Can you elaborate on your issues with "abilities that do the same thing, but different animation" - like which abilities do this and in what way would you condense them. Just curious because I'm struggling to think of many that behave like this, whereas there are in fact abilities that need condensing; like there is no reason why both trances, bahamut, akh morn and revalation should be one button. There is no reason ruin 3 should not serve as the combo button for Brand and fountain inside Phoenix when despite the fact one does not actually require the other, it is illogical to ever spam Fountain of Fire even on Single Target - and you cannot skip trances.
In terms of visual indicator for procs I don't have this issue personally, maybe adjust your UI to have your buffs set up in a way where you're not looking at your bars? Also in terms of the "goofyness" - this is standard Final Fantasy lol. The key element in it is supposed to be goofing around and having fun, it's not a hardcore "muh blood and thunder" RPG.