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  1. #41
    I am Murloc! shadowmouse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mayhem
    A very interesting bit of insight into foreign cultures.
    If you find it interesting, you might enjoy The Geography of Thought. After that, maybe branch out to the Lewis model; I forget the title of his book though.

    Edit: Sorry, your post popped up as I was replying to Mayhem.

    Quote Originally Posted by lagiacrux
    can you please give me a link where i can read up about this.
    Here's the book: https://www.amazon.com/Geography-Tho.../dp/0743255356

    Here's a bit from a university. With my search engines hamstrung, I'm linking the first one that gave me a short, linkable page. I haven't picked Pacific as a particular expert in the field: https://www2.pacific.edu/sis/culture...igh_and_Lo.htm

    Here's something for the Lewis Model: https://www.crossculture.com/about-us/the-model/
    Last edited by shadowmouse; 2019-12-03 at 11:52 AM.
    "No one -- however smart, however well-educated, however experienced -- is the suppository of all wisdom"

    Sixty years. One sexagenary cycle complete, a new adventure awaits.
    shadowmouse, previously bungeebungee

  2. #42
    Quote Originally Posted by bungeebungee View Post
    Or I know my audience here and from other threads know most don't have a clue about cross culture communication and differences between Asia and Europe or North America. Let me throw that out there to the other guy too: @jakeic

    Look at pretty much any thread with @Katie N or @Freighter posting in it and what you'll see is post after post of people who get all bent out of shape and expect live in Vietnam or South Korea ought to work just the same as life in Germany, Finland, or Sweden.

    So, I'll assume you are both doing your obligatory snark for +1, but go hit Google and check out Hall's description of high and low context cultures. That's the "context" I refer to in what you've quoted. OP was asking a question that applied to a specific situation --getting along in Taiwan, which is high context. Most of the replies were based on low context, with an emphasis on individualism. In particular, I replied to a Swedish poster (Sweden being famously low context) that @Haidaes had already told about Asian culture, and been subsequently been blown off. Why? Because in Sweden we do it this way. Point was missed by such a wide margin that if she were on the range she wouldn't have even been firing towards the target.
    That some people won't understand the answer is obvious, that's true of all answers to all questions. Now you're trying to change the subject, so I continue to snarkily assume you don't have that deep of an understanding on the subject.

  3. #43
    Quote Originally Posted by Sulli Su View Post
    Do you just say you don't feel like drinking? What is your approach to it without offending someone?
    Just say no. It's really as simple as that people just overthink things.

  4. #44
    Banned matheney2k's Avatar
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    By saying no?

    Why is that so hard?

  5. #45
    Quote Originally Posted by matheney2k View Post
    By saying no?
    Why is that so hard?
    Sometime seen as an insult, depending on cultural perspective.

  6. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shadowferal View Post
    Sometime seen as an insult, depending on cultural perspective.
    The only culture I know of where hearing no is an insult would be rape culture LMAO


    Jkjk, but say no thank you then if you worry about possible offense. Declining unwanted offers or invitations should not be such a hardship I think

  7. #47
    I am Murloc! shadowmouse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zaktar
    Now you're trying to change the subject, so I continue to snarkily assume you don't have that deep of an understanding on the subject.
    OK, wonderboy, what do you think the subject is? Are we following the question posted in the OP, the question I was replying to when you quoted me, or some other question that you've failed to define clearly?

    Quote Originally Posted by Zaktar
    That some people won't understand the answer is obvious, that's true of all answers to all questions.
    What remains is *why* a person did not understand. Telling a person "that shirt is blue" could leave them scratching their head, taking out a series of color samples might seem and answer, but it isn't going to work if they're color blind.
    "No one -- however smart, however well-educated, however experienced -- is the suppository of all wisdom"

    Sixty years. One sexagenary cycle complete, a new adventure awaits.
    shadowmouse, previously bungeebungee

  8. #48
    Quote Originally Posted by bungeebungee View Post
    OK, wonderboy, what do you think the subject is? Are we following the question posted in the OP, the question I was replying to when you quoted me, or some other question that you've failed to define clearly?



    What remains is *why* a person did not understand. Telling a person "that shirt is blue" could leave them scratching their head, taking out a series of color samples might seem and answer, but it isn't going to work if they're color blind.
    Good grief is it really that difficult for you to follow? OP asked how to politely refuse a drink, another user explained that it would be akin to social suicide, someone else asked why it is different in the culture local to you than it is to their home culture, you made a rather snide remark, I called you out in an effort to persuade you to actually answer their question. Which you still apparently can't. Usually people who hide behind the, "if you have to ask you wouldn't understand" defense don't actually have a clue what they're talking about

  9. #49
    Accept the invitation and tell them you will be the designated driver.

    They will probably tell you just not to come.

    Mission accomplished.

  10. #50
    I am Murloc! shadowmouse's Avatar
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    Edit: Post had an echo.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Zaktar
    someone else asked why it is different in the culture local to you than it is to their home culture
    Seems others followed my answer just fine, @Mayhem for example. I've explained in detail, with links. Post #7, well before the post you quoted:

    Random fellow expat? Turn it down politely as others have said.
    If things play more or less the same as on the mainland, if it is work related you may want to at least go along to be "part of the group". The Taiwanese guys I've had business dealings with take your willingness to have tea, share a meal, or drink with them pretty seriously.
    It seems to play as it would on the mainland, that if you drink together you're supposedly showing your real self, and business works on personal relationships. Think twice about dealing yourself out completely.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Sol
    Why would it be different?
    Quote Originally Posted by Haidaes
    Because it's a social obligation in many Asian countries, especially among collegues after work or even during, in case of business meetings. There is really no equivalent in the west. Just saying no might have negative implications for your social and/or work life.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Sol
    Pff, you're seen as odd in sweden if you keep declining when people from work invite you. Which may result in differential treatment. You can still say no.
    Now, that Pfff follows my post explaining 1)if it is work related you may want to at least go along to be "part of the group" and 2)It seems to play as it would on the mainland, that if you drink together you're supposedly showing your real self, and business works on personal relationships.[/Quote] It also follows another poster giving the short answer version of the same points. And still the answer is to say how things are in Sweden (way out there for low context) while ignoring that Taiwan is not Sweden.

    At that point it is clear, the person asking cannot imagine a place where things don't work as they do in Sweden and is failing to do even basic research to check what they've already been told several times. Even so, I went a bit further than you seem to have read:
    You'll know the words, but you'll lack context. Maybe you will find something about your life where you are and others will tell you "just X" but somehow "just X" misses things about your environment. His question is a bit like that.
    Hope that answers your question. Btw, bothering to type out Pff is dismissive enough that it gets answered in the same tone.
    Last edited by shadowmouse; 2019-12-04 at 11:08 AM.
    "No one -- however smart, however well-educated, however experienced -- is the suppository of all wisdom"

    Sixty years. One sexagenary cycle complete, a new adventure awaits.
    shadowmouse, previously bungeebungee

  11. #51
    In my country, we have a culture of offering drinks.

    But it is considered extremly rude to decline a drink because it's like saying you are not interesting to me for me to sit down with you and have a drink.

    I simply just ask for water & be done with it.

  12. #52
    I am Murloc! Zuben's Avatar
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    "Can't make it today, sorry." People mostly have the good sense to leave it at that, but sometimes they inquire what's up. I don't think it's anyone's business why I can't make it. I have prior engagement, that's all the information they need.
    Now you see it. Now you don't.

  13. #53
    There's never a time I decline an invitation to drink as long as it's with family or friends but in your case just be like "nah man I'm good but thanks" and that's it. If they get offended by you saying something like that then they have problems.
    I'd buy that for a dollar.

  14. #54
    Quote Originally Posted by Sulli Su View Post
    Do you just say you don't feel like drinking? What is your approach to it without offending someone?
    Medical condition seems to be a common thing i've heard. *i'm taking medicine right now and not allowed to drink* I know women that don't drink when they are menstrating.
    The hunter hoe with the least beloe.

  15. #55
    Quote Originally Posted by KOUNTERPARTS View Post
    "How do you wipe? Front to back or side to side?"
    Don't be assinine. The obvious choice is putting a heap of toilet paper on the floor and just bouncing on it up and down.

  16. #56
    I have made prior commitments. Goes home and puts on netflix*

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