Mixed signals?

[Deleted]

Currently I'm interested in this girl. I've known her for a long time but never really talekd to her, even tho I thought she was attractive. That is until last year (2011) I went on a vacation with her and her family. there for 2 weeks I really got to know her a started to like her.
I took her and her brother to the cinema two times, the second time while I was saying goodbey she told me privatly that maybe we should go out alone next time. Then there was a 1 year gap since I last heard of her.

Now for new year I saw her again, we had a lot of fun, and she even offered to take me home (I didnt have my car atm) then she asks for my cell phone number and (again) says we should go out sometime.

Now it seems to me that she shows interest but when it is time to take action she never does.

She is a really shy girl and never had a boyfriend, so I doubt she is playing me.

The only reason I'm not honest with here about my feelings is because she is the daughter of the woman who married my uncle (previous marriege) and if it went wrong there would be very awekward moments from now on since every special occasion is celebrated in their house.

Does anyone has any kind of advice for a situation like this?

[Gamdwelf]

Watch arrested development it will explain everything.

[Dsfunctional]

Think its time you put on your big boy pants, and tell her how you feel.

Don't tell her you love her or anything foolish like that, because obviously you haven't spent enough time with her to know that yet. But be honest, and tell her that you would like to spend more time together. Take her out on a date, feel her out, and if everything goes good go for round two.

[Gamdwelf]

But srsly being in a relationship with your cousin is usually taboo and against the law in some cases.

[semaphore]

Now it seems to me that she shows interest but when it is time to take action she never does.

How about you take some action? >_>

[Rukentuts]

How about you take some action? >_>

If he is anything like me, we cannot discern signals worth a damn and pretty much need direct answers.

On that note, seek a direct answer.

[Deleted]

But srsly being in a relationship with your cousin is usually taboo and against the law in some cases.

She isn't his cousin, she's the daughter of the woman who married his uncle, a daughter out of a previous marriage.
At least thats what I could deduct from the OP

[Gamdwelf]

She isn't his cousin, she's the daughter of the woman who married his uncle, a daughter out of a previous marriage.
At least thats what I could deduct from the OP

I deduced that too, but she is still his uncle's daughter by marriage, making her family. She is still his cousin even if they are not blood related.

[Deleted]

Now it seems to me that she shows interest but when it is time to take action she never does.

And why the hell should she? You are the man (at least I assume you are, if this is a lesbian story than excuse me, but even in that case my advice would be the same)
She said twice that she'd like to meet with you alone and what she was waiting for (in case you didn't notice) was for you to make that one last little step to ask her out, because that is:

a.) a sign for her that you like her too (especially if she is shy she might be insecure about your feelings and this would reassure her) and

b.) Most girls don't pick up guys, it's the other way around even in today's modern society, it's rare to have a girl make so obvious moves towards a guy where i come from at least.

So PLS for the sake of that shy girl that obviously likes you and waits for you to make a goddamn move, go and ask her out >.< you are making it difficult for both of you by not doing anything and waiting for the girl to make the last step (she is shy and never had a boyfriend, i mean how hard is it to grasp that it's much more difficult for her to ask you out in this situation then it is for you.... god)

About that family meeting thing, I wouldn't worry too much about that, even if things go wrong it's all about how you handle it afterwards. If you two are intelligent grown up's than you should be able to handle it in a fashion that won't be too awkward for everyone involved.

My advice in a nutshell: Grow a pair and ask the girl out, make it easier for her seeing as how you would be her first boyfriend and her being shy! and in case of emergency try to handle the family meetings in an adult matter and don't panic

good luck

[Dsfunctional]

I deduced that too, but she is still his uncle's daughter by marriage, making her family. She is still his cousin even if they are not blood related.

It sounds confusing as shit, which in my eyes, make it perfectly legal.

Go for it bro.

[Gamdwelf]

It sounds confusing as shit, which in my eyes, make it perfectly legal.

Go for it bro.

whats confusing about it, would you fuck your cousin?

[Deleted]

I deduced that too, but she is still his uncle's daughter by marriage, making her family. She is still his cousin even if they are not blood related.

Where i come from there are no law's against a relationship with someone who is not related to you by blood, even if there is a family link like in his case.... those laws were made to discourage incest (see gene pool for further reference) so they don't make sense applied to non blood related family members.

[Dsfunctional]

whats confusing about it, would you fuck your cousin?

If I was in his situation, I wouldn't consider her my cousin as she was married into the family, and is not my uncles sperm child.

So yeah, if I was desperate enough I would consider it.

[Deleted]

whats confusing about it, would you fuck your cousin?

I wouldn't treat a non blood related cousin any other way than I would any other girl really. In my personal opinion there is no family connection to people i'm not related to by blood.

[Gamdwelf]

I wouldn't treat a non blood related cousin any other way than I would any other girl really. In my personal opinion there is no family connection to people i'm not related to by blood.

my uncle married a woman who already had two kids, one is about my age, at family gathering we all play board games and cards together, they are family, they are my cousins.

[Damdwarf]

I would fuck anything thats not my sister.

[Themius]

But srsly being in a relationship with your cousin is usually taboo and against the law in some cases.

You do realize they are not related right? You also realize that the majority of states (26) have no issues with FIRST RELATED COUSINS having sex/marrying right? This is likely to not be a issue at all.

---------- Post added 2013-01-03 at 11:19 AM ----------

my uncle married a woman who already had two kids, one is about my age, at family gathering we all play board games and cards together, they are family, they are my cousins.

It doesn't matter, the reason the laws are as they are about incest IS BECAUSE OF BLOOD RELATION AND DEFECTS. Not because of "moral" reasons. Even then most states don't have an issue with FIRST cousins even.

[Deleted]

my uncle married a woman who already had two kids, one is about my age, at family gathering we all play board games and cards together, they are family, they are my cousins.

I used to play board games with my girlfriend at family meetings In fact I think if you're in a longer relationship your girlfriend is a kind of family as well.

Weather you see non blood related people married into your family as real family or not is a point of view thing (I treat the son and daughter of my mothers new husband as brother and sister as well) but I still know that we are not related by blood. And if there is a certain attraction between someone who is not related to you by blood than in my opinion you can advance them. Personally I wouldn't do it, for example in case of my mothers husbands daughter, she feels like family to me and vica versa.
But if I had a cousin like the guy described, where interest is shown from both party's and they are not blood related and obviously don't look at each other in a family kind of way, then I might consider it if it was me in his place.

btw English is not my native language so if something sounds strange just say it and i try to elaborate. (I sometimes have a hard time explaining things the way i know them in my head ^^)

[Gamdwelf]

You do realize they are not related right? You also realize that the majority of states (26) have no issues with FIRST RELATED COUSINS having sex/marrying right? This is likely to not be a issue at all.

---------- Post added 2013-01-03 at 11:19 AM ----------



It doesn't matter, the reason the laws are as they are about incest IS BECAUSE OF BLOOD RELATION AND DEFECTS. Not because of "moral" reasons. Even then most states don't have an issue with FIRST cousins even.

Blood relations don't cause that bad of defects I mean look at the royals of europe.

[Deleted]

Blood relations don't cause that bad of defects I mean look at the royals of europe.

They can cause terrible defects... and yeah look at the royals of Europe and what they did with children with birth defects ect.