrades who may be on here, as this is only my experience.)

I've learned to just say "Yeah, text me some time!" (putting the responsibility on them) sigh in exasperation when I never hear from them, then move on.

I used to follow through and take initiative to try to set something up (they're the ones who said they wanted to!) th, when they'd leave me hanging so long I'd fall on my face, cry

In America, "we need to hang out" means "I gotta go, peace out, it was nice seeing you". Nothing more.

People who really wanna hang out set specific dates, like: "We need to hang out. I am free next week, wanna make something happen then?"

[Wikko]

This actually happened to me a few months ago. It was me who ran into and old good friend whom I had not seen in a while and I said exactly that. Havent really seen him after that tho and I feel bad.

[Deleted]

I couldn't care less. I've stopped expecting the best of people anyway.

[Maxilian]

It happens quite often to me, more of the time when i want to get close to someone, for example: There are some people i met in the college, and i talk a lot with them in there, but i would really love to hang out with them sometimes, but they just keep making excuse or they say like, hey next week lets do X thing but in the end we do nothing, or they tell me, hey i´m going to call you these weekend to go out... but guess what?! That call never happen >.>

[Deleted]

I always ask if people want to hang out and that, or used to, but I never said I would organize it or anything because I don't like doing that, needless to say, nothing ever happens.

._.

But it really doesn't bother me anymore lol.

[Cthulhu 2020]

It's a matter of different social etiquettes. You only accept "how are you" as such because you expect it to be; other social circles can to treat "we should hang out sometimes" in the exact same way.

Sounds unnecessary and I have zero clue how it could ever evolve to be considered courteous to say "we should hang out sometime" without any intention of doing so.

I accept that there are aspects of the social game that are a bit silly, but the fact that it's becoming mroe and more disingenuous makes me roll my eyes. I'm going to guess this whole "hey we should hang out sometime" thing came from people not wanting to feel bad about denying someone?

Reminds me of the social game that people play with others who seem interested in them, i.e. stringing them along and then calling it "polite" because they feel bad about turning someone down... when just turning them down is ultimately the more polite thing to do.

[Reeve]

It's called being polite...

Being polite would be "It's really good to see you, but I've gotta run..." Saying "We should hang out sometime!" when you don't really want to hang out is just dishonest.

[Cthulhu 2020]

Being polite would be "It's really good to see you, but I've gotta run..." Saying "We should hang out sometime!" when you don't really want to hang out is just dishonest.

After going back and reading some of the responses to this thread, it's apparently considered polite to be disingenuous and pretend to be interested in hanging out with someone when you have no intention of doing so.

...

I think people need to read the above and really consider just how absurd that is.

[semaphore]

I think people need to read the above and really consider just how absurd that is.

Social life is absurd. So much better being an introvert :3

[Pony Soldier]

I could care less. I'm more of a loner so I like to keep to myself more than hanging out somewhere. The only time I actually enjoy going out is when I go to a friends house and just play some games, I'm not really into doing activities like going out to play sports (unless it's bowling or miniature golf) or just going somewhere to just hangout, talk and pass the time (I hate those the most, it's a waste of time). I've had "friends" I made in school that used to call me or text wanting to go somewhere or hangout and I never answered them because I didn't really like them enough to hangout with them. I only have like 4 real friends that I like to hangout with and that's only because we all have something in common and that's video games. So whenever we hangout it always involves playing games.

[Mercadi]

I've never had a friend not come to a meeting/date. Guess I'm just lucky.

[Liagala]

At least 30minutes, at maximum 2 hours. If you cant get it in within 2 hours its not me you need to be talking to!

I just skipped to the last page and saw this as the first post. I really hope that when I go to page 3 to find out what you're talking about, it turns out to be at least half as interesting as it seems without context!

[Kerath]

I just skipped to the last page and saw this as the first post. I really hope that when I go to page 3 to find out what you're talking about, it turns out to be at least half as interesting as it seems without context!

Sorry to disappoint, but it isn't

[Liagala]

Sorry to disappoint, but it isn't

No, not at all. Sadface. I thought you were trying to resurrect that "7-13 minutes" thread.

On topic, it doesn't bother me at all. I pay no more attention to "we should hang out sometime" than I do to "good to see you, it's been too long" or "how are you" (coming from an acquaintance rather than an actual friend), or any of those other platitudes we throw at each other because that's what we're supposed to do. Those are the things we say to satisfy social protocols, and have no other meaning to me. They basically say, "Hi, I care about you at least enough to spend a minute being polite. You're above the general masses in my opinion." If they follow "We should hang out some time" with "What are you doing next Saturday?" it usually throws me for a loop. Then I have to decide on the spot whether or not I actually want to hang out with them, or if my agreement was just polite noise - and if not, how to get that across without breaking those invisible societal rules of what's okay to say and what isn't.

[Rukentuts]

Social life is absurd. So much better being an introvert :3

Eh, we get lonely though. But we also simultaneously can't stand extended social interactions.

We're weird.