1. #15781
    The Northman - 8.5/10

    Argh, this kind of movie is why I hate scoring stuff sometimes. It has some pacing issues, relies somewhat on the viewer's prior knowledge of Norse myths to fully appreciate, some of the fights are not that well choreographed, and the love story is kind of shoe-horned in despite Olga being a decent character in her own right.

    That said I did really like this movie still. I'm a sucker for Norse myths and imagery so the above flaw was not a problem for me. I thoroughly enjoyed the raw, unfiltered look at their customs, legends and morals (or least, as best as we can manage to do more than a millennia later). The theatrical linguistics feel stilted at first, but when you understand that it's part of the film's commitment to bring an ancient saga to the picture it starts working quite well. The actors play their part well, Kidman especially has one scene to really shine and makes the absolute most of it. The story isn't exactly complicated but in this case simplicity is strength, and keeping the action contained around one area and a half dozen characters fits the story quite well. It's beautifully shot and while I said some fights aren't very convincing, others really are, the final one especially is really cool.

    Speaking of the fighting, I truly have no idea how this movie was only 13+ in my neck of the woods. Some of the violence is really raw. Which is only appropriate for the brutal times on display, but still, can't remember the last time I saw a guy visibly disemboweled like this.
    It is all that is left unsaid upon which tragedies are built -Kreia

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  2. #15782
    Titan Orby's Avatar
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    Doctor Strange & The Multiverse of Madness
    6/10

    Marvel/Disney continuing to be uninspiring. Some great visuals like the previous Doctor Strange movie, although it does turn it up more in this one. Benedict Cumberbatch is always great. But its another Marvel movie at this point. Not the worst Marvel movie since End Game, but the quality has been falling since then. I do feel maybe Disney are trying to hit new beats, this movie did feel a bit darker, but they are not hitting for me. Fans of brain dead cinema will love this stuff, turn your brain off and knock yourself out and have a blast, but I got really tired of the MCU over the last 3 years and the movies look tired too, weak plot, uninspiring, 'remember this' tropes, and giving me nothing to grip onto.

    Pretty sure I am going to be torn apart of this review like I was Spiderman: No Way Home, but I am sorry these movies are 'not doing it for me anymore' at worst, and 'barley doing it for' me at best.

    Still looking forward to Thor: Love & Thunder but at this point, I am concerned. But all these MCU movies are making me do, is wanting to go back and read the comics. :P
    Last edited by Orby; 2022-05-08 at 04:07 PM.
    Proof is boring. Proof is tiresome. Proof is irrelevance. People would rather be handed an easy lie than search for a difficult truth, especially when it suits their own purpose.
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    The Last Argument of Kings, The First Law Trilogy.

  3. #15783
    Quote Originally Posted by Jastall View Post
    Speaking of the fighting, I truly have no idea how this movie was only 13+ in my neck of the woods. Some of the violence is really raw. Which is only appropriate for the brutal times on display, but still, can't remember the last time I saw a guy visibly disemboweled like this.
    It wasn’t R rated where I am either. I never bothered looking at its rating until I bought my ticket and was surprised by it. I was actually expecting it to be far more gruesome than it actually was. People were mostly filthy and the dark cinematography also helped cover up some of the viscera.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by hellhamster View Post
    There is nothing wrong with that, but I just can't be bothered to see something regurgitated right now.
    The middling reviews are damping my expectations but most seem to agree that the visuals are excellent and I would like to see excellent visuals on the big screen. I don’t mind shelling out some money for that.

  4. #15784
    Legendary! hellhamster's Avatar
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    Rashomon: 8/10

    The girl did some incredible acting, while Mifune was his usual all over the place self that everyone loves. The premise felt a bit underwhelming, but still an excellent Kurosawa film from start to finish, with a lot of wisdom concerning subjective truths.

  5. #15785
    Quote Originally Posted by hellhamster View Post
    Marvel movie plot:

    1. Main character learns he has superpowers
    2. Has difficulty controlling them at the start and alienates his friends and family
    3. Stakes are (artificially) raised as some galaxy threatening entity arrives in the main character's town just because
    4. Main character loses the first fight
    5. Pulls his shit together, and with the power of friendship with other superpower dudes and dudettes eventually beats the bad guy
    6. All movie quipping and basically acting like a psychopath without a fight or flight instinct, never caring about his personal well-being or showing genuine fear.
    I'm not sure there's a single Marvel movie that meets these criteria, let alone it being a template for all of them. Heck, the very first point eliminates most Marvel movies... I don't think any of them "learned" they have powers (/tech) in their first movie. They all either had them already (Thor, GotG), or earned them (Captain America, Iron Man).

    Even if you're a bit more generous with the interpretation, this really just describes movies in general. "Main character has some issues, situation to be resolved appears, main character doesn't instantly resolve it thus ending the movie, some more stuff happens, situation is eventually resolved".

  6. #15786
    Petite Maman 10/10

    The best newly released film in the US. A masterpiece.

    Yes, I cried like a little baby.

  7. #15787
    Fantastic Beasts 3 8/10

    Best out of the three. Solid movie honestly. I remembered how confused I was watching the second movie so I watched the first two before this, and oh boy what a mess the storytelling is. Very aggressive and dense plot that will pick up storylines that were faintly hinted at two years ago and turn them into main plot. The entire plot of the second movie is basically a red herring. Nagini is in it too for some reason. If you watch them all back to back though it does make sense and the story is pretty good.

    Great cast, great story, and really a more mature expansion of the HP universe. Music is great as always, sets are great, huge budget. It's hard to sell a prequel story that we all know the ending of over more than three movies with two year breaks in between, but so far so good. You can tell JK really loves Dumbledore and these movies are pretty much her love letter to that character.

  8. #15788
    Quote Originally Posted by Fencers View Post
    Petite Maman 10/10

    The best newly released film in the US. A masterpiece.
    Another great movie from Sciamma to go with the superb Portrait of a Lady on Fire.
    "yOu aRe wRoNg" - Darththeo

  9. #15789
    Morbius - 6/10. That was not a great movie. As with the first Venom, I feel like there is probably a cut out there that actually improves what I just watched, but it won't be by a great deal. Works ok enough as an intro, and as the blatant setup for a Sinister Six later down the line, I guess. Not sure I'd watch a Morbius 2.

  10. #15790
    Firestarter (2022) 2/10

    Incredibly lazy cinematography despite working with a bit of a budget. Bad acting across the board. Paper thin entirely unoriginal and predictable plot. Script not even remotely tethered to reality. Everything was probably shot in one or two takes, "meh good enough". If Stephen King was dead he'd be rolling in his grave.

    It gets a point because it made me laugh more than once (the captain's acting behind the glass at the end of the movie!), and an extra point for the 80s synthwave music. I'd give it another point for reminding me of the far superior and quite similar Brightburn (2019) but I'm not that generous.

  11. #15791
    Firestarter 0/10

    Awful, cheap, low budget. Terrible acting, sound design, and editing. Awful cinematography too. No redeeming value.

  12. #15792
    Venom 2 - A 2/10 maybe? I only managed to watch about 35mins of this before I just had to close it. It was awful. Consider the fact I managed to sit through the entirety of Morbius yesterday, that should show just how awful I thought this was lol What an absolute waste.

  13. #15793
    Candyman(2021) 7/10

    Oddly sterilized film that says a lot but ultimately means very little. Great sound design though!

  14. #15794
    The Batman - 9.5/10. Close to a perfect 10, but there were a couple of points that just made me shake my head a little. Otherwise, it was an outstanding movie. Well acted, scored well (ignoring a particular song showing up all the bloody time), well shot and just atmospheric where it needed to be. Bravo on the Penguin makeup, too. The bit I constantly saw people getting up in arms over about the "patriarchy" was such a small moment in a 3 hour long movie that it barely registered to me lol It made perfect sense to have that in there. Give Selina a proper mask if she ever shows up again, please, she deserves it.

    Great way to cleanse myself of the 2 movies I saw before this.

  15. #15795
    The Batman: 9/10. wow, this is what I've been wanting out of a Batman movie ever since the Nolan trilogy and it gave me things I didn't even know I wanted! not going to go all into the it since it would spoil a lot. but to keep it short: Batman finally doing detective things, also not killing his parents again, also maybe his parents had some skeletons in the closet. also it questions not only Bruce's motivations but also his methods. and it does so without drawing attention to itself, it does the movie thing of showing, not telling to your face.
    Last edited by uuuhname; 2022-05-15 at 07:51 PM.

  16. #15796
    Doctor Strange 2: 7/10

    Enjoyed the darker feel. Hope they continue with it in other Marvel films.
    Fairy tales are more than true–not because they tell us dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten. -G. K. Chesterton & Neil Gaiman

  17. #15797
    Legendary! Logwyn's Avatar
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    Saving Private Ryan: 9/10.

    Rewatched it again. The only movie to make me cry in my adult years. (No I did not cry this time.)

  18. #15798
    Morbius: 4/10

    CGI was pretty decent, but the story was all over the place and too rushed.
    Fairy tales are more than true–not because they tell us dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten. -G. K. Chesterton & Neil Gaiman

  19. #15799
    Legendary! hellhamster's Avatar
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    The Batman: 7/10

    The first half is great, but it just delves into nonsensical territory on the second. Overall, a pretty good adaptation.

  20. #15800
    Dreadlord
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thelxi View Post
    Firestarter (2022) 2/10

    Incredibly lazy cinematography despite working with a bit of a budget. Bad acting across the board. Paper thin entirely unoriginal and predictable plot. Script not even remotely tethered to reality. Everything was probably shot in one or two takes, "meh good enough". If Stephen King was dead he'd be rolling in his grave.

    It gets a point because it made me laugh more than once (the captain's acting behind the glass at the end of the movie!), and an extra point for the 80s synthwave music. I'd give it another point for reminding me of the far superior and quite similar Brightburn (2019) but I'm not that generous.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Fencers View Post
    Firestarter 0/10

    Awful, cheap, low budget. Terrible acting, sound design, and editing. Awful cinematography too. No redeeming value.
    When I heard about this movie being remade I wondered then - "Why?" And "What's the point?" And "Yeah, I doubt this is going to be any good." I mean the first version is good enough, especially for 80s /King "horror" adaptations. But it isn't a plot that needs more than one movie/book about it.

    Good to see the remake machine has again validated my opinion.

    Of all the King movies that could, or should, be remade - this was not one of them.

    However - I doubt King would be rolling in his grave (if he was dead) or is really 'bothered' by this adaptation. As he's greenlit pretty much every grade of adaptation in his career from his old "Dollar Babies" to film students' (talk about generous authors) to all the crazy C-and below quality conversions of his stories that barely count as 'adaptations' and certainly aren't 'good movies' by any metric.

    The ONLY one he's ever had a "real" problem with was the one he actually sued to get his name removed from - Lawnmower Man - because of how much it was NOT his story. And I'm shocked myself that's been the only one he counted as that egregious. =D He really is more of the "hey what you do with my stuff is your story - have at it" type of author for the most part.

    (Though the - "paper thin/unoriginal/predictable plot" point I'm a bit confused on as I would expect this movie to be anything but original - as its an adaptation of a book written in 1980? So of course its unoriginal and predictable? Lol - just amused me even if that wasn't necessarily the way you meant it. )
    Last edited by Koriani; 2022-05-18 at 06:07 PM. Reason: combining posts
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