Pregnancy disagreements show the value of marriage

[Tennis]

https://www.thestar.com/life/2017/10...men-ellie.html

What do you call it when a woman stops taking birth control pills, without informing her partner?

It’s a common occurrence to trap a man into marriage or fatherhood, and a lifetime of support payments.


The phrases “birth control sabotage” and “reproductive coercion” have both been used to include what you’ve described.

In such cases, a woman may have stopped using birth control available to her, or poked holes in her partner’s condoms, in order to get pregnant without her partner’s consent.

According to a 2015 study published in the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology, which focuses more on women’s experiences, it nevertheless makes the point that males are affected, too:

“Most often, women are the victims of reproductive coercion, but men can be victimized as well.”

As a deceitful act of one person to another, it doesn’t seem that different on the surface, from a man removing a condom or damaging it intentionally . . . until a pregnancy occurs and there’s a question of legal wrongdoing.

There have been some civil lawsuits dealing with birth-control sabotage, though a number have been directed at a third party, i.e. a health provider having been negligent.

But for those men who had clearly expressed that they didn’t want a child, and had depended on a woman’s stated use of birth control, it’s personally felt as a financial assault.

Any direct similarity to sexual assault is more elusive.

Canadian courts, for example, have been reluctant to see it as sexual assault, like “stealthing.”

The reasons mostly revolve around the legal matter of whether consent was not only fraudulent, but also risked bodily harm.

Pregnancy and childbearing do bring risks to the body and health of a woman. By contrast, having an unwanted child doesn’t directly expose a man’s body to physical harm.

When it comes to a legal pursuit of damages for child support, which the man must then pay, Canadian courts have upheld the trend in family law away from fault-based claims.

The prevailing belief is that parents are equally responsible for maintaining a child.

Example: Last March, in the case of PP v. DD, an Ontario Court of Appeal judgment declared that, “no damages were recoverable for involuntary parenthood.”

As well, the man’s consent to sex despite the woman’s misrepresentation that she was using birth control did not warrant a “sexual battery claim.”

The California Court of Appeal, referred to a 1980 case, which considered granting financial damages to one parent over an unwanted child, would end much of that parent’s financial support obligation.

“It would seldom, if ever, result in a benefit to the child.”

In other words, lawsuits over support payments are counter to current North American family court emphasis on “the best interests of the child.”

However, as noted in Ontario’s PP v DD case this year, some jurisdictions such as Quebec, New Brunswick, and Australia have allowed for some form of recovery for the cost of raising a healthy child.

Here’s a major difference in how birth control sabotage affects men differently from women:

A man, who’s determined not to have a child with someone, can use a condom (safer than most other methods, though still not 100 per cent) even if she claims birth-control use.

Or, he can decide not to have sex with a woman he doesn’t trust implicitly.

Simply put, a man has the power to refuse sex, unless he’s sexually assaulted to the point of physical harm.

Came across an interesting article which shows the value of getting married and ensuring that both parties are serious about their relationship. It's the much better solution that what has been described here. Such a shame that we have on one side, individuals who lie and then get pregnant and then on the other side, individuals who don't want to be responsible for their own child.

[Sorshen]

https://www.thestar.com/life/2017/10...men-ellie.html




Came across an interesting article which shows the value of getting married and ensuring that both parties are serious about their relationship. It's the much better solution that what has been described here. Such a shame that we have on one side, individuals who lie and then get pregnant and then on the other side, individuals who don't want to be responsible for their own child.

Good joke.

[Deleted]

https://www.thestar.com/life/2017/10...men-ellie.html




Came across an interesting article which shows the value of getting married and ensuring that both parties are serious about their relationship. It's the much better solution that what has been described here. Such a shame that we have on one side, individuals who lie and then get pregnant and then on the other side, individuals who don't want to be responsible for their own child.

BLAH BLAH PEOPLE GET MARRIED BLAH BLAH

Marriage doesn't fix this and perhaps you should practice what you preach and gtfo online and get married yourself rather than wasting your life annoying people on here. Develop some self awareness, fix your many faults and be happy Tennisace

[Vapo]

Ok so children born outside of marriage should be considered "not-agreed" unless a written contract is made? Good.

[Katie N]

If they don't accept risk of pregnancy happening maybe they shouldn't have sex.

[Sky High]

all this article says to me is I need to get a vasectomy.

[Strawberry]

No birth control is 100% safe. There's always a chance that she will become pregnant. A baby can happen and then you're fucked and not just literaly.
Now, it should be a rule in marriage to be open and if she decides to become pregnant, then it should be a decision from both partners.

[Deleted]

If they don't accept risk of pregnancy happening maybe they shouldn't have sex.

You keep spouting this

If you don't want kids use condoms alongside birth control

[Xandrigity]

While I do agree marriage isnt for everyone I do see the spirit of what the author was trying to get at. Thing is people are so casual about sex now the old norms about sex, marriage and children don’t really fit anymore. Not necessarily a good thing. Couples in a relationship need to have more open and honest communication about birth control and what to do if an ”oopsie” happens.

[Total Crica]

You keep spouting this

If you don't want kids use condoms alongside birth control

There is nothing, sans removing fertile ovaries or fertile testicles, that will 100% prevent pregnancy.

All birth control does is help lower the risk of pregnancy occurring.

Anytime you have sex, willingly or not, as long as you are healthy and fertile, you are at risk of impregnating or becoming pregnant.

Marriage isn't going to change this fact.

All marriage does is ensure a public record of being willing to legally help out your partner if pregnancy occurs is on file.

[Halyon]

I'd call it being naive to only rely on your partner to avoid pregnancy. If you don't want kids, take your own precautions as well. That said, it's still dishonest...I'd call it some sort of entrapment tbh. Coercion is a bit more active, I think, so wouldn't really apply, and most certainly not assault, it's not aggravated or rape, so yeah... Entrapment would be my term for it.

[truckboattruck]

BLAH BLAH PEOPLE GET MARRIED BLAH BLAH

Marriage doesn't fix this and perhaps you should practice what you preach and gtfo online and get married yourself rather than wasting your life annoying people on here. Develop some self awareness, fix your many faults and be happy Tennisace

all evidence to the contrary....but such is the way of genetic proliferation

[Tico]

Not a nice thing to stop using pills without the consent of the partner.

[Deleted]

There is nothing, sans removing fertile ovaries or fertile testicles, that will 100% prevent pregnancy.

All birth control does is help lower the risk of pregnancy occurring.

Anytime you have sex, willingly or not, as long as you are healthy and fertile, you are at risk of impregnating or becoming pregnant.

Marriage isn't going to change this fact.

All marriage does is ensure a public record of being willing to legally help out your partner if pregnancy occurs is on file.

And? You risk your life everyday getting out of bed... Sane people don't worry about low % risks

[A dot Ham]

https://www.thestar.com/life/2017/10...men-ellie.html




Came across an interesting article which shows the value of getting married and ensuring that both parties are serious about their relationship. It's the much better solution that what has been described here. Such a shame that we have on one side, individuals who lie and then get pregnant and then on the other side, individuals who don't want to be responsible for their own child.

More skewed nonsense from MMO-Cs favorite basket case.

Next time on, "Out of Touch with Reality"... Does having a penis make you a criminal?



Who appoints these fuckers as topic starters? Why is it not considered spam?


[Infracted]

[Daws]

Just how does marriage mean being on the same page when it comes to children. It's far from unheard of for married people to have opposing views on kids and simply never tell there partner. If anything to my mind it's more likely that tampering with birth control is more common within a marriage as it amounts to one person forcing the other to have kids all under the tagline of well nothings 100% guaranteed I guess we just have to deal with whilst also operating under a much more solid base of having there partner along for the ride whilst the entire underhanded sneakiness plays out since there locked into a marriage. Tennisace's inability to understand human nature as always continues to amaze.

[Tennis]

Not a nice thing to stop using pills without the consent of the partner.

Indeed. Which is why people need to play it safe and not complain when they are duped.

[Total Crica]

And? You risk your life everyday getting out of bed... Sane people don't worry about low % risks

Sane people absolutely worry about low risks. And they plan accordingly.

[Tennis]

You keep spouting this

If you don't want kids use condoms alongside birth control

Wrong. He makes a good point. There is a chance condoms and other types of birth control can fail. This means there's always a chance a child can be conceived.

[Nurvus]

People need to be serious about their relationship before they get married.
Marriage doesn't elevate or improve anything. It's a celebration - the commitment must already be there.
If anything, people too often rush marriage to "fix" their relationship. It doesn't work.