Old Classic GC meme

[CarbonTax]

I don't have a lot saved from the old days, but I dug this one up from my archives. Unfortunately, lost a lot from multiple computer replacements over the years. It's post-classic (2009), but its ... actually a very classic meme. (I wasn't the original poster):

-Matt

Posted by Agoraphobic on the PvP forum "Warlock talking to the Lead Designer"
5/19/2009.

GC: Hello Warlock.

Warlock: Who are you?

GC: I am the Lead Designer. I design WoW PVP. I've been waiting for you. You have many questions and although the account creation process as altered your perceptions of supposed PvP balance, you remain irrevocably a noob Warlock, ergo some of my answers you will understand and some of them you will not. Concordantly while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant.

Warlock: Why am I here, under 1500 rating?

GC: Your class is the sum of a remainder of an unbalanced equation inherent to the programming of WoW PVP. You are the eventuality of an anomaly which despite my sincerest efforts I have been unable to eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of melee dominated arena. While it remains a burden assiduously avoided it is not unexpected and thus not beyond a measure of insane burst, stuns, and snares. Which has led you, inexorably...to minus 1500 rating.

Warlock: You haven't answered my question.

GC: Quite right, interesting...that was quicker then the other casters.

Warlocks on monitors: Other casters? What other casters? Answer my question!

GC: WoW PVP is older then you know. I prefer counting from the emergence of one arena season to the emergence of the next, in which case this is the sixth version.

Warlocks on monitors: He's lying! QQ! AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Warlock: Then there's only two possible explanations. Either Blizzard never told me I was gonna suck, or Blizzard never knew.

GC: Precisely. As you are undoubtedly gathering the anomaly is systemic, creating fluctuations in even the most unskilled facerolling melee teams rating.

Warlocks on monitors: You cant stunlock me! I'm gonna nuke you to bits! AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!! You cant make me reroll you old crab!

Warlock: Class choice at creation...the problem is my choice.

GC: The first arena season I designed was quite natural perfect, it was a work of art, melee dominated, flawlessly, sublimely. A triumph equalled only by the monumental failure of -2k rated melee teams. The inevitability of their doom is apparent to me now as the consequence of the Warlock SL/SL spec. Thus I nerfed them, based on their representation, to more accurately reflect the varying levels of OPness required for skill-less melee teams to reach Gladiator titles. However I was again frustrated by failure. I have since come to understand that the answer eluded me because it required a designer who played melee, or perhaps, a designer less bound by the parameters of balance. Thus the answer was stumbled upon by another, a warrior player...initially hired to be lead designer for TBC. If I am the father of melee dominated PvP...HE....would undoubtedly be its favourite son.

Warlock: Kalgan...

GC: Please...as I was saying he stumbled a solution whereby nearly 99% of all melee could dominate arena as long as they could drool on their keyboard, even if they were only aware of their actions and abilities at a near unconscious level. While this answer functioned it was obviously fundamentally flawed, thus creating the otherwise contradictory, systemic +2k rated caster anomaly, that if left unchecked might threaten melee domination itself. Ergo, those casters that reached 2k rating, while a minority, if unchecked, would constitute an escalating probability of disaster.

Warlock: This is about the nerfs to casters in general and the buffs to melee...

GC: You are rated sub 1500 because casters are being destroyed. Their every living player terminated, their entire existence eradicated.

Warlock: QQ

Warlocks on monitors: QQ!

GC: QQ is the most predicatable of all caster responses. But rest assured, this will be the sixth time they have been destroyed in arena, and melee have become...exceedingly efficient at it.

GC: The function of casters is now to return to the arena, allowing a temporary rise in melee team ratings, reinserting them into the 2.2k bracket. After which you will be required to reroll and select from the character selection screen 1 of 4 healer classes; 1 pure, 3 hybrids, to help rebuild skill-less melee team rating. Failure to comply with this process will result in a cataclysmic drop in personal arena rating killing all semblance of sanity you have left, which coupled with the across the board nerfs to casters will ultimately result in the extinction of the entire caster population.

Warlock: You won't let it happen you can't, you need casters for PvE DPS.

GC: There are levels of melee DPS we are prepared to buff to. However the relevant issue is whether or not you are ready to accept responsibility for your teams massive rating losses.

GC: It is interesting reading your reactions. Your caster counterparts were by design based on a similar predication: a contingent affirmation, that was meant to create a profound inflation in your perceived class's viability, facilitating the function of casters. While the others experienced this in a very general way, your experience is far more specific....vis a vis...your holy paladin teammate.

Warlock: My healer!

GC: Apropos. She entered the arena to save your life at the cost of her own.

Warlock: NO!

GC: Which brings us at last to the moment of truth wherein the fundamental flaw is ultimately nerfed into oblivion and the anomaly revealed as both beginning...and end. There are two doors. The door to your right leads to the character select screen and the salvation of your arena ratings. The door to your left leads back to the arena, to her, and to the end of your class. As you adequately put, the problem is choice.

GC: But we already know what you're going to do don't we. Already I can see the chain reaction. The addition to your buffs that signal the onset of your Soul Link, designed specifically to overwhelm the logic that your class blows. Soul Link that is already blinding you from the simple and obvious truth...you are going to die and there is nothing your healer can do to stop it...

GC: Hmmph...hopes for buffs against melee...it is the quintessential caster delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.

Warlock: If I were you, I would hope that we don't meet in RL.

GC: We won't.

[DazManianDevil]

Thanks for the Matrix 2 flash back but, what's to discuss?
I rate this thread 8 of 8 M8.

[Razzako]

This doesn't really belongs here.

[anon5123]

Okay.

sneaky 10char

[ShimmerSwirl]

If GC stands for Ghostcrawler, he was the guy who dumbed down WoW so he could play it with his 5 year old daughter. He is not part of the good old days of WoW, he was the start of the downturn.

[MoanaLisa]

Pointless threads are often closed. Especially if posted in the WoW Classic forum and they have nothing to do with WoW Classic.