What is the strangest injury you have ever had?

[Daedius]

Getting impaled by branches through my lower abdomen because I was an idiot on my jet ski, looking behind at my sister being pulled whom I thought was telling me to go faster (she wasn't) to which I did, right into the bank.

Fun!

[lockedout]

Had a spider bite on the shaft of my dick. Went to the doctor cause I thought the bump might have been something else, but he noticed a couple fang marks and just gave me an anti-inflammatory to bring the swelling down.

Had a spider bite right next to my nipple. Looked like I had two nipples on one side.

[Deleted]

Was making out with some chick, and she squeezed on my nipples so hard they bled through my shirt.

I want to know how the conversation after that went.

[Goondicker]

Haven't had too many injuries, but there is one thing...

About 2-3 times a year I will slip a rib out of place. And dear lord does it suck.

[Queen of Hamsters]

I did a lot of horseback riding in my 20's, and at one point I made the terrible decision of riding a damned Arabian Thoroughbred. The horse made crack users come off as tranquil.

Anyway, we were riding along a nice trail, nothing out of the ordinary, no roads, it's a private area so I was relaxed in the saddle talking to the others. Suddenly, my horse gave off a huge neigh and jumped straight upwards. As in, STRAIGHT up. I flew a good height and came crashing down on the back end of the saddle. It was a VERY hard landing, and anyone proclaiming that women don't hurt from punches to the crotch, is ignorant.

Long story short, I bruised pretty badly. I went to see a doctor and had to bring 2 of the others as witnesses to emphasize that I had not been the victim of sexual assault.

What had scared the glorified hamburger? A small twig on the ground. None of the other horses had reacted in any shape or form.

[Desparil]

Got bitten by a chimpanzee in small zoo behind circus when i was like 8-9 years old.

[Puupi]

It was a VERY hard landing, and anyone proclaiming that women don't hurt from punches to the crotch, is ignorant.

I have a female friend who had an accident when driving a men's bicycle.

She needed stitches. A lot of stitches.

[Donald Hellscream]

I split my eyebrow when I was little by running head first into a pingpong table.

Also at one point about probably 18-19 years ago I stepped on a piece of broken glass which imbedded itself in my foot at an angle which allowed the wound to close over the piece and then about 3-4 years later it somehow just fell out one day.

Those are probably the strangest, although splitting your eyebrow is probably a fair common injury when you dive head first into a steel frame. But the glass one is definitely pretty strange.

[belfpala]

One time I sneezed so hard I broke a rib.

Third time I've broken a rib, but that's the strangest of the three.

[Donald Hellscream]

I have a female friend who had an accident when driving a men's bicycle.

She needed stitches. A lot of stitches.

I never understood the design of men's bicycles, if I am sterile it is probably as a result of all the times I've leapt off my bicycle and went balls first into that inconveniently placed part of the frame.

[Byleth]

When I was a server many years ago, I was carrying a heavy stack of plates, and somehow a crusty bread roll got wedged between my wrist and the plates. The roll sliced open my wrist...

[Puupi]

I never understood the design of men's bicycles, if I am sterile it is probably as a result of all the times I've leapt off my bicycle and went balls first into that inconveniently placed part of the frame.

Yup, women's frames are a lot better. Easier to leap on to/off as well due to the better frame.

- - - Updated - - -

When I was a server many years ago, I was carrying a heavy stack of plates, and somehow a crusty bread roll got wedged between my wrist and the plates. The roll sliced open my wrist...

I had a work buddy when I worked in a super market who had a fillet knife in his hand while he was lifting some stuff (idiot, right). He somehow managed to stick the fillet knife through his left thigh.

[Bathory]

Slid down a slide when I was a kid, but someone had put a wooden pike at the bottom of it. The point caught me on the right side, right in between my thigh and groin. Bout an inch to the left and I may have been a girl.

[Ayirasi]

I want to know how the conversation after that went.

I didn't notice it until later. By that point, the blood was dry and had stuck the shirt stuck to my nipples. *ri-i-i-ip*

[Donald Hellscream]

When I was a server many years ago, I was carrying a heavy stack of plates, and somehow a crusty bread roll got wedged between my wrist and the plates. The roll sliced open my wrist...

Getting eviscerated by a piece of bread.. Atleast thats one interesting injury.

[Deleted]

I didn't notice it until later. By that point, the blood was dry and had stuck the shirt stuck to my nipples. *ri-i-i-ip*

Ouch.

/10ouch

[MisterBigglez]

I had part of my lip torn off at a water park after standing up to a bully. He was wearing rings in the pool and when he punched me, he sliced and ripped off part of my lip. I remember all the kids screaming as blood just poured out of my mouth and turning the lazy river into the red river lol. Had to get a lot of stitches and now it is constantly swolen inside.

[Diablo3derp]

. Severe respiratory distress syndrome
Recurrent pneumothoraces
Pulmonary interstitial emphysema (bilaterally)
Grade III intraventricular hemorrhage
Posthermorrhagic hydrocephalus
Cystic periventricular leukomalacia
Retinopathy of prematurity
Umbilical hernia.

When I was released from the hospital at 6 months of age I had survived more than most people.

[Puupi]

. Severe respiratory distress syndrome
Recurrent pneumothoraces
Pulmonary interstitial emphysema (bilaterally)
Grade III intraventricular hemorrhage
Posthermorrhagic hydrocephalus
Cystic periventricular leukomalacia
Retinopathy of prematurity
Umbilical hernia.

When I was released from the hospital at 6 months of age I had survived more than most people.

I was born with both of my collarbones broken (big boi, small mom).

Your list is crazy though!

[Najnaj]

Near death by toilet paper holder...

Backdraft in the toilet while I was sitting on it. I got startled and almost severed my arm on the jagged edge of the toilet paper holder... It was a lot sharper than it needed to be.