Polyamoury, why the stigma?

[Egoism]

In a modern world, it seems silly that the public views polyamoury the way it still does.

I've always been polyamourous, I've been open about it with my partners, girlfriends, etc. It has never caused any problems for me, because all my relationships have been built upon mutual honesty and trust.

Yet when this comes up in conversation, I always get judged as a slut, or a cheater, it is not fair I tells ya!

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It should be noted that I am American, speaking from a perspective in the South Eastern US.

Results may vary by location.

[Deleted]

After reading this thread, and then looking at the OP's name, it just hit me. Bait thread....not falling for this one tvm.

[Deleted]

Society's default today is monogamous relationships; It's the default when a person enters a relationship, accept that people will find what you do strange.

Accept that people will compare you ignorantly to the middle east, as i've seen examples as such used by those opposing it.

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People are judged for everything in today's society, slept with too many people? Whore. Wrong body shape? Lel, fatty. Didn't finish college? Deadbeat.

Best thing you can do is evaluate your friends, which you seem to fail at - Judging that they're calling you a slut and a cheater.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

Society's default today is monogamous relationships; It's the default when a person enters a relationship, accept that people will find what you do strange.

Accept that people will compare you ignorantly to the middle east, as i've seen examples as such used by those opposing it.

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People are judged for everything in today's society, slept with too many people? Whore. Wrong body shape? Lel, fatty. Didn't finish college? Deadbeat.

Best thing you can do is evaluate your friends, which you seem to fail at - Judging that they're calling you a slut and a cheater.

I don't you can compare sleeping with someone else in a relationship or sleeping with loads of people with no heed to the consequences to someone that is fat. Manakin you're slipping!

[S7orm]

so you live in the bible-belt and find it weird other people call you names for not being a straight white republican gun loving christian person?

it seems much of a troll-thread btw

[Deleted]

I don't you can compare sleeping with someone else in a relationship or sleeping with loads of people with no heed to the consequences to someone that is fat. Manakin you're slipping!

I was making a comparison of how judgmental society can be, not between each of the examples used.

Society is very judgmental and oft irrational, interracial relationships are frowned upon in areas, mixed race babies more so - And polyamory, which few people opt for; Go figure

[Egoism]

After reading this thread, and then looking at the OP's name, it just hit me. Bait thread....not falling for this one tvm.

That is my warlock's name, I base my character names on philosophical ideologies they may follow.

Nice try tho.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

I was making a comparison of how judgmental society can be, not between each of the examples used.

Society is very judgmental and oft irrational, interracial relationships are frowned upon in areas, mixed race babies more so - And polyamory, which few people opt for; Go figure

It's not for me but I'm not going to call them dirtbag or anything. Maybe a hybrid...but that's it. Although I wouldn't call a hybrid an insult.

[Egoism]

I don't you can compare sleeping with someone else in a relationship or sleeping with loads of people with no heed to the consequences to someone that is fat. Manakin you're slipping!

That is not polyamoury, that is being a whore.

I do not "sleep with loads of people" I simply maintain romantic relationships at a rate of greater than or equal to 1, at one time.

These are not casual encounters, these are meaningful relationships.

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I wouldn't call coastal Florida the bible belt.

[Deleted]

It's not for me but I'm not going to call them dirtbag or anything. Maybe a hybrid...but that's it. Although I wouldn't call a hybrid an insult.

For some reason i found that hilarious, "Hybrid"... the new evolutionary stage of man!

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Because you're significantly outside of the norm and thus what people are used to or understand.

Aaaaaaand this.

Nixx is in the house, so time to sit back and drink my earl grey.

[belfpala]

Because http://www.zazzle.com/polyamory_is_w...70507350536098

[Egoism]

For some reason i found that hilarious, "Hybrid"... the new evolutionary stage of man!

Fun Fact: You're not wrong, technically.

The Y part of the XY that make up males is becoming less and less influential as generations move on, so at this rate, in a few hundred thousand years or so, there may just be one sex of human.

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Because http://www.zazzle.com/polyamory_is_w...70507350536098

I suddenly want that shirt.

[Deleted]

Fun Fact: You're not wrong, technically.

The Y part of the XY that make up males is becoming less and less influential as generations move on, so at this rate, in a few hundred thousand years or so, there may just be one sex of human..

Which is largely junk science, the only scientific evidence so far that's been tested and sampled is from our closest cousins the rhesus macaque monkeys; http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencete...key-study.html

Naturally it debunks what you stated.

Edit; brainfart...

[Natiry427]

As someone who accepted a partner that had another relationship and gave me an STI as a result, I think these relationships can be pretty harmful for a lot of reasons.

1. Transfer of STIs or STDs
2. Partner becoming pregnant/getting someone else pregnant and having to leave you for them
3. Partner's quick loss of interest in sex
4. Partner using or exploiting each of his or her other partners for specific reasons such as financial, social, emotional, sexual, etc.
5. The threat of always feeling like he/she could leave at any moment for another partner.
6. Lack of loyalty can hint at selfishness or inability to commit in general
7. One partner doesn't feel as emotionally invested in the relationship as the other, which kills a lot of the romantic aspect.
8. Impossible to regulate cheating and the number of partners your partner has, resulting in major lack of trust.
9. Emotional trauma resulting if any of the above mentioned happens.

In my experience, whenever a partner of mine has told me he wanted to engage in an open relationship, it usually meant he was already cheating or was looking for something better without the fear of losing me for emotional/social/financial reasons. Never letting it happen again.

[Deleted]

Because people are selfish by nature no matter how much we try to deny it, your partners will feel left out if they're not the only one you're in relationship with. It always boils down to who do you love the most(it's impossible to like all equally), and to the rest it will feel like that one person is the only one you love.

[Egoism]

Which is largely junk science, the only scientific evidence so far that's been tested and sampled is from our closest cousins the rhesus macaque monkeys; http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencete...key-study.html

Naturally it what you stated.

UGH, daily mail, I must be wrong then...

[Deleted]

UGH, daily mail, I must be wrong then...

Or you can read the sources, but that may be challenging if your aversion to it is so strong...

[Egoism]

As someone who accepted a partner that had another relationship and gave me an STI as a result, I think these relationships can be pretty harmful for a lot of reasons.

I'm sorry that happened to you, but that is not indicative of the nature of genuine polyamoury *glances at belfpala "THATS RIGHT, I SAID IT!"*

Honesty and standard safety precautions can prevent that from occuring, people should always be using anti-std/pregnancy measures anyways, not to mention getting regular check ups.

Even moreso if engaged in polyamoury.

It is stupid not to be safe about sex.

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Or you can read the sources, but that may be challenging if your aversion to it is so strong...

I'll risk it, but the sooner I get off that site, the better.

[Underverse]

Humans are polyamorous by nature. I think the lack of adherence to the social institutions of monogamy and marriage should be enough evidence of that - as in, even under intense social pressure to act a certain way, we still don't act that way.

I can certainly see this changing in the near-ish future. But like every other change it has a certain activation energy - the nuclear family has to be not only logically removed as the gold standard of social organization, but also commercially removed, which is a much more difficult task, as much of the organization in our societies today are built around the idea of a nuclear family, which has persisted for probably around 20,000 years (that's a high estimate, it may well be closer to 12,000).

[Egoism]

Because people are selfish by nature no matter how much we try to deny it, your partners will feel left out if they're not the only one you're in relationship with. It always boils down to who do you love the most(it's impossible to like all equally), and to the rest it will feel like that one person is the only one you love.

My partners have tended to understand the situation, more often than not, its about what you get out of the individual relationships, they allow different aspects of your personality to come out, masculine/feminine sides, dominant/submissive, etc.

Being humble about it helps too, but that is harder for people to deal with.