Doesn't everyone want love?

[Deleted]

It's an odd thing to love someone. Whatever logical reasons we use to describe love; chemical reactions in the brain to encourage the survival of the species or a socially constructed feeling (that's actually one idea), it is an illogical and pervasive element of life. What I find most odd is the seeming ability to turn the ability to love on and off. I don't mean romantic love in this case but platonic love, love for your fellow man.

Is it really that unusual to want to love everyone? To find redeeming aspects of the lowest dreg of the lowest city just because we've all felt alone, scared and abandoned. Isn't it not good, but necessary, now more than ever to admit these things? The admission that something is wrong with our society, not that we're using too much oil and might be killing our planet, not that we're running out of resources for a growing society or that we're finding more and more reasons to forget common decency. But that we're not remembering from day to day, to love one another in some form or way, not because it'll solve all our problems. It won't stop oil running out, it won't stop markets collapsing and it won't make more basic materials appear (i.e. There's not enough copper in the world to facilitate the Chinese population to the degree of Europeans and American's). But maybe it might make it easier to deal with, certainly make the way we react to difficulties different.

It seems not a day goes by where you can find some story of a horrific event that stemmed from some, frankly pathetic, rash response. Like the 14 year old who's being tried for murder in New York. How is it that a society can exist on this level with such general callousness? Not direct mind you, most people maintain a pleasant exterior. Is empathy really quite such a rare thing? Not patronizing pity, often merely a response born of guilt or an attempt to feel superior. We're all vain and petty at times, but it's hard to say it's the case when "at times" seems to cover the majority of time.

But perhaps I'm wrong, or I'm too critical or expect too much. Maybe we're meant to not care all the time because when you do it's not healthy, maybe it's right to be selfish sometimes if only to remind you why we mustn't be. Chances are that it's more "natural" to withhold empathy to the majority for self preservation.

What sparked this thread was a video, you've probably seen it already but I'd rather not link it. Suffice to say a mentally disabled man was tasered by a police officer then kicked to subdue him. But then again he wasn't actually doing anything that required subduing. What's worse was the person filming hopes for this to happen, then pretends to be concerned at the end of the video.

Well what do you think? Do you think my idea of the "right" amount of compassion is too much? Too little? Sentimentality or insanity? I'm aware it's not healthy for me:P But it's not all bad, you get to meet some very unusual people.

[Dacien]

People will react and behave however they feel possessed to at any given time. I can be an abrasive individual, but if someone is kind to me, it's like flipping a switch; I just feel like being a nice person. And so I am. Again, people behave according to how they feel at any given time.

[apepi]

It's not that i do not want love, it is that no one wants to love me...

[Deleted]

People will react and behave however they feel possessed to at any given time. I can be an abrasive individual, but if someone is kind to me, it's like flipping a switch; I just feel like being a nice person. And so I am. Again, people behave according to how they feel at any given time.

Which implies they can control it. So what's the point in not controlling it for the betterment of not only yourself, but those around you? Leading by example is the only real way to change anything. But I again I neither condone or condemn anyone's actions, I'm merely questioning their motivations.

[Dhurn]

You can't be that open or sensitive or loving because frankly, people will take advantage of it unless youre very careful who you surround yourself with. Most people are just protecting themselves.

[Deleted]

It's not that i do not want love, it is that no one wants to love me...

More people love you than you'd think, I'd buy you a beer at any rate:P Well I'm Irish, any excuse for beer and a pub=s

---------- Post added 2011-09-02 at 03:13 AM ----------

You can't be that open or sensitive or loving because frankly, people will take advantage of it unless youre very careful who you surround yourself with. Most people are just protecting themselves.

Well you're going to get hurt anyway. I see it more worth while to give people a chance, without being naive, than to withhold affection.

[apepi]

More people love you than you'd think, I'd buy you a beer at any rate:P Well I'm Irish, any excuse for beer and a pub=s

If I ever go to Ireland, ill take you up on your offer:}

[Deleted]

If I ever go to Ireland, ill take you up on your offer:}

County Cork, An Brog bar, pints 3 euro till 11. I'll even buy ya 2

[Deleted]

It's not that i do not want love, it is that no one wants to love me...

Naaaawhhhh *Zurg Hug*

O.o ..... *shoots a pony*

All better now


Anyway, yeah I'll mostly give people a chance when I just meet ehm and all that, if I would call that love? meeh, more being kind, also I'll be quite (did I spell it correctly?) easy going even when they just act like a dick. Dunno what's up with that, it happens. However at times I can also act like an incredible dick, so yeaaaah, what's up with that?

Emotions, how do they work?

[Deleted]

i just want to be left alone i like being... Alone nice and calm.

[Deleted]

Naaaawhhhh *Zurg Hug*

O.o ..... *shoots a pony*

All better now

I'll gladly murder those Ponies. Oh god, if only.....if only.....

---------- Post added 2011-09-02 at 03:30 AM ----------

i just want to be left alone i like being... Alone nice and calm.

Well it's a fairly common psychological observation that isolation is extremely unhealthy and breeds multiple other forms of mental issues. You mean you like being left alone with the assurance of someone around when you want them?

[Dacien]

Which implies they can control it. So what's the point in not controlling it for the betterment of not only yourself, but those around you? Leading by example is the only real way to change anything. But I again I neither condone or condemn anyone's actions, I'm merely questioning their motivations.

Perhaps, but feelings can be very powerful. How many times have we heard, "I just lost my temper," or, "I was so depressed I didn't want to get out of bed." People very much act purely on emotion, over which how much control they really have is debatable. Some are better at this than others, of course.

[apepi]

County Cork, An Brog bar, pints 3 euro till 11. I'll even buy ya 2

Ot:If you ever come to Louisiana, tell me, and I would do the same..(well maybe in 3 years>.<)

Most love is ineffable, unable to describe, so I think what you are fishing for is why people can not be nicer/empathetic?(though you could have to much..)

[Deleted]

Perhaps, but feelings can be very powerful. How many times have we heard, "I just lost my temper," or, "I was so depressed I didn't want to get out of bed." People very much act purely on emotion, over which how much control they really have is debatable. Some are better at this than others, of course.

I agree, to a degree. Anyone can teach themselves to control themselves by identifying why they're feeling that way. For example anger; if you can express why you're angry you're much less likely to actually be angry. Same with depression, yes depression sucks but you can overcome it with enough willpower, and support (hence the love thing:P)

[Selkhet]

Love can be a very destructive force, if misused. It can easily be corrupted and become hate.

[Deleted]

I'll gladly murder those Ponies. Oh god, if only.....if only.....

In due time young padawan, with the proper training and patience we might some day get our time.

Well it's a fairly common psychological observation that isolation is extremely unhealthy and breeds multiple other forms of mental issues. You mean you like being left alone with the assurance of someone around when you want them?

I like being alone in a sense, or I just can't stand being surrounded by idiots (or I'm the idiot, however you float your boat, talking about floating your boat, what's up with that? Why not how you steer your boat?) , but when I see people more often than a few hours a week I start getting a bit, how to call it....it's a weird feeling I can't really explain... There's only a few people I don't have this with.

[Deleted]

Ot:If you ever come to Louisiana, tell me, and I would do the same..(well maybe in 3 years>.<)

Most love is ineffable, unable to describe, so I think what you are fishing for is why people can not be nicer/empathetic?(though you could have to much..)

Nope. I mean genuine love, not romantic or brotherly/family, just genuine platonic love. A consideration for others feelings and an affection just because we're all going through life half blind with one good leg and not enough hands to man the ship. Because we're all creeping up on that big black wall of nothingness and we're in it together, right to the end. Because nobody should be alone all the way and nobody deserves to be abandoned to it.

---------- Post added 2011-09-02 at 03:38 AM ----------

Love can be a very destructive force, if misused. It can easily be corrupted and become hate.

I was always told "Love and hate; a fine line". Well if it's so fine why not just step over? Hating does nothing but cause bother, for both parties. Just clasp hands, have a drink and laugh at the futility of it all.

[CyborgOctopus]

[Deleted]

Please note: I hated the hippy movement of the 60's. That is all.

[CyborgOctopus]

Please note: I hated the hippy movement of the 60's. That is all.

sure sure, you're either ruthless or a hippy. No grey area