You're too hard on yourself

[the game]

So people have been telling me my whole life that I'm too hard on myself. But I don't understand what it means. Usually it's said to me after I tell someone I can do better or I say something along the lines of I didn't do a good enough job.

[Deleted]

People in general have no standards and do not understand when you are unhappy with certain results.

Just nod and carry on really.

[Babadoo]

You have to learn to forgive yourself so you don't live in the past of your mistakes.

[ItachiZaku]

Sometimes we dwell on past shit too much or overreact to our short comings. Stop it.

[Gandrake]

basically the nicer version of "you're taking this way too seriously"

[The5thVegetable]

Basically what everyone else is saying.

However, I say, if your reason for saying such has nothing to do with self-loathing or feeling like you should be better, and is instead all about simply wanting to improve, then don't heed that advise! Nothing bad ever came of trying improve(as far as I know.)

[Deleted]

While it is an overused phrase, it does sometimes have a point. Self-critique and wanting to improve is commendable, but we are often our own harshest critics and do sometimes tend to react in ways that are not entirely productive when we don't live up to our own expectations. Not knowing your reactions or the conversations that take place subsequently, it's hard to say anything specific.

[Doctor Amadeus]

Sometimes people are hard on themselves, as a way of excusing their shitty behavior towards others. For example just like people who are ultra positive all the time, and never like anything else near them not even a fart, these are the same as the people who are always negative and hateful towards others.


In short they are all methods of hiding, because it is much easier to cling to comforts that allow someone to never really confront what their problem is, themselves.

[Macaquerie]

Honestly the main reason people say that is because nobody likes to hear you go off on some woe is me routine and just want to say some words of encouragement so they can get back to worrying about their own lives. Self criticism is always healthy but it's not really self criticism if you do it out loud for everyone else to hear.

[Vargulf the Happy Husky]

they're trying to make you feel better about yourself. what they don't realize is that you criticizing yourself is probably a good motivator for you.

Being nice is something stupid people do to hedge their bets. - Rick 2017

[slime]

it's always amusing to me how different all people are. I don't know you at all and I want to say to you "You are not being hard enough on yourself".

[downnola]

People in general have no standards and do not understand when you are unhappy with certain results.

Just nod and carry on really.

Precisely. There's a difference between useless self-criticism, and setting higher standards for yourself. How the hell else are you supposed to improve at anything if you're unwilling to acknowledge your faults and set higher standards for yourself?

[Fencers]

Ignore those people. They're animals and idiots.

[Kathandira]

So people have been telling me my whole life that I'm too hard on myself. But I don't understand what it means. Usually it's said to me after I tell someone I can do better or I say something along the lines of I didn't do a good enough job.

You provided a negative feeling, they give you an empathetic response. That is all there is to it, they are just trying to make you feel a little better.

[Deleted]

Just reply with "Wanna see something else that's hard?"

[vindicatorx]

So people have been telling me my whole life that I'm too hard on myself. But I don't understand what it means. Usually it's said to me after I tell someone I can do better or I say something along the lines of I didn't do a good enough job.

Sounds like a conversation you should have with your therapist. Based on your creation of pointless threads I would say you should be much harder on yourself and always ask yourself does this stupid question/topic warrant an audience? If you think it might then rethink it over and ask yourself am I posting this because I'm bored and have nothing better to do? If the answer is even a possibly, then don't post it.