1. #1
    Void Lord Doctor Amadeus's Avatar
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    The Government just asks you to save the world...


    The Government just asks you to risk your life to save the world there is a next to 80% Chance you will not survive afterwards, what are 3 things you'd ask for in return?

    1. $100 Billion Dollars
    2. My Own Private Island
    3. No Taxes, I think Bruce was on to something here.



    Bonus Question:

    The earth's population is going to be considerably lowered, YOU HAVE TO SAVE a Kardashian, Which one would you pick and why?

    Khloe because she is the only one I never hear anything about
    Milli Vanilli, Bigger than Elvis

  2. #2
    1. Full access to the federal reserve with an uncapped Credit Card...
    2. The power to completely ban people from the internet I so choose. That kid trolling me? Lifetime ban!
    3. Full access to all government secrets, just to sate one's curiosity. Are there aliens!?

    Bonus - absolutely none of them
    Last edited by Daedius; 2020-08-19 at 07:11 AM.

  3. #3
    Merely a Setback PACOX's Avatar
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    Imma tell the government no that it should do its job. Unless I actually work for the government, it works for me, not the other way around.

    Resident Cosplay Progressive

  4. #4
    Pit Lord smityx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doctor Amadeus View Post

    The Government just asks you to risk your life to save the world there is a next to 80% Chance you will not survive afterwards, what are 3 things you'd ask for in return?

    1. $100 Billion Dollars
    2. My Own Private Island
    3. No Taxes, I think Bruce was on to something here.



    Bonus Question:

    The earth's population is going to be considerably lowered, YOU HAVE TO SAVE a Kardashian, Which one would you pick and why?

    Khloe because she is the only one I never hear anything about
    Hmm let's see. 20% survival chance and saving the world and 7.6 BILLION people or 100% total annihilation of the entire human species if I don't including me. I'll have to think long and hard on that one. Plus I wouldn't do it for the rewards. Maybe just a promise my family would be cared for if I succeeded in stopping the problem but died in the process.

  5. #5
    I'd beg for them to seek out someone that's actually qualified.

  6. #6
    Half Life 3 confirmed.

  7. #7
    Pit Lord smityx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queen of Hamsters View Post
    I'd beg for them to seek out someone that's actually qualified.
    I think the premise is that they decided you were the most qualified for the task at hand.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Yuujin View Post
    Half Life 3 confirmed.
    But not before guild housing and a dance studio in WoW.

  8. #8
    Herald of the Titans Tuor's Avatar
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    If i could help, i would... But please, not suicidal missions.

    BONUS POST:

    GET_OUT_OF_THE_NUCLEAR_WARHEAD

    So sorry, i had to do the joke .

  9. #9
    Well, they already owe me big for the job done earlier
    ...and now it's again imperiled?

  10. #10
    The Insane draynay's Avatar
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    Are your threads just random word associations?

    I'm not saving anybody.
    /s

  11. #11
    The Undying
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doctor Amadeus View Post

    The Government just asks you to risk your life to save the world there is a next to 80% Chance you will not survive afterwards, what are 3 things you'd ask for in return?

    1. $100 Billion Dollars
    2. My Own Private Island
    3. No Taxes, I think Bruce was on to something here.



    Bonus Question:

    The earth's population is going to be considerably lowered, YOU HAVE TO SAVE a Kardashian, Which one would you pick and why?

    Khloe because she is the only one I never hear anything about
    Great question(s).

    1. $100 Billion
    2. Anonymity (government doesn't tell anyone it was me - tells world I died doing it)
    3. Access to all government databases w/ highest level clearance


    Bonus:
    Khloe, because your reason is as good as any for this.

  12. #12
    Pit Lord smityx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cubby View Post
    Great question(s).

    1. $100 Billion
    2. Anonymity (government doesn't tell anyone it was me - tells world I died doing it)
    3. Access to all government databases w/ highest level clearance


    Bonus:
    Khloe, because your reason is as good as any for this.
    If you required that and they agreed knowing that you most likely wouldn't survive and chances you'd fail and it wouldn't matter anyway but you somehow managed to succeed and survive I can guarantee you they would have Epstien'd or Flight 19'd your ass on the way back home.

  13. #13
    The Unstoppable Force Ghostpanther's Avatar
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    I wouldn't volunteer unless I was 100 years old and then it would be 1 trillion dollars, no taxes forever for all of my descendants. Would be nice and not have a third demand.

    There are no Kardashians to save.
    " If destruction be our lot, we must ourselves be its author and finisher.." - Abraham Lincoln
    The Constitution be never construed to authorize Congress to - prevent the people of the United States, who are peaceable citizens, from keeping their own arms..” - Samuel Adams

  14. #14
    Would it be in poor taste to stipulate the no-Kardashian clause?

  15. #15
    The Lightbringer
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    1.take afew politicians/people that I dislike along for the ride.
    2. My own self sustainable island with internet if I somehow manage to survive.
    3. Don’t really have third one due to my other wish would be to see a nuclear device explode anyway.(I always wanted to witness a nuclear test explosion)

  16. #16
    I would want everything taken care of of my loved ones if i die, that would be my mother and my girlfriend and my animals. No taxes for them and a amount of 100 000$ each month into their accounts untill they die.

    Then i would happily die wherever it is they want.
    Do you hear the voices too?

  17. #17
    If I'm the only one who can save the world, then my requests would be simple.

    1. Forgive all student and medical debt.
    2. Institute UBI so that people aren't having to scrape by to survive.
    3. Adopt a universal healthcare system similar to Canada, Europe, or the hundreds of other countries that have one.

    Because what good is saving everyone if the world is still shit to live in?

  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Nymrohd View Post
    Well you only helped the people in your country, not the billions of people in the world that constitute "Everyone"
    The first one would help people in a whole lot of countries, the second one would help people globally, and the third one would help get the US and the few other stragglers caught up with the rest of the world.

    So they'd help the most people realistically possible, especially those in poor and rural countries, as they'd finally have the income they need to cover necessities which they'd turn around and pay into their community, further boosting their standard of living.

  19. #19
    Save everyone? The way I see it, everyone would owe me their lives then. Say hi to the Queen Goddess of Earth my beloved subjects
    Quote Originally Posted by Jtbrig7390 View Post
    True, I was just bored and tired but you are correct.

    Last edited by Thwart; Today at 05:21 PM. Reason: Infracted for flaming
    Quote Originally Posted by epigramx View Post
    millennials were the kids of the 9/11 survivors.

  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by Doctor Amadeus View Post

    The Government just asks you to risk your life to save the world there is a next to 80% Chance you will not survive afterwards, what are 3 things you'd ask for in return?
    1. I need my family taken care of; probably set up a trust fund so they can live well for generations.
    2. A nice meal.
    3. A nice fuck.


    Bonus Question:

    The earth's population is going to be considerably lowered, YOU HAVE TO SAVE a Kardashian, Which one would you pick and why?

    Khloe because she is the only one I never hear anything about
    The only Kardashian I know is Kim. And I would not recognize her in a lineup. I don't follow too many mainstream trends.

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