Marriage: I do or I don’t

[Bodonius]

I would have gotten married last summer but city hall was closed during the summer... We will probably do it sometime since there is some benefits (not many) and its important for her relatives, but for us it doesnt really matter much. Sign a paper here then have a party on Philippines the next time we go there.

We have a kid, thats bigger the wedding we are forever stuck together ;-) and I dont complain

[LilSaihah]

I'd love to get married but I honestly don't really see the benefit unless I marry a foreigner and it'll make their immigration easier, or my emigration easier.

[Draco-Onis]

So get a wife who makes as much as you do and voila the problem is gone.

Divorces are known to be painfully spiteful affairs and it doesn't really matter what she makes US law heavily favors women and if kids are involved you have nearly zero chance of getting custody.

[Seirith]

Divorces are known to be painfully spiteful affairs and it doesn't really matter what she makes US law heavily favors women and if kids are involved you have nearly zero chance of getting custody.

And a break up of a long term couple, with or without children is not spiteful as well?

If more people acted like adults when ending a relationship and thinking about their children instead of themselves, there would not be as many "spiteful" breakups. This obviously excludes abuse, in that case take your children and get as far away ASAP.

[Draco-Onis]

And a break up of a long term couple, with or without children is not spiteful as well?

If more people acted like adults when ending a relationship and thinking about their children instead of themselves, there would not be as many "spiteful" breakups. This obviously excludes abuse, in that case take your children and get as far away ASAP.

Now imagine that breakup with lawyers and courts, I mentioned the children because it adds to alimony and child support. I mean relationships are hard enough without adding the law into it.

[NineSpine]

Divorces are known to be painfully spiteful affairs and it doesn't really matter what she makes US law heavily favors women and if kids are involved you have nearly zero chance of getting custody.

That's a myth.

[Draco-Onis]

That's a myth.

Unless there are mitigating circumstances children are more than likely to end up with their mothers than their fathers.

[NineSpine]

Unless there are mitigating circumstances children are more than likely to end up with their mothers than their fathers.

There is no such thing as a custody arrangement without "mitigating circumstances". Each situation is unique.

It's a myth.

[Draco-Onis]

There is no such thing as a custody arrangement without "mitigating circumstances". Each situation is unique.

It's a myth.

uhuh you just keep telling yourself that.

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/are-c...s-bia_b_870709

https://www.census.gov/content/dam/C...mo/P60-255.pdf

https://www.cor-law.com/blog/women-g...imination.html

[NineSpine]

uhuh you just keep telling yourself that.

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/are-c...s-bia_b_870709

https://www.census.gov/content/dam/C...mo/P60-255.pdf

https://www.cor-law.com/blog/women-g...imination.html

I hate to break this to you, but over 90% of custody cases are decided without intervention from the family court system. This terrible, horrible, no-good, man-hating system you are trying to blame everything on is really just parents deciding of their own accord that the mother should have primary custody more often than the father.

[Draco-Onis]

I hate to break this to you, but over 90% of custody cases are decided without intervention from the family court system. This terrible, horrible, no-good, man-hating system you are trying to blame everything on is really just parents deciding of their own accord that the mother should have primary custody more often than the father.

uhuh

/10 char

[NineSpine]

uhuh

/10 char

Yeah, it's tough when the facts obliterate your case.

[Draco-Onis]

Yeah, it's tough when the facts obliterate your case.

uhuh

/10 char

[tankbug]

I got married, and it was the happiest day of my live. Friends and family, all having a kickass time. Partied until sunrise!
I don't think it really matters when you get married, just make sure that you choose the right venue/concept for the season.
It feels a little different to be married, and I like it.

[NineSpine]

uhuh

/10 char

https://www.apa.org/practice/guidelines/child-custody

"When parents agree to a child custody arrangement on their own — as they do in the overwhelming majority (90%) of cases (Melton, Petrila, Poythress, & Slobogin, 2007) — there may be no dispute for the court to decide."

Being sarcastic won't make you right. It just makes you look childish and intransigent, a person unwilling to change their mind because they've wrapped their identity up in a factually wrong idea.

[Draco-Onis]

Being sarcastic won't make you right. It just makes you look childish and intransigent, a person unwilling to change their mind because they've wrapped their identity up in a factually wrong idea.

But being childish was the point since the census statistics about single parents with custody made my point for me but you still haven't figured it out yet.

[NineSpine]

But being childish was the point since the census statistics about single parents with custody made my point for me but you still haven't figured it out yet.

Your point is that the system favors mothers getting custody, but in the real world more than 90% of custody arrangements are decided WITHOUT the system and in those cases, the mother gets custody the majority of the time. This means the issue may simply be the preference, which is also reinforced by the fact that even when both parents work the mother tends to spend twice as much time raising the children as the father does.

[Fahrenheit]

Get married to an awesome person that you have a load in common with.
Both work in successful careers.
Don't have kids.
Live within your means.
Invest like crazy.
Retire at 55 with 'fuck you' levels of money then do whatever the fuck you want.

[Draco-Onis]

Your point is that the system favors mothers getting custody, but in the real world more than 90% of custody arrangements are decided WITHOUT the system and in those cases, the mother gets custody the majority of the time. This means the issue may simply be the preference, which is also reinforced by the fact that even when both parents work the mother tends to spend twice as much time raising the children as the father does.

I hate to state the obvious but you are basically saying 90% of fathers don't want primary custody of their children, why do you think that is? maybe just maybe the lawyers are telling the fathers the reality that the have no shot. It's either one of two things fathers don't want it or the system is so against them that they are better off just giving up. Which do you think is the most likely scenario? guys don't want it or they advised that is the best course?

[NineSpine]

Get married to an awesome person that you have a load in common with.
Both work in successful careers.
Don't have kids.
Live within your means.
Invest like crazy.
Retire at 55 and do whatever the fuck you want.

Putting all of your money into investments is an absolutely terrible idea in this day and age.