Socializing: Poker in a pub vs. Gaming in a group

[Deleted]

many years ago people would gather in a pub to drink and play board games. this is like the definition of socializing for everyone that is not from our generation (with our generation I mean everyone who has engaged in online gaming).

when I tell my granddad that my kind of socializing is playing a game with a group of friends over the internet he basically tells me that I'm insane and that I should go see a doctor and that playing and talking with friends online is nothing compared to the ACTUAL social experience I get when I meet people in person. It would make me mentally ill and I would become sad and depressed if my only form of social interaction was via online games.

that's what he's been telling me for the past 10 years now and I'm still doing just fine gaming online with my friends.

my question for you: what ARE the differences between these two ways of socializing: Poker in a pub vs. Gaming in a group?

I just don't see any. In World of Warcraft, for example, new friendships are made every day, people laugh with each other, people help each other out, people are getting married...

Yes, you can't physically see the other person but what difference does that make? I've been to school for 10 years, I've attended many real life events and so have you and everyone else. I know when someone is happy and I know when someone is sad. I don't have to go to a pub and play Poker in order to improve my social skills or my empathy. Sorry for the rant but it makes me a little mad that literally no one of the older generations seems to understand this.

am I wrong or do you feel the same?

[Vargulf the Happy Husky]

i've played in many poker games, i've played in many raid groups. you certainly make friends and enemies in both, but there's something about the face to face that beats running around with someones avatar.

couldn't find a poker game, so i actually found a rpg table top game to play with my friends. we get together 1-2 times a month.

what i'm getting at is even though i have friends online, i still ultimately wanted bro time where we could drink beers and smoke.

[Deleted]

Yeah, without the face-to-face element you might as well be talking to an AI bot.

[Super Kami Dende]

The best thing about Gaming online is as soon as I'm bored or ready for Bed I can just disappear.

[LiiLoSNK]

For the same reason that gaming in a group is more fun during like a LAN party. Actually being around living beings is more natural for most people. It's easier to talk without being talked over in a VOIP and you can have separate conversations as the same time as other people without having to type while other people are talking.

On the other side, sometimes people just want to relax in their pc chair and chat online without having to drive around and hang out in a loud public area.

They're 2 different things entirely and 1 type of person can very easily enjoy both. There's extremely obvious reasons for which style of gaming you would want to do depending on how you feel.

The topic may as well be, "What's better using a spoon or using a fork?".

[Lochton]

The only actual difference I've noticed is behavior. The attitude of people are way different between the two. Only difference, well, maybe the aspect of leaving your home too.

[Spectral]

I play online games with some of my friends from back home that are difficult to get together with. I find this to be a decent substitute for getting together in person, but it's not actually the same thing.

Gaming with strangers online isn't remotely comparable to in person interaction though. It's a pale imitation that's consistent my general impression of our society as atomized and lonely. I wouldn't say enjoying it is mental illness, but not understanding the substantial difference between in person interaction and online gaming does strike me as somewhat pathological; perhaps it's just a reflection of the low expectations of community that our generation typically feels though.

[melodramocracy]

I'm ashamed to admit that I don't know how to play poker, so gaming in a group it is.

[Crackleslap]

Much prefer gaming in person. Me & my friends (3 others) get together at my mates house every Thursday and play whatever. Be it video or board games. Just came back from games night! We played 7 days to die tonight.

[Independent voter]

What's missing in online games is facial expressions. If everyone uses a web cam you can get around this but then it takes up part of your screen.

Playing in a pub sounds expensive af. Food and drinks would cost a lot I'd think.

In the US we mostly meet and play at our homes.

[Strawberry]

The difference is that while playing Poker, you could grab a chair and smash it at the guys face if you find yourself unjustly treated.
In video games, you can't.

Both are social interactions, but the way people treat each other while online gaming and socialising in real life is vastly different. People lose respect when they don't see each other.

Your grandad is right. Online gaming is fine, but have at least as much social interaction in real life.

[Endus]

With in-person interactions, there's two major components that you don't get in online interactions.

The first is body language and facial expressions. Communication is arguably not even primarily verbal. There's a ton of context and inflection that your body language and expression provide that you simply can't get over a voice chat system. You can get around that with Skype or the like; I have a D&D group I play with regularly over Skype, but outside of pen-and-paper gaming, it's unlikely you're using video chat over voice chat.

The second is people giving a shit. In person, with people you know, you're way more likely to moderate yourself to avoid pissing people off unduly. There's potential consequences in your friends group if you don't, even from people other than whoever you pissed off. That kind of cascade effect makes you think twice before saying something that might offend. In an online game, even if it's a guild raid group, you can always get a new guild, generally. The same kind of social risk doesn't exist, and this generally leads to people being less filtered and more abrasive. This doesn't mean you can't become friends with guild mates and the like, but it's not remotely as easy as it can be in person.

[Forgettable]

There is a difference. I say this as someone who has done both, extensively.

Sometimes it's beneficial to trade some of the authenticity of a real-world interaction for the convenience of playing online. Personally though, I would never pick one side and disregard the other. That's folly, because they both have value.

[tumppu]

I enjoy both, as I consider them different kinds of socializing. Sometimes more of one vs. the other.

[suger1368]

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[batuhandemirtas]

So Ive played alot of poker and gaming in a group as well. Poker or board games for that matter have room for debates and off topic conversations while the other players take their turn. Also theres a huge difference in being physically present because your tone and gesture as you talk matters alot in how the other person perceives you. You may realize at some point that when youre in a group of people present physically after not having experienced it for a while, you may feel socially awkward or wont know how to contribute to a topic. All you can think about at that point is that you miss your ONLINE friends.

[GreenJesus]

The difference is that while playing Poker, you could grab a chair and smash it at the guys face if you find yourself unjustly treated.
In video games, you can't.

Both are social interactions, but the way people treat each other while online gaming and socialising in real life is vastly different. People lose respect when they don't see each other.

Your grandad is right. Online gaming is fine, but have at least as much social interaction in real life.

That's easy. Everyone gets a vibrator in their ass. If someone in the group wants to punish someone then they press the button. Can have an app linked with each other. Just a fun little activity for the bros.

[Grimbold21]

Amusing that these necros are nearly always made by 1 post accounts

[Calfredd]

Amusing that these necros are nearly always made by 1 post accounts

And people trying to rush 10 posts so they can add links to their ad sites.