Now visitors to covid.gov are properly oriented. We all understand that we have been hoodwinked by a massive government conspiracy, and only the 47th president — who had nothing to do with anything covid-related — can save us.
Scroll to: a Google Earth map of Wuhan, China, which has been doctored to have some kind of shaky, smoky effect, showing visitors that the Wuhan Institute of Virology is just 7.5 miles from the Huanan Seafood Market.
Has that sunk in yet? If so, get ready to have your mind further blown. The National Institutes of Health is about 7.5 miles from the Smithsonian National Zoo. My neighborhood is about 7.5 miles from the White House. The Trump National Golf Club at Bedminster, New Jersey, is about 7.5 miles from the Wendy’s in Branchburg, New Jersey. Do you see what we’re talking about here? (If you do, could you explain it to me?)
Scroll to: a portrait of a beleaguered Anthony S. Fauci pressing his hand to his forehead, next to a pdf of the preemptive pardon President Joe Biden granted Fauci before he left office. Now we are really getting to the bottom of this, because before I opened “LAB LEAK: THE TRUE ORIGINS OF Covid-19,” I would have told you the reason Biden preemptively pardoned Fauci was not because of wrongdoing but because Biden feared that the famously vengeful Trump would seek to punish Fauci. And I would have noted that Trump turning on Fauci was one of the more bewildering things to happen in 2020. Fauci wasn’t a Biden guy. He was the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases during Trump’s first term. Trump invited Fauci to brief America on the coronavirus crisis many times, putting him forth as a trustworthy expert.
Scroll to: shady-looking images of former New York governor Andrew M. Cuomo. Scroll to: “There was no conclusive evidence that masks effectively protected Americans from COVID-19.” The aesthetics of all of this can best be described as “The Apprentice” meets “To Catch a Predator,” as if at any scroll, Chris Hansen is going to pop out from behind a sofa and accuse Fauci of sexting underage covid vials.
By now we might all know that coherent aesthetics are not necessarily a priority for this administration. The homepage for the U.S. DOGE Service looks like a GeoCities project circa 1997. MelaniaTrump.com sells an absolutely wild hodgepodge of Christmas ornaments, NFTs and jewelry. Hulk Hogan ripped off his shirt at the Republican National Convention. Trump likes what he likes, and calling someone else tacky almost always makes the critic look snobby.
So I almost left all of this alone. Except, after visiting “LAB LEAK: THE TRUE ORIGINS OF Covid-19” — after sending it to a couple of people and having a good chuckle — I learned that
covid.gov was not a Trump original, like DOGE.gov or MelaniaTrump.com. Rather, it was a complete overhaul of a previous government website, which was originally created to provide resources and information — how to get a free coronavirus test; what warning signs to look for regarding long covid — for a terrified public. As recently as April 1, the homepage contained guidance about which populations would most benefit from a vaccine booster.
The Library of Congress has archived versions of covid.gov only going back as far as 2022, two years into the pandemic. But you know what archived site is available going back to March 2020? The White House’s page touting its coronavirus response. And you know what you find when you look at that site?
You find reminders that Trump didn’t inherit this pandemic from the Biden administration; Trump was president for the entire first nine months of the pandemic. The White House was bragging that it distributed 125 million face masks to school districts — the masks that “LAB LEAK” now decries as ineffective. That they launched Operation Warp Speed to develop the very vaccines that many of Trump’s followers now believe either don’t work, will make you infertile, or contain nanobots.
This is what is killing me about “LAB LEAK: THE TRUE ORIGINS OF Covid-19.” Not that it’s weird, ugly or lame. But that this was a normal government website until just a few days ago, and now, boom, everything that was once carefully vetted and fact-checked is gone. It’s a full-scale rewriting of history, using official government channels.