The first sign of Stephanie's pregnancy was nausea, as it so often is — that particular debilitating queasiness that knocked her off her feet, sometimes all day, days at a time.
It kept Stephanie, who asked me not to use her real name for all the obvious reasons, from working. She runs her own business in Austin, Texas, braiding hair, a skill she learned as a teenager.
Stephanie, 33, prayed about the pregnancy. She ran through her savings being off work. She thought about the bills a baby would bring, what it would mean for her kids, and for her own future. Then she decided to have an abortion.
"Where I am at in my life, I am on a journey where I am still trying to find myself, trying to be the best mother I can be," she said. "And I feel like it’s hard enough already and I don’t want to bring another child into this world."
After the positive test, she went to a Texas clinic. She was only about six weeks pregnant, but they found a heartbeat and that was that. Suddenly the Texas law was about her, and her future narrowed down to panic and fear.
"Before I went though this situation, I really didn’t care," she said of the Texas law. "But then when it affected me, it was like, 'Oh, s—.' "
She said the clinic basically kicked her out. She was crying, and she went back inside to ask if they knew anyone who could help her. The answer was a hard no. Luckily, a friend persuaded her to call Planned Parenthood in Texas that day, and that clinic got her in touch with the Los Angeles office. She said she was thinking there was no way she could get to California, but her friend told her to make the call anyway, a last-ditch hope.
"Immediately they were so helpful," Stephanie said. "They were concerned. They made me feel good in that moment. Everybody down here just turns up their nose."
The coordinator who handled her call got to work, Stephanie said. Planned Parenthood booked her flights between Texas and L.A. — 1,242 miles each way — and paid for them. They arranged transportation and a hotel — and paid for those, too. They even gave her money to pay for incidentals such as food.
But it was the way they made her feel that she remembers most, "like it wasn't an embarrassment or a shame," she said.
She was at the lowest point in her life and she found "love from strangers," she said.
She flew in on a Monday and had the procedure on a Tuesday, then headed home to her kids the next day. No complications, no drama.
"I didn't expect all this," she said. And that's why she's willing to talk about it. She thinks the Texas law is "trash" but California welcomes those in need.
"I want people to know that in this life you cannot judge anyone," she said. "I also want people to know there is help and support out there. Don’t feel alone, don’t feel embarrassed, do what’s best for you."