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  1. #21
    I find the only people as obnoxious as the "I'm a parent so I'm special" crowd are the "I'm childfree so I'm special" crowd. Both ends have their annoying members.

    You have kids? Good for you, move along.

    You don't have kids? Good for you, move along.
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  2. #22
    Quote Originally Posted by Oakshana View Post
    Dude. I am 51. I had a kid with my (then) girlfriend when i was 43. It was exhausting then. I couldn't imagine at 48 lol.

    Having a kid is awesome if you are excited for it, but I am sending you all of my positive thoughts for extra energy.
    I know it will be hard, but my woman is great she is a real rock and so happy to finally be pregnant.

  3. #23
    Banned Saninicus's Avatar
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    My dad is damn near begging me for kids. But I'm having trouble supporting me. I couldn't imagine kids on top of that. Good thing guilt trips don't work on me.

  4. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by Stelio Kontos View Post
    I find the only people as obnoxious as the "I'm a parent so I'm special" crowd are the "I'm childfree so I'm special" crowd. Both ends have their annoying members.

    You have kids? Good for you, move along.

    You don't have kids? Good for you, move along.
    I have never meet a person that doesn't have kids actively tell people with kids they are wrong. But have meet so many parents telling me and my ex we should have kids and it will make our lives better.
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  5. #25
    Quote Originally Posted by Bodonius View Post
    I know it will be hard, but my woman is great she is a real rock and so happy to finally be pregnant.
    I am really happy for your both. As long as you are a rock for her, it's going to be good.

    Just... remember when he/she's a teenager that he cannot help but say and do stupid things. We've all been there

  6. #26
    The Undying Gehco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deathknightish View Post
    Someone says that he/she does not want any children, and immediately the parental defence brigade arrives. "You'll mature someday and know better!", "Children are the best thing the world has to offer!", "WHY DO YOU HATE CHILDREN?!?" and "I thought I used to be happpy, but when I got my child I realise I was a miserable mess!" are things I've heard.

    Why is it difficult for some parents to understand that some people simply don't want any children?
    I want a relationship, but no children, and I'm getting sick and tired on having to defend myself from angry parents who seem to have lost all ability to see things from other's point of view the moment their little poop monster popped out.
    Nothing about guilt tripping. It is genetic, all the way down the bloodline that programmed in the minds of humans is that we are to develop ourselves, and further our advancement, among that is the act of reproduction. A major part of our culture is about passing the bloodlines.

    Nowadays it may feel like guilt tripping but it has become a stronger choice for people to live their lives without children due to many reasons, among them - successfulness, passing responsibility to others, 'freedom', and that they don't want a smaller creation to rely on them.
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  7. #27
    The Unstoppable Force Queen of Hamsters's Avatar
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    If someone can be guilt tripped into putting humans into this world, that person deserves an award for stupidity beyond belief.
    Some people have children and do a good job. Some people have children and do a rotten job. Others don't have children, and that's fine too.

    I've heard the "If you just had one, you'd love it!"-line from so many people in the past 18 years. My conviction remains.
    Last edited by Queen of Hamsters; 2019-06-14 at 09:39 PM.
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  8. #28
    Quote Originally Posted by Oakshana View Post
    I am really happy for your both. As long as you are a rock for her, it's going to be good.

    Just... remember when he/she's a teenager that he cannot help but say and do stupid things. We've all been there
    If im still alive then lol, Every time s/he start acting disrespectful we will say you like going to live with grandmom in philippines

  9. #29
    Idk. I’m a parent and I don’t do that. Don’t have kids. The world is already overpopulated so imo you’re doing the world a favor.
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  10. #30
    I have heard time and again from girls who said they never want kids, and then they have a kid and realize its the best thing ever and then they want more.
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  11. #31
    Mine don’t but I’ve heard horror stories of parents guilting their daughters as early as 14yo. Some parents like to scam and this is the easiest way to grab cs checks. When it’s that early, it’s not about the kids.

    Now in the 20s-30s range, I can see why. Parents are on the verge of death(ya know 20-30years remaining) and want to see their grandchildren grow up.

  12. #32
    not every one wants the kids they have but if they say how they really feel they'll be told they're shitty parents even if they're not because its inconceivable that parents simply can't dislike their kids

    they see people without kids doing all sorts of cool things they can't do because they have spawn and they're jealous so they try to play up how wonderful it is to have kids because they want those people to suffer the same as them. (not all but most I'm sure actually feel this way)

    they also just assume that people who don't have kids don't want them when in reality a lot of people want kids but CANT have them. NEVER assume that just because someone doesn't have kids it means they don't want them.
    We cannot go back. That's why it's hard to choose. You have to make the right choice. As long as you don't choose, everything remains possible.

  13. #33
    The Unstoppable Force Queen of Hamsters's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kokolums View Post
    I have heard time and again from girls who said they never want kids, and then they have a kid and realize its the best thing ever and then they want more.
    Then they weren't genuine, more likely trying to get attention by "going against the stream" or expectations. Pretty common for teenagers to "hate children", in their own words, for example.

    The crowd of people choosing to never have children grows steadily in the West.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Usernameforforums View Post
    Mine don’t but I’ve heard horror stories of parents guilting their daughters as early as 14yo. Some parents like to scam and this is the easiest way to grab cs checks. When it’s that early, it’s not about the kids.

    Now in the 20s-30s range, I can see why. Parents are on the verge of death(ya know 20-30years remaining) and want to see their grandchildren grow up.
    My grandmother started her grooming for great grandchildren when I was 15. She had her first at 16, my mom had her first at 18. Now she has 2 great grandchildren from one of my brothers, and still she's trying to groom me. She's from the old world, where you either had children as a woman, or you were a spinster with no husband, no value, no means.
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  14. #34
    My mom screamed, complained, bitched, and moaned for kids, my brother gave her 4 grandchildren back to back and only wants to see them once a month. Id say its a cure for boredom for your parents but when others say have kids theyre just jealous because youre not dealing with the parenting responsibilities.

  15. #35
    Quote Originally Posted by Queen of Hamsters View Post
    Then they weren't genuine, more likely trying to get attention by "going against the stream" or expectations.

    The crowd of people choosing to never have children grows steadily in the West.
    I never wanted kids. Got pregnant by accident and I think it was the best thing that could have happened in my life. My girls gave me more meaning to my life, and for that, I’m forever grateful.
    “Fairy tales are more than true – not because they tell us dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten.” - G. K. Chesterton & Neil Gaiman
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  16. #36
    Quote Originally Posted by Deathknightish View Post
    Why is it difficult for some parents to understand that some people simply don't want any children?
    to echo what others have said, it seems to be largely about jealousy or some kind of self-defense mechanism because their lives are so fucking miserable and they have to try to elevate it to this saintly tier in order to make sense of it. also, misery loving company and all that.

    at 40 now i've taken to be aggressively shit-giving to people with kids *if* they bring it up (i don't preach at random strangers, but at the office or in whatever social setting if someone brings up kids then tries to start the lecturing i fire back) - i have found that just saying "what am i doing this weekend? or, sleeping in and not putting on pants. i can do that, because unlike you i made a series of intelligent and responsible life choices" and that usually shuts them directly the hell up.

  17. #37
    The Unstoppable Force Queen of Hamsters's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Winter Blossom View Post
    I never wanted kids. Got pregnant by accident and I think it was the best thing that could have happened in my life. My girls gave me more meaning to my life, and for that, I’m forever grateful.
    As someone 100% convinced, I've taken measures to never get pregnant.
    Hell, I'm pro-choice but I know myself that had I gotten pregnant, I might not have been able to have an abortion, which scared me into action.

    Getting accidentally pregnant and having it turn out to be a boon for one's life isn't that uncommon, and children are lucky to be born into such loving homes. My brother never saw himself as a dad. He wasn't outright against the idea, but didn't actively pursue it. Then he met his wife, got pregnant, and on that road they are.
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  18. #38
    Well it isn't a popular opinion but I believe they are trying to help ever increasing generations to find a fulling life and happiness. A lot of people live utterly destructive lives filled with hedonistic pleasures that cannot last and eventually burns them out.

  19. #39
    The Lightbringer crakerjack's Avatar
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    I've never met an adult pressuring me to have kids, but then again I'm not in a relationship nor do I have the financial security to support anyone other than myself.
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  20. #40
    Quote Originally Posted by Queen of Hamsters View Post
    As someone 100% convinced, I've taken measures to never get pregnant.
    Hell, I'm pro-choice but I know myself that had I gotten pregnant, I might not have been able to have an abortion, which scared me into action.

    Getting accidentally pregnant and having it turn out to be a boon for one's life isn't that uncommon, and children are lucky to be born into such loving homes. My brother never saw himself as a dad. He wasn't outright against the idea, but didn't actively pursue it. Then he met his wife, got pregnant, and on that road they are.
    Yeah, I’m also pro-choice but I personally wouldn’t be able to get an abortion, which is why after the second kid (also an accident) I decided I needed a more permanent solution so I didn’t have more. I’m happy with just the two, and I think it worked out well because they have each other, you know? I couldn’t imagine being an only child. I love my sisters dearly.
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