Blaming only the Rapist is pointless

[Maxilian]

it is not about justifying rape, it is about preventing it.
thousand years of history tell us, that rape exists no matter how hard the punishment is.
Some people are just fucked up and do it.

That's true, but that doesn't mean that we should blame the victim, the best way to prevent rape is to educate the society, and by educate the society i don't mean, say that all men are rapist (as you may know, a woman can also be a rapist), is just educate both parties, let them understand what can and cannot be done, and ways to prevent it in the future.

[wowaccounttom]

of course victims are to blame to.

for the person with the intent to rape, there has to be a rapee.

this said rapee either:

• knowns the rapist and has aroused him/her by acting/talking flirtatious or wearing provocative outfits
• doesn't know the rapist and put himself/herself in a stupid situation (i.e: drunk at a party, accepted a beverage from a stranger, walked alone in a dangerous place)
• and a few others but i got bored of typing...

[Maxilian]

Why would it be locked? Genuinely curious.

These is one of the topics that always create a flame war

- - - Updated - - -

Don't wear skimpy clothing and you won't get raped?

Generally, rapists don't rape because "she had it coming with those clothes". It's about control and a slew of other mental problems that (again) generally don't have anything to do with how the woman is dressed or looks.

The idea that "she had it coming with those clothes" is so stupid, soon you will hear people saying "be ugly to prevent rape"

[Deleted]

Why would it be locked? Genuinely curious.

Ehh, the quote below.

These is one of the topics that always create a flame war

[Maxilian]

Some of you guys should watch the movie 'The Accused'.

Oh i have heard of that movie, is quite good (haven't seen it yet, and i doubt i will ever see it -i don't really like watching movies- ), By the way... who ice-skate uphill... can you even ice-skate uphill O.o ?

[Lora]

It's to early for some stupid bullshit like this. Either both parties give consent or you simply go on with your merry day. It is not the victims fault at all.

[Casagrande]

There are certainly cases where it's unclear after the fact whether it was consensual, or where it was unclear at the time. This has nothing to do with "what the girl was wearing or whatever".

[grimsanta]

Don't wear skimpy clothing and you won't get raped?

Generally, rapists don't rape because "she had it coming with those clothes". It's about control and a slew of other mental problems that (again) generally don't have anything to do with how the woman is dressed or looks.

Mental problems such as extreme bias and bigotry against women is probably one of them.

[Deleted]

All of this is also totally ignoring that the vast majority of rape isn't "people out in skimpy clothes" or any of that shit anyway, it's by people you are close to and trust, and if you cant look nice around people you trust, then... what? Why do these clothes even exist? How far is too far, if we're on about "rape victims should do more to prevent..."

If i made a thread about how I'm never going to be alone in a room with a man, even a friend or family member (because thats who commit most rapes) again because I don't want to be raped so I'm trying to reduce my odds by staying away from the biggest risk factors, people would lose their shit and I'd be called all kinds of names, told I was a feminazi and all sorts. It's so easy to tell people they should do this and that when it's comfortable for you to do so, but as soon as your friend from school doesn't want to see you any more because you are more likely to rape her than someone in a bar, people lose their shit.

[Kalis]

In any case where carelessness needs to loss or theft, the insurance company wont pay out and the police will tell you to be more careful so it doesn't happen again, but they will still arrest the person who stole it and hold them 100% responsible for the crime itself. You are still told you are careless and held responsible from the insurance company.

That entirely depends on the insurance policy you have, as not all insurers require the same levels of risk mitigation. Even where they impose stricter terms, it isn't in the policy because they think you are responsible if you get burgled, it's a financial decision from the insurers as they are financially liable for any loss and want to minimise their potential outlay.

I can't comment on what the police think as I'm not in the police, I am in insurance though.

[Moxal]

Doesn't matter what she is wearing or if she is drunk and coming onto you. Rape is in no way the victim's fault.

Exercise effing self control and don't judge someone's behavior while impaired (drunk/high) as conscent.

Seriously people, this isn't hard.

[dextersmith]

But we know that not all men are stable and reasonable, and should act accordingly. If you do things that are obviously unreasonably risky, you are putting yourself as risk. Putting yourself at unreasonable risk is stupid.

A drunk girl in a short skirt sleeping alone on a bus stop in a dangerous neighborhood is being stupid.

It's her fault for her friends leaving her, living in a bad neighborhood, and being tired? Women should never dress up to go out? Shame on them for not carrying condoms?

[Deleted]

Don't wear skimpy clothing and you won't get raped?

Generally, rapists don't rape because "she had it coming with those clothes". It's about control and a slew of other mental problems that (again) generally don't have anything to do with how the woman is dressed or looks.

i never stated that you are 100% "rape proof" if you do X Y and do not do A or B.

but taking precautions and beeing (lets give numbers just for the heck of it) 98% rape proof instead of 94% is better than nothing.
beeing unconciously drunk halfes your rape proofability in this numbers game.

[Maxilian]

There are certainly cases where it's unclear after the fact whether it was consensual, or where it was unclear at the time. This has nothing to do with "what the girl was wearing or whatever".

These, there's something that i find... disturbing, is the quantity of woman who uses "rape" on their advantage (i'm talking about the cases where there's no real rape, but the woman use it to damage their ex or something -a little childish but quite sad, when you have in mind that there are guys that spend time in jail because their ex wanted to be a bitch)

And then we have in the other hand, those girls that are actually raped and can't do anything about it (to the point where they even see whoever raped them all the time, because they couldn't say anything -in some cases, the victim is way too broken to say anything- )

[Bakis]

OP: GL living your life locked up at home, after all there is a risk of everything outside so if anything at all happens it is partly your fault.

[Maxilian]

i never stated that you are 100% "rape proof" if you do X Y and do not do A or B.

but taking precautions and beeing (lets give numbers just for the heck of it) 98% rape proof instead of 94% is better than nothing.
beeing unconciously drunk halfes your rape proofability in this numbers game.

We all understand that, but that doesn't make it her fault, again... is like saying that someone who was killed had it coming, because they were walking alone at night and they had no way to defend themselfs

[Revi]

It's her fault for her friends leaving her, living in a bad neighborhood, and being tired? Women should never dress up to go out? Shame on them for not carrying condoms?

You disagree that it's stupid to sleep drunk, in a short skirt, all alone, on a bus stop in a dangerous neighborhood at night?

[burlap]

I'm embarrassed for people that actually think like the OP.

[Maxilian]

What if your house collapses on you???? Could have prevented by not being there!

Well... you could have a house without a ceiling and it won't collapse on top of you

[Deleted]

Ehh, the quote below.

Nothing wrong with flame wars, is it? *eats popcorn*

On a serious note; rape will still happen - probably forever and no matter what.
So what can we (as an individual) do?

Protect ourselves.
Clothing does play a part in that protection, believe it or not.
If clothing plays a part in other scenarios, why doesn't it here?

I don't walk through a super-ghetto here where I live in the middle of the night dressed in formal clothing for obvious reasons.

I don't dress provocative (nazism, fascism, communism, anti-religious etc) in public because it brings risks, vocal or physical conflict.

I don't get shitfaced unless I plan to sleep at some buddy or something because it brings risks, getting mugged or attacked in the night on the way home.
Neither do I wear my most expensive clock, jewlery, work+private phone, etc because it's unnecessary and also increases the chances of getting mugged, especially if you're passed out on a bus.

Why is it so taboo to say that, MAYBE, going piss ass drunk wearing next to nothing, is a bad idea compared to being only slightly drunk but wearing full clothing?
It's not about victim blaming, it's about common fucking sense.

"But but... muh clock and jewlery", yeah I agree. I SHOULD be able to dress however I want. But in current society, I can't.