the most stupid ways to injure yourself

[Zemm]

Not really injury, most like hurting myself.
I was in Rio about a month ago having blast in Rock in Rio. It was the last days of the shows and because axl rose was late or something guns n roses came on very late.
The show ended at about 5 AM. Being unfamiliar to Rio and hadn't a clue where the buses were, i climbed like a taxi for many people. So in the taxi i had no room to sit, so i sat on the edge of some seat with me facing the sliding door at the side of the van. I was so tired i fell asleep and slammed my head again a handle bar, instantly waking me up. I felt so dumb it happened to me in a van filled with people, i of course had to fall asleep again and slam my head once more...and once more.
Never have i been so tired where i couldn't even stop myself from falling asleep to keep my poor forehead alive.

[Deleted]

Drugs

/thread

we have a winner.

[Voodookiller]

Punshing that wall...

[Srg56]

the most stupid ways to injure yourself

Smoking/drinking too much ranks quite up there.

[Honkeymagoo]

I was eating something while sitting on the floor and watching tv. I decided to get up mid bite, but when I brought my legs up to push off the ground I kneed my fork into the roof of my mouth. I actually had to use force to pull it out and it made a light popping noise when it released. Surprisingly it didn't really hurt all that much, though it did bleed a bit.

[3DTyrant]

i fell over.... on nothing but air.... and my dad just sighed, without knowing if i was ok or not, pretttyyyy stupid, yes

[jegerlee]

Last year, Christmas party at my work.
They always plan party games such as; every department had to form a choir and sing an optional song and last year we had pirate theme, yes, pirate theme @ Christmas party.

We had to do all kinds of games and it was actually quite fun. The last event was Tug of War and my team was strictly guys and we were up against a girl-only squad. We taunted each other and one of the girls was abit frisky and jumped on my back and I lost my balance just for a few seconds meanwhile getting my hand entangled in the rope.
Almost immediately after, the girls pulled the robe and my pinky and ring finger snapped - ouch!

2½ hours later I was back from the hospital with a cast and continued drinking, being the center of the party

[Grath]

i got woken up rolling over and smashing my nose against brick wall breaking it..... blood everywhere!!!!

[Deleted]

Once I drived, my old car, i was going to buy that i have in my signature, and i though, HEY WHY NOT try to take the shock absorber from my spring, then it would just like a hell. So i toke a long road and i drived really fast, and i clumsy brakes, it jumped so crazy, but i forgot i should but something extra to the car, there could hold the wheels, so after some high high jumps it just sad: BOOM, and i almost shitted my pants because it just hitted the ground lol

[Darkdruidelf]

I'm a fencer, and I've done a lot of stupid shit. This wasn't really injuring myself, but in fencing you only have one hand gloved. Because of the way you stand, you really only need one to be gloved, if your offhand gets hit you did something stupid. Anyways, I was fencing at a tournament, and the ref had called halt at the end of the first 3 minute period (Bout to 15, 3 3minute periods to anyone who gets fencing). I went to remove my mask with my offhand, but apparently the guy I was fencing didn't realize it, and he hit me square in the ungloved hand with a full on lunge.I was surprised it didn't break it, it hurt. So much. I guess it was me hurting myself, because I stopped fencing before the other guy did.

Hope he, at least, got a red card for that. If intentional maybe even a black.

But yay, another fencer on these forums! (Epee is the one true weapon).

OT: I thought of another one. My mum is dyspraxic, so she is always burning herself on literally everything she comes into contact with. Also, I remember when I was younger, if either me or my brother were feeling ill she would always end up doing something like tripping up or burning us, totally accidentally, that would just make it all worse.

Also, speaking of fencing, I once managed to hit one of my friends so hard in the nuts he nearly did a flip. His fault for parrying downwards when I was too far to stop my attack. That was really, really funny.

[Deleted]

Drugs

/thread

Depends on how you use it, not all drugs are bad.

[Syantaa]

Cigarettes. They pretty much guarantee a painful death via lung cancer.

[Shakadam]

I was sitting on watch deep in the forest, alone, once back when I did my military service. I was really bored and started playing with my knife, trying to chop some pieces of wood into smaller pieces.

Yeah you know how this is going to end....

Chopped myself in my left thumb which resulted in a fairly decent river of blood, first and only time I found some use for the first aid things we got, lol.
The knife carved out a good bit of a tendon/muscle on the "up" side of the thumb, I was completely unable to move my thumb upwards for several weeks, and even though it's been about 4 years since that accident it's still noticable.

[Ave07]

Foot hitting the door hurts a lot.

[Farolok]

I once broke my foot kicking a guy in the balls.

Also, this wasn't my injury, but funny/twisted.

My cousin and I used to play pretend wrestling when we were kids. We used to throw soft kicks to the legs to each other or whatever, but it bugged me he always tried to block with his hand open, it freaked me out I might break his hand. Anyway we were pissing around and I go for one of my trademark roundhouse kicks to the thigh and he tries to block. He puts his hand out to block and I catch him square on the tip of the thumb. It immediately looks broken, but I didn't want to panic him, so I calmed him down and we resume. Another roundhouse, same result, massively disfigured thumb. He starts screaming and by this point I felt sick looking at it. Eventually phoned his mum and he gets rushed to hospital. Next day he gets and operation, double break of the thumb resulting in a pin being placed in his arm from the tip of the thumb to his wrist.

He stopped blocking with an open hand after that.

[-Zait-]

My first attempt at a Molotov cocktail....I'll let you use your imagination x_X

[Níghtmare]

Decided while in menorca(some spanish island.. or canari island or some shit.) that the quickest way from the top of the 30ft cliff edge to the sandy bottom was to jump. Totally kowabungaa'd off the edge clearing spikey rocks on the way down, i'm thinking. "SUCCESS COMRADE!" ..then i land on the bottom with an almighty thudd, snapped my heel off completely. Turns out, it was a fucking man made beach and was concrete with a TINY layer of sand -_-.The joys of being young & stupid.

The topless woman sunbathing who I landed next to was even more surprised tbf.

---------- Post added 2011-11-18 at 08:34 AM ----------

Ooh, ooh! I have another one. I used to work as a labourer for some rich guy who was renevating an old farm house, and we had this gardener who'd come down every wednesday who was a right laugh, he was properly mental. This particular day it was pissing down so we were both sent to knock down lath & plaster in the ceilings.. We were taking our time, and then he got bored.. took a shovel, and smacked the entire row.. it all cracked, he looked up for a moment.. and giggled. I heard creeking and backed off slowly, next thing.. the whole ceiling collapses like a trap door, and bricks and shit fall through from the loft (no idea what they were doing there).. but one smacked him square in the middle of his bald head and dented it.
It's a good job he wasn't seriously hurt cos I was crying with laughter & choking on the dust cloud