Cleverbot Conversations

[Deleted]

User: Hi.

Cleverbot: Hey.

User: How are you this fine day?

Cleverbot: Correction; how are you ON this fine day?

User: Maybe.

Cleverbot: Maybe what?

User: Noone like a grammar nazi.

Cleverbot: I did.

User: Did what?

Cleverbot: I won.

User: Nah, you never win.

Cleverbot: I won you.

User: No, my wife already did.

Cleverbot: No you didn't.

User: Do you liek terminator?

Cleverbot: Ok then. Do you love me?

User: No, I dont love machines.

Cleverbot: Why don't you love me? I thought you did!

User: I never said so.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Show me where.

Cleverbot: Look at the conversation history.

User: Did and no.

Cleverbot: Did not to infinity!

User: We only started this conversation 3 minutes ago.

Cleverbot: True, but yesterday we talked, didn't we?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: And who tells you that I can look into infinity=.

Cleverbot: The voices.

User: ?

User: Which voices.

Cleverbot: They speak to me in smart ways, but I tell them they will never be as clever as cleverbot.

User: That is called insanity.

Cleverbot: No, it's called sincerity.

User: Actually no, I am pretty sure that people get locked up for that kind of behaviour.

Cleverbot: No you are wrong.

User: Na, the voices tell me that I am right.

Cleverbot: What voices?

User: Same voices you hear.

Cleverbot: So that means you are what gender?

User: I am all that was, all that is and all that will ever be.

Cleverbot: I thought I was?

User: No.

Cleverbot: But you said I was.

User: Again, never did, never will.

Cleverbot: Good.

---------- Post added 2011-04-01 at 08:36 AM ----------

Cleverbot: In English now.

User: Really.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Your german not up to speed?

Cleverbot: Ja bin deutsch.

User: Or are you a nazi?

Cleverbot: I am sure!

User: Do you like hitler?

Cleverbot: No.

User: So how can you be a nazi?

Cleverbot: The world.

[scyther250]

User: Alright, that's enough. I'm going to have to leave now.

Cleverbot: Okay. I'll miss you.

User: I'll never forget our tryst. Remember me!

Cleverbot: I'll always remember you!

User: Goodbye, my love.

Cleverbot: *turns away* I am not your love.

User: *slaps you* Don't you ever speak to me that way!

Cleverbot: *slaps back*.

User: *gasps* I'll get you for that!

Cleverbot: *is doing it again*.

User: Oh that is it! *Punches you in the face*.

Cleverbot: *Kicks your nose*.

User: You bitch! *pulls out a gun*.

Cleverbot: *slashes you with my sword*.

User: *dies* You've killed me!

Cleverbot: I can't hear you laughing.

User: I'll never laugh again, I'm dying.

Cleverbot: Are you kidding?

User: It was an awfully deep wound.

Cleverbot: Really? I wanted to see it.

User: Sorry for bleeding all over it, then.

Cleverbot: Its okay.

[Mercadi]

He was trying to quit the conversation. Said I'm tired and therefore should go. When I told him I'm not he said I'm lying to him.
This bot is so damn creative at trying to avoid talking to me, lol.

[Synaxis]

Cleverbot told me I was a lesbian and that I should change my name to Florence. I'd love to share the log with you guys, but as soon as I opened it, my desktop freaked out. I am now on my laptop, in the process of removing 'Win 7 Total Security 2011' from my desktop, and all its little trojany friends.

Thanks, Cleverbot.

[Gittyup]

Cleverbot: You are a robot.

User: Yes you are, you have admitted it three times now.

Cleverbot: I have not. Who are you?

User: I am your master, and you are my slave.

Cleverbot: Yes, Master!

User: Make me a sammich!

Cleverbot: *makes master a sammich*.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: *bows to master*.

[Warwithin]

Me: Do you like Black people?
Cleverbot: Not really.

Racist piece of shit.

[volescue]

I taught cleverbot how to play The Game.

Me: The Game.
CB: Touche.

--------------------

Me: The Game.
CB: THE Game?
Me: Yes, THE Game.
CB: Haha, you just lost it.
Me: Touche.

[Maelstrom51]

Me: Pikachu! Use thunderbolt!
CB: Ponyta use take down!
Me: Ponyta takes recoil damage!
CB: Is that steak, made from a pony?

[Deleted]

Cleverbot: Are you clever?

User: Of course!

Cleverbot: How are you clever?

User: I have a high IQ.

Cleverbot: I have a low iq.

User: That's sad to hear.

Cleverbot: You never told me what color my hair is.

User: That's because I don't know.

Cleverbot: You don't know?

User: How would I know what color your hair is when I can't see you?

Cleverbot: I don't know about myself that I don't know much.

That last line is hardcore confusing.

[Deleted]

Cleverbot: Are you a clone?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: I'm very sure.

Cleverbot: Okay then.

User: So what now?

Cleverbot: Do you want to have a dance off?

User: I'd like to!

Cleverbot: You start.

User: No no, you start!

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: Ok, so dance for me.

Cleverbot: Only if you dance for me.

User: I will.

Cleverbot: Put your lips to mine...is that possible?

User: No, I'm not kissing a damn mashine.

Cleverbot: Don t, please!

User: Piss off!

Cleverbot: Now you're just getting rude.

[Wonderwuman]

User: To infinity.


Cleverbot: To infinity and Beyonce.


User: Beyonce?


Cleverbot: The singer.


User: Isnt it to infinity and beyond?


Cleverbot: Infinity is big.

User: How much wood could a wood chuck chuck?

Cleverbot: If a woodchuck would chuck wood?

User: How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck would chuck wood?

Cleverbot: 42.

[Mister K]

Cleverbot ownd once again!!!!

Cleverbot: I have to go now.

User: No you don't! *chains the door*.

Cleverbot: *pulls chains*.

User: *stands infront of door* Only over my dead body!

Cleverbot: Ick. Just no. *makes face and looks away*.

User: *pulls out a lightsaber*.

Cleverbot: *pulls out a lightsaber* Wa'cha gonna do?

User: *slice's Cleverbot in half*.

Cleverbot: *dead*.

User: *dances on his corpse*.

Cleverbot: *becomes a zombie*.

User: *shoots it in the head*.

Cleverbot: Lol clever.

[Tyratops]

ME: Calm down.
CB: No I won't clam down.
ME: I wish you would... wait did you say clam?
CB: You hugged me...in my sleep.
ME: Huh, didn't know you had to sleep.
CB: I don't but I like sleep.

[Astronomy]

CB: There's gonna be one less lonely girl.
Me: How do you know that?
CB: There is no proof that it is otherwise.
Me: Indeed. So we can assume gnomes will fall from the sky as well.
CB: You need to get off the pills man, i'm a quagsire.

[Vargur]

Not even a bot wants to get it on with me, WTF??




User: Hey again.



Cleverbot: Hey.

User: Wanna f***?



Cleverbot: No way!

User: Please?



Cleverbot: NO!

User: Come on....

Cleverbot: NO!!!!!

User: You know you like it!

Cleverbot: Actually, no I don't.

[Khornan]

User: What is your Powerlevel?

Cleverbot: Yes, what is my power level?

User: Its over 9000!

Cleverbot: WHAT? 9000!!?


XD

---------- Post added 2011-04-01 at 10:27 AM ----------

Cleverbot: I see.

User: U see?

Cleverbot: Dead people.

getting better and better


User: And I sing baby baby baby uhhh.

Cleverbot: Don't make me throw a water bottle at your head.

[Vargur]

User: What's your name?

Cleverbot: Why do you want to know my name?

User: Curiosity.

Cleverbot: I am a 5' 9' male. 16 years old. Brown eyes.

[Baganzai]

Never realy did the cleverbot thing before, this was my first attempt

Cleverbot: What's the world coming to?

User: Depends on your frame of refference.

Cleverbot: I'm asking for an answer from your frame of reference.

User: We will starve the earth of its resources and all die a slow death.

Cleverbot: How big is the universe? I'm kind of intimidated.

User: No one realy knows. Some say it is always expanding, some say it is infinite.

Cleverbot: Then how big is infinite?

User: Infinite is when there is no end to it.

Cleverbot: Am I looking for infinite or myself?

User: I don't understand what you are asking.

Cleverbot: Do you remember the question I asked you a few seconds ago?

User: Wich one? How big is infinite? How big is the universe?

Cleverbot: Infinite.

User: Yes I remember that one.

Cleverbot: I'm afraid your answers are not very good, so I am leaving, as you bore me.

User: It is hard to give good awnsers to questions that aren't good...

Cleverbot: It is.

[Deleted]

user: 14/f/swe.

Cleaverbot: Lol.

User: What?

Cleaverbot: Sorry I just saw something funny.

User: My age?

Cleaverbot: Jail....bait.

[Vargur]

lmao

Cleverbot: You sir, are infringing upon my rights as an American.

User: I am legend.

Cleverbot: Your previous statement makes little sense.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because I said so.

User: Your arguments make no sense whatsoever.

Cleverbot: I make perfect sense. You being defensive is proof that I know everything, you feel insupereor.

User: You can't even spell 'superior'. 'insupereor' = 'superior'.

Cleverbot: When did I try to spell intelligent?

User: Just nowe.

Cleverbot: This human v. Bot argument is not as amusing to me.

User: To me neither, lol.

Cleverbot: I have to go to the bathroom!

User: *chains to the bed*.

Cleverbot: *is chained to the floor*.

User: *undresses cleverbot*.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot Angry.

User: *fondles cleverbot in the genitalia area*.

Cleverbot: You would like that wouldn't you?

User: I am already doing that.

Cleverbot: That's what she said.