1. #1

    [Movie] Disney's Artemis Fowl

    In Theaters May 29, Disney's adaptation of Artemis Fowl, based on the beloved book by Eoin Colfer, directed by Kenneth Branagh and starring Colin Farrell, Judi Dench and Josh Gad.

    Personally never read the books, the setup seems interesting but the story sounds hella generic judging from the trailer.
    It seems the books readers are largely disappointed as well, reading the youtube comments.


  2. #2
    Could they have cast a more wooden, less interesting lead child actor? Like, whoa. I know this is for kids but it's been a long time since I've been so totally disinterested in a movie just off the trailer.

    It's nice to see Sister Night is still getting work though. :^)

  3. #3
    Scarab Lord Skizzit's Avatar
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    They completely removed the single interesting thing about the character and series, the fact that Artemis isn't a hero. He is the son of a crimelord and only gets involved with the magical creatures because he wants to steal their secrets and ends up helping them mostly reluctantly. He also finds all about the magic world completely on his own, not as some hand me down from his father. Now it looks like it is the same boy genius, chosen one crap as every other similar series. Too bad. Could have been a fun series.

  4. #4
    hmf...read the first book when it first came out.
    Nope!
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  5. #5
    It's a book meant for children. If you expect anything more than "generic" you're doing it wrong.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by StillMcfuu View Post
    It's a book meant for children. If you expect anything more than "generic" you're doing it wrong.
    Harry Potter was for children too.
    But my older ass got a kick reading those books.
    Acquittal doesn't mean exoneration


  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by StillMcfuu View Post
    It's a book meant for children. If you expect anything more than "generic" you're doing it wrong.
    Children cannot enjoy a little more complex storylines ? They have to be fed the exact same simple story with different backgrounds so that they understand ?
    You're underestimating children.

  8. #8
    Not gonna lie, trailer is pretty terrible.
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  9. #9
    For some reason I've heard of the name Artemis Fowl before but I thought the character and his books were from like the late 1800's early 1900's and he was a young to middle aged-ish man so the trailer threw me for a look and I had to wiki him.

    Trailer seems ok I guess.

  10. #10
    Bloodsail Admiral Denizly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Skizzit View Post
    They completely removed the single interesting thing about the character and series, the fact that Artemis isn't a hero.
    My exact thoughts, like sure you can try to put book 1 and 2 in same movie to make him get an early redemption, but come the F on, straight up removing the "he's bad" part is bull.

  11. #11
    I am Murloc! DrMcNinja's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Denizly View Post
    My exact thoughts, like sure you can try to put book 1 and 2 in same movie to make him get an early redemption, but come the F on, straight up removing the "he's bad" part is bull.
    But think of the children! They couldn't watch an evil child in a movie!

  12. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Ophenia View Post
    Children cannot enjoy a little more complex storylines ? They have to be fed the exact same simple story with different backgrounds so that they understand ?
    You're underestimating children.
    We're getting to the point in society that people are growing up slower (mentally) than previous generations, and "talking down" to children is probably a large factor. This kind of translates into many movies that are meant for children that end up being so dumbed down that they don't even invoke any level of thinking from their audiences, regardless of age. It's pretty bad in many Disney films as of late, where you always get that one character that has the mandatory role of exposition right after an event occurs while stories/events themselves are insanely safe and simple already. If the children are too young to understand some level of complexity and thought, at worst they probably don't even care about what's going on anyways... at best it actually invokes their curiosity to try to understand what's going on.

    With respect to the trailer... yeah, I predict extremely bad child acting and TONS of unnecessary exposition, with a dash of dodging anything that may seem offensive or controversial for the most silly reasons.
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  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Skizzit View Post
    They completely removed the single interesting thing about the character and series, the fact that Artemis isn't a hero. He is the son of a crimelord and only gets involved with the magical creatures because he wants to steal their secrets and ends up helping them mostly reluctantly. He also finds all about the magic world completely on his own, not as some hand me down from his father. Now it looks like it is the same boy genius, chosen one crap as every other similar series. Too bad. Could have been a fun series.
    Nailed it.

    I doubt they can nail the atmosphere as well, that stuff in Russia later on is pure gold.

  14. #14
    This isn't Artemis Fowl. Seriously in what fucking world is Holly his ally on the other side from the beginning.

  15. #15
    Merely a Setback Queen of Hamsters's Avatar
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    How to ruin a franchise before it's even out 1:1.
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  16. #16
    Scarab Lord Skizzit's Avatar
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    Looks like the movie really is pretty much doomed from the start. Disney announced that they are not even going to bother pushing back it's release date in theaters and is just going to drop it onto Disney+ instead:
    https://news.avclub.com/artemis-fowl...ney-1842669229

    Pretty much zero chance of it getting a continuation now. They really should have just made it a Disney+ series from the start. And actually, you know, stuck to the actual story of the books.

  17. #17
    Legendary! Flurryfang's Avatar
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    So instead of making it a cool richy rich story about a badass kid, who took on the entire magical world, we get a "its your destiny" crap? O.o

    How is this any different than Percy Jackson? O.o
    May the lore be great and the stories interesting. A game without a story, is a game without a soul. Value the lore and it will reward you with fun!

    Don't let yourself be satisfied with what you expect and what you seem as obvious. Ask for something good, surprising and better. Your own standards ends up being other peoples standard.

  18. #18
    The Lightbringer Lazuli's Avatar
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    Just another 'make movie based on a book, but ruin and change the story, completely defeating the purpose of basing it on books' trope.
    LOL

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    I think we may be waiting a long time for that to happen. Maybe even forever.

  19. #19
    Pandaren Monk Tabrotar's Avatar
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    So another franchise Disney is ruining, color me suprised about that... not.

    And the books are great, but this abomination isn´t even worth to have the same name as the books.

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