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  1. #261
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    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    female happiness/satisfaction is the same or declines after marriage.
    So free money doesn't make happy then?

  2. #262
    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    If you choose wisely you can find a man who will help you with house work. I get your point though, since my apartment is a mess most of the time.
    I could but people are unpredictable and personality/habits change over time.

    Ever since women started thinking like men the rate of marriage has been going down. Women who think like you basically hand men their trump card, so they don't have a reason to be responsible.
    I don't need men to be responsible beyond wearing a condom if it's just about sex. That being said, I choose my partners carefully.


    Here sexism comes in to play. Women get to adopt and men don't. We are handicapped when it comes to reproduction which has been the main driving force of society. Men have been aspiring to power and wealth to ensure the survival of their children, because men can't give birth they have to compensate with time and energy.

    Also why do you think you are so special? Do you honestly think that there are no men worthy of your hand? You could just look for someone who shares your interests (i.e. money and power).
    This is just silly because lots of men adopt, they just adopt internationally (same as single women).

    This has nothing to do with being special, it is about protecting myself and my assets and having the fundamental understanding that quality relationships that last a lifetime that are few and far between.

  3. #263
    Merely a Setback Kaleredar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    Ultimately, it is pretty much a non debate regarding the fact that women get the short end of the stick in regards to marriage.

    No thanks.
    With that statement, you're basically "consigning" yourself to what I stated, a conclusion based on your assumption that if you get married, your husband will inevitably become a slob, and you'll be forced to do everything for him until you divorce him. Now, keeping in mind this sentiment, in relation to the other person you quoted, you seemed to support the notion people could be life partners without needing to be "married," therefore creating a conclusion that being married is the only thing that would lead to you filling some familial role you don't wish to fill (i.e, serving slob husband,) whereas you could otherwise remain not married, but still with the person, and be free of such a fate.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kio View Post
    My point was the last sentence of my post.
    One which the first statement of my response post addressed.
    “Do not lose time on daily trivialities. Do not dwell on petty detail. For all of these things melt away and drift apart within the obscure traffic of time. Live well and live broadly. You are alive and living now. Now is the envy of all of the dead.” ~ Emily3, World of Tomorrow
    Quote Originally Posted by Wells View Post
    Kaleredar is right...
    Words to live by.

  4. #264
    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    4. people change over the course of a lifetime, i.e. that active person you met while rock climbing can very well turn into a sad little couch slug in a few years down the road.
    You know that you could very well end the same way right? An active and ambitious person like yourself could lose his drive and end up playing wow with a house full of cats.

    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    Ultimately, it is pretty much a non debate regarding the fact that women get the short end of the stick in regards to marriage.

    No thanks.
    If they aren't happy they can get a divorce. Men get the short end of the stick 9 out of 10 times when it comes to divorce. Their suicide rates sky rocket once they lose their children, homes and loved one.

    http://www.aolnews.com/2010/03/10/su...esearch-finds/

    And while married women often balance employment with child rearing, Denney said statistics suggest they're coping quite well. "Women remain the primary caretakers in most households," he said. "They're working more, yet feeling better.''
    Last edited by Cybran; 2013-02-18 at 09:20 AM.

  5. #265
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaleredar View Post
    With that statement, you're basically "consigning" yourself to what I stated, a conclusion based on your assumption that if you get married, your husband will inevitably become a slob, and you'll be forced to do everything for him. Furthermore, in relation to the other person you quoted, you seemed to support the notion people could be life partners without needing to be "married," therefore creating a conclusion that being married is the only thing that would lead to you filling some familial role you don't wish to fill (i.e, serving slob husband,) whereas you could otherwise remain not married, but still with the person, and be free of such a fate.
    There are no assumptions. Not all husbands turn into lazy slobs (my father worked two jobs part time--including being a military reservist--as supplementary income for our family outside of his career as a commercial airline pilot), obviously not marrying someone does not mean they would not become a lazy slob.

    My fundamental belief is that most marriages do not work. There is a 50% divorce rate in the U.S., but I would argue that less than half of those couples who are married are in a mutually satisfying relationship; the rest stay in the relationship due to financial constraints/children/emotional constraints/habit. That is not a very good success rate for marriage.

  6. #266
    Merely a Setback Kaleredar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post

    My fundamental belief is that most marriages do not work. There is a 50% divorce rate in the U.S., but I would argue that less than half of those couples who are married are in a mutually satisfying relationship; the rest stay in the relationship due to financial constraints/children/emotional constraints/habit. That is not a very good success rate for marriage.
    Read my post near the top of the page, responding to Seta-san.
    “Do not lose time on daily trivialities. Do not dwell on petty detail. For all of these things melt away and drift apart within the obscure traffic of time. Live well and live broadly. You are alive and living now. Now is the envy of all of the dead.” ~ Emily3, World of Tomorrow
    Quote Originally Posted by Wells View Post
    Kaleredar is right...
    Words to live by.

  7. #267
    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    You know that you could very well end the same way right? An active and ambitious person like yourself could lose his drive and end up playing wow with a house full of cats.
    Of course, but I am forced to live with myself if that happens, unlike living with another person.

    Also I'm a dog person.


    If they aren't happy they can get a divorce. Men get the short end of the stick 9 out of 10 times when it comes to divorce. Their suicide rates sky rocket once they lose their children, homes and loved one.
    Yup, men are more emotionally invested than women are, and since they are usually the one making the greater amount of income, they are the ones who usually end up paying spousal support. Also women are more likely to get primary custody of children.

    People stay married for a variety of reasons, extracting oneself from a marriage can be a long, emotionally taxing, and financially costly process.

  8. #268
    I just wish people wouldn't blame marriage as an institution for people failing to marry the right person. Marriage has it's benefits including the sense of stability and commitment. There are no guarantees people will stay together with or without being married.

  9. #269
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaleredar View Post
    Read my post near the top of the page, responding to Seta-san.
    Oh yes, I am familiar with what you posted. The 50% divorce rate is accurate which is why I stated it, but yes if you break it down by age of marriage it does look more promising.

    It is possible that divorce statistics will improve over time rather than decline as marriage continues to be viewed as a lifestyle option rather than being socially mandated. At the same time however, divorce statistics could also increase as spouses realize that being divorced carries less of a social stigma than it once did.

  10. #270
    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    I just wish people wouldn't blame marriage as an institution for people failing to marry the right person. Marriage has it's benefits including the sense of stability and commitment. There are no guarantees people will stay together with or without being married.
    Marriage itself isn't the problem, society around it and women are. At this point, why would I "risk" marriage as a man when I can love someone just fine outside it?

  11. #271
    Quote Originally Posted by isadorr View Post
    How is someone a pig that is hanging out with multiple girls? If you arent going out and are just going on occasional dates and fooling around, then you arent going out or married. Who wouldnt want to keep their options open if a beautiful sexy girl comes along in the gym and starts talking to me? Should i walk away because i might be seeing someone or are just taking it slow, not even going out. People take that so seriously now which is why dating younger women makes it so much easier than dealing with a older women who wants kids now and marriage and feels time creeping up.
    You don't have to care about other human beings but just be honest about it. If you are not honest about it then yes you are a pig.
    I wonder how many girls you would be hanging out with if you told them about the others.

    Or is there some statistic, experiment or study about how people don't care being lied to?

  12. #272
    Quote Originally Posted by Sevyvia View Post
    Marriage itself isn't the problem, society around it and women are. At this point, why would I "risk" marriage as a man when I can love someone just fine outside it?
    Why do you think women are the problem?

    Or society, for that matter.

  13. #273
    The Lightbringer Issalice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amirila View Post
    If you have five other women then you should not get married
    This. You obviously have the lifestyle of someone that does not want to get married. Who cares what she says. She obviously wants to get married, she should just move on and be with someone that wants to settle down. Case closed. Marriage is a personal decision. Not everyone wants to, and it isn't right for everyone.

  14. #274
    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    There are no assumptions. Not all husbands turn into lazy slobs (my father worked two jobs part time--including being a military reservist--as supplementary income for our family outside of his career as a commercial airline pilot), obviously not marrying someone does not mean they would not become a lazy slob.

    My fundamental belief is that most marriages do not work. There is a 50% divorce rate in the U.S., but I would argue that less than half of those couples who are married are in a mutually satisfying relationship; the rest stay in the relationship due to financial constraints/children/emotional constraints/habit. That is not a very good success rate for marriage.
    Well...honestly if you believe a marriage isn't going to work, then it won't. Both people have to put 100% into a relationship in order for it to work, obviously. Most people these days get married because it's the thing to do, they don't understand its original purpose and believe that any problems that occur during the relationship will fix themselves just because they're married. When problems do arise most people don't have the patience to resolve them (mostly in part to individuals never thinking that they themselves might be to blame) because they believed that marriage would magically make them love each other forever.

    You seem to be acting as if you have no control over the situation and that a marriage will definitely fail no matter what you do. You seem like a smart person, I think you'd be able to reason whether or not your partner is worth marrying or not.
    It's could've and would've. Not could of and would of. Not sure when "of" started meaning "have," but everyone who thinks it does needs to go back to school.

  15. #275
    Quote Originally Posted by Celista View Post
    Why do you think women are the problem?

    Or society, for that matter.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlvMAS_20K4

    I hate to repeat myself, but ever since women started thinking like men ("sex with no strings is attached"), men have been losing the desire to push themselves.
    Last edited by Cybran; 2013-02-18 at 10:01 AM.

  16. #276
    I like how people are saying "If you chose not to get married you are a pig and people will look at you being disguested at the age of 35"
    Or "If you say you dont want to be married, then you are not old enough to know better"
    Or that "there must be something wrong with you, you are insecure (and other reasons), if you dont get married"

    So if people dont share your opinion, then there must be something wrong with them? Would it not sound more reasonable to say "You are insecure because you need to have it written down on paper to feel secure with your partner"?
    Why do i think marriage fail? Because of "Love", you think you "love someone", but in reality 2 years later you no longer "love this person", and you are boored of them. Sure maybe you look at them as if they are your best friend, but what about everything else that is suppose to be in a relationship? Should you stay together and dont be sexually attracted to your partner, and then "live like friends/roomates" do?
    “The worst thing I can be is the same as everybody else. I hate that.”

  17. #277
    Deleted
    In my country parents get some benefits when being married if they get a child. If they're separated, only the woman gets the benefits.

  18. #278
    Mechagnome Fitzgerald77's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dydric View Post
    no good reason to get married these days! Can anyone think of a good point of getting married!

    1. I get sex on a regular basis.
    2. don't have the annoyance of a woman calling my house all day.
    3. I really don't believe a man should take care of a woman. women should work at all times exactly like a man should, or starve.
    Preach bro, PREACH!!!

    I never want to get married... And I probably never will be with me not wanting to have kids. To me, marriage it's just more unneeded headaches and problems in life.

    I really, REALLY like number 3 by the way. I have never really understood this whole obligation for a man to settle down with someone and support a woman and kids either, it irritates me to no end.

    But uhh, 5 women on the side? That's just plain uncool IMO. I would never cheat or fool around on the side while dating a woman simply because I would never do something to someone that I wouldn't want done to me.
    So good to be an ant who crawls atop a spinning rock
    Currently playing: Bioshock 2,Far Cry 3

  19. #279
    Quote Originally Posted by Dydric View Post
    no good reason to get married these days! Can anyone think of a good point of getting married!

    1. I get sex on a regular basis.
    2. don't have the annoyance of a woman calling my house all day.
    3. I really don't believe a man should take care of a woman. women should work at all times exactly like a man should, or starve.


    the reason I bring is up is because, I've been talking to this girl for a while (I also have 5 women on the side) and she's trying to judge me saying. every man should get married at some point in his life. this I feel is very judgmental and wrong, what do you all think? also she's bringing up the baby conversations, ridiculous.
    1. Being married you can have that sex on a regular basis mean something more, having a special connection with that person that you don't have with anyone else.

    2. It seems you only care about yourself.

    3. Men and woman are different and they complete each other, in a marriage, both sides take care of each other and should be selfless toward each other. Completely reciprocal.

    4. Sex makes children! Who would of thought? Children need their loving parents that love each other (True love, being selfless, not JUST lust).

    Stop using women as objects, even if they want to be treated as such. Treat them as a person.

    People using sex just to "have fun" and don't care about the baby it makes (gets murdered in a lot of cases), don't care about what it does to yourself, how having multiple partners just makes you more and more empty. Does not care about both sides families, that baby was someones grandson/daughter/, cousin, nephew etc.

    It makes me sad when people keep on having sex with so many people and don't want any commitment, or are only committed until something "better" comes along, or to "keep your options open." You are "single" but keep on "coupling."

  20. #280
    For many european countries there are actually plenty of reasons *not* to get married. Most importantly, taxes (married couples often pay more taxes because they are taxed together) and legal stuff. Then, the whole mess with the second name. Finally, divorce is extremely expensive in any case.

    ---------- Post added 2013-02-18 at 01:20 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Belisarius565 View Post
    1. Being married you can have that sex on a regular basis mean something more, having a special connection with that person that you don't have with anyone else.
    I don't need a piece of paper or a ridiculous ritual to have a special connection to other person.

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