Warchief Garrosh Encounter, Patch 5.2

[Courierrawr]

Warchief Garrosh Raid Encounter, Patch 5.2, December 12 2013 – September 17 2015.

Warchief Garrosh Hellscream is the only boss but has an attunement requirement of the Pandaren Ambassador, as well as Exalted with Nat Pagle, Operation Shieldwall, the Brawler’s guild and completing the criteria of Insane in the Membrane. You are not forced.
There is no trash, except for a short even where you must fight Twilight dragons by taunting them, and kill Nerubians and Vykrul once the drakes are dead. On the way to the throne room is C’thun trash, however. All trash respawns after each attempt.
Garrosh enters. He yells, “Very well, I suppose it must be this way. If only you’d seen what I’ve seen, THEN you’d understand. There is no good. No light. There is only PAAH. I am the world’s TRUE Warchief, and as long as I reign over these pitiful, mortal insects, this will be the hour of their demise.

Garrosh holds up a vial.
GARROSH. STAHP. VAT IS IN THAT VIAL? WAT R U DOING.
What my Father could not.
He drinks demon blood, making him extremely large and red, and actually becomes encased in Elementium armour. His new armour makes his voice deeper, and he yells out things like “Break yourselves upon my body. FEEEL the strrrength of the eaarrth.
We fight him on four platforms, each time we kill parts of his armour, and deal with the blood. After defeating his four shoulder pads, he falls down, and begins spewing demon blood everywhere. The bloods slowly make their way towards Garrosh and heal him. There is also Attenuation, Shadow Traps, Defile and Dreadflame, because Blizzard hates you.
Once Garrosh's blood is dead, it turns out it was actually Mannoroth controlling him, so he is not responsible for his actions. Players now begin fighting Mannoroth.

An orc yells out GO'EL!
Thrall comes running through the gates of Orgrimmar, but is very slow, as he is roleplay walking, and doesn’t have ghost wolf, a mount, and frequently stops to point out obvious things to people in the trade district, often telling them to enchant and gem their gear. He manages to aggro Alliance guards, and spends several minutes auto attacking them. Thrall manages to arrive, and fights the pit lord, but is trapped in a block of ice. Players are meant to break him out of the ice, but there is already the 30% Power of the Aspects and Strength of Wrynn buff in effect, so this mechanic is ignored. Once he is freed, adds spawn, and he takes every single killing blow. When Mannoroth is at 10% health, he one shots the raid, and a 17 minute Roleplay event happens.

Garrosh then kills Mannoroth, and redeems himself, at 1% hp, while spamming emotes on Mannoroth's body. He equips his new Uncorrupted Ashbringer and is bathed in holy light and starts wearing paladin tier two.
Jaina Proudmoore resurrects the raid, tearfully hugging Garrosh, "I'm so proud of you Garrosh, my king."
Vol'jin then shoots Garrosh in the heart, and kills him.

The floor falls away, dropping the players into Ragefire Chasm, with water walking cast on every player in the raid, resulting in a requirement to stack shadow priests and mages. Nefarian and Onyxia fight the players, and upon their death, raise lava.
Three platforms are all that is not submerged by Ragefire Chasm's fiery lava, and the elemental lord of fire, Ragnaros bursts forth, proclaiming that the Firelands was TOO SOON, and this is the TRUE hour of his triumph.
Once he is dead, it seems that all is well, until-

I am the lucid dream. The monster in your nightmares. The Fiend of a Thousand Faces. BOW DOWN BEFORE THE WARCHIEF OF DEATH!
Garrosh Hellscream, risen from the dead by THE OLD GODS jumps down, stunning every player in the raid for 45 seconds, requiring every member to have a PvP trinket on. The following fight consists of tentacles, insanity, shadow crashes, and has an incredibly high nature resistance requirement. At 1% health, Garrosh sees the error of his ways, and makes a speech.
Yet all throughout my reign as Warchief, my own heart, devoid of emotion of empathy, I have felt.... NOTHING. A million, million lives wasted. Had they all held within them your tenacity, had they all loved life as you do? Lok'tar ogar.

Garrosh then slits his wrists out of shame and dies, dropping PvP gear, several pets ideal for battling, and a level 90 version of Stunherald, off DR, with a class requirement; it is only equippable by warriors, since they are not represented in arena enough.

Bolvar Fordragon appears, looks every player directly in the eye, and proclaims.
THERE MUST ALWAYS BE A WARCHIEF.
He dons the mighty Skull-Bone Shoulders of Garrosh, and sits on the throne. He is encased in a block of orcs, and his eyes turn glowing red. He tells the players to “pls go”.

Stormwind is turned into a giant memorial of lightforged steel as a remembrance of Garrosh's bravery, ushering in a new era, and making player versus player combat mandatory, or players' accounts are suspended.
There is no new content produced until every player beats Warchief Garrosh on LFR 10 man, which is the only mode available.
Ghostcrawler gets promoted.

This was not written by me, but by RuneHeal, an Alliance Death Knight on Reddit's WoW subreddit.

[Cernunnos]

Is this suppose to be funny or just a troll.

[Courierrawr]

Is this suppose to be funny or just a troll.

It's a joke.. lighten up.

[Cernunnos]

It's a joke.. lighten up.

I just didnt find it funny is all. The reused speeches from previous encounters. The butchering of the Yogg'Saron encounter (one of my favorite fights)

Normally I laugh at these sorts of things. The reversal of the dialog between Arthas and Uther in COS was entertaining.

[Airwaves]

What is this? I don't even... what?

[Blarglord69]

You forgot to add "you are not prepared" L2 boss meemes plz

[Arrashi]

That's really funny, but im afraid you forgot the part when Velen appears out of nowhere and claims that garrosh is naaru.

[furriusmurrius]

loved it 10/10 would raid again

[Ragetacular]

Ah yes, "Hellscream". We have dismissed that claim

[Vereesa]

Good read, would read again.

[jeanbono]

Phase 21 is too hard, plz nerf

[Kisho]

It's kind of a shame that people are finding re-used and frankly old jokes funny still.

All the writer of this has done is take every boss from WoW, throw all their quotes into a few paragraphs, and call it humour. Meh. Could've been so much better.

[Snuzzfizzle]

Oh, right, Reddit. No wonder it wasn't funny.





le

[Fenixhart]

...A bit Heavy handed.

[Xerra]

I liked the block of orcs that had a great image popping in my head.

[velde046]

Well I hope you had fun writing it ( or the guy that wrote it really). Personally I did not even twitch in any way resembling a smile. Not funny at all. According to Jim is a thousand times funnier....

[iscalio]

Personally I did not even twitch in any way resembling a smile. Not funny at all.

Not even "encased in a block of orcs", a tiny bit?

[Xothic]

I usually hate all the stupid WoW parody forum threads people make, but this is fucking hilarious.

[FuxieDK]

It's a joke.. lighten up.

No it's not, because jokes are funny..

[Deleted]

You forgot to add "you are not prepared" L2 boss meemes plz

You just made me dislike this.