Hard to say, but I think I could resist temptation. Not in a relationship right now, but I consider myself a trustworthy person and I expect the same of my partners. I would be even put off if a girl dumped their boyfriend to get with me (if thats the best legitimate reason at least).... if I consider that important, I don't think I could ever cheat and live with the guilt.
If you fool around with someone else, usually it's a sign there is something wrong with your relationship. It really doesn't have much to do with how attractive the person is. So, to answer your question, No... I have never fooled around with someone else, If something doesn't work out, I would rather end it rather than someone being deeply hurt.
Why do so many of you continue to equate monogomy with trust, they are not the same thing. Two people can trust and love each other while at the same time having sexual fantasies and experiances with a person other than thier commited partner.
If this is understood beforehand it is in no way a violation of trust as it was not implied to begin with, furthermore where does this continual assumption come in to play that the moment two people begin dating they are 'exclusive'?
Now the point I, and a couple others have been hammering at here is that everyone wants to be with someone other than their lover, spouse, bf, gf, or otherwise significant other at some point for some reason if only in a fanstastical sense. If you have ever looked at another person and imagined, if only in your mind for a moment, what it would be like to have sex with them, you wanted to cheat. Just because you did not act on the desire does not mean the desire did not exist! I cannot stress this enough, just because we have a desire to do something does not mean we will automatically act on that desire, those are base instincts, and being able to overcome our instincts is one of the key differences between us and wild animals.
Ok, I cant recall if I said I wasnt going to post again before or not but go ahead flame me with more of your 'I would never cheat and your a monster for suggesting I would' nonsense again.
I couldn't. Not that I never appreciate other men's looks, or if they're hot, but I've just never found sex so important as to ruin a relationship of a lifetime for a fling. I value my relationship with my fiancee far above what I could ever experience in bed with a stranger. And I know that goes both ways with us.
I do not understand these "other women" either. I couldn't imagine sleeping with a man I knew to be married or in a relationship. I can't imagine I would feel all that proud of myself. (This goes to "other men" too, but I think it's bit more common the other way around?)
I don't really understand the whole concept either. If you have promised your spouse fidelity, sleeping with another person is a direct violation to their trust. If you cannot keep your hands off other people when you're in a relationship, you shouldn't be in a relationship. If you want a relationship with the person you're with, you don't cheat. That simple.
Now, open relationships are a different matter altogether, but I think that would be really hard to handle without any jealousy. I've met a person who had an open relationship with his girlfriend. He was very popular with women and I really do not wonder why. I never met his girlfriend though, so I cannot know what she really thought about it.
Would I fuck someone else? Definitely, if they were hotter and I was attracted to them.
But I'd confess afterwards.
As I've said before, if you want an open relationship and speak about it with your significant other first then okay. If not, and your partner is expecting you not to, then do not cheat. It's as simple as that. Stop being a weak fuck and hurting your partner.
I personally will never have any sexual experiences with anybody other than my significant other, and guess what, I'm happy with that. She satisfies my needs, and I don't need anybody else. Have I ever thought about it being with anybody but her? Yes, when I was 14 and young, but I actually dislike the idea of being with anybody else but her. That was about it.
We've been together for almost 7 years now, and unlike ag666's belief, I'm only really interested in her. Do I find other girls attractive? Of course, but I don't have the urge to cheat, regardless what some kid thinks on the internet. (:
Arrogant, and ignorant. That's some bad qualities. I guess you'll realize someday not everybody's like you. (:
I have an open relationship with my boyfriend, so we can fool around with others as much as we want to. As long as we don't tell eachother about it.
And it doesn't happen so often. If you love your partner you kinda want to stay with only him/her but sure, sometimes it's nice to be with someone else for a night just as long it's only sex and nothing else.
Honestly, I see myself being the one that's cheated on, because I just don't care enough to prevent things like this from happening, and because I don't shower people with love and affection, even if they're my significant other. I would not be surprised if the blame for their cheating was placed on me, because it was likely my fault, because I didn't 'love' them enough.
To answer whether or not I would personally: Would I? No. Would I feel guilty about it? No. Would I tell my significant other? No.
If I can't be the sex symbol, then I can definitely be the BITCH
Relationships vary from person to person and situation to situation. Some people have monogamous relationships full of love and trust that last their entire lives, other people suffer in a situation not of their choosing or based on following social conventions that run contrary to their natures. Fidelity, as I see it, is a contract with one's partner on the terms of a relationship amicable to both parties... rules are set, boundaries observed, and conventions agreed upon to the benefit of everyone involved. If you are looking for a 1-on-1, completely monogamous relationship with another person then by all means seek it out... just remember to ensure your partner agrees and can live with your terms. The same is a true of an open relationship... if you respect your partner, you ensure that they understand the nature of the relationship from the outset.
Fidelity means a lot of things... but the essence is in not betraying your partner's expectations and trust in you. For some people, this extends to sex with other people... for others, it is a more emotionally-centered quality and doesn't extend to the act of sex. If you find a partner (or partners) that agree with you on the terms, you'll have a difficult time of being unfaithful unless you set out explicitly to break their trust in you.
Last edited by Aucald; 2011-11-28 at 03:34 PM.
"We're more of the love, blood, and rhetoric school. Well, we can do you blood and love without the rhetoric, and we can do you blood and rhetoric without the love, and we can do you all three concurrent or consecutive. But we can't give you love and rhetoric without the blood. Blood is compulsory. They're all blood, you see." ― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead
I'll never meet that girl, so I won't remember you. Just another face in the crowd who believes he knows everything based on people he has met before, yet doesn't know how far off that is.
It's the same as the people who told me her and I wouldn't last past High School, and Middle School, and so on.
Peace ~ Believe what you want, it doesn't matter since we're never going to talk again, but if we ever do: you'll see that girl never came along.
Last edited by crylo; 2011-11-28 at 07:47 PM.
I watched my parents deal with a matter of infidelity when I was a child. They're still married 15 years later, but the tension over the incident remains strong. After seeing what they went through in the first few years afterwards, I could never bring myself to do that to someone else (provided I'd be in my right mind--alcohol is a hell of a drug).
If you find someone that you want to cheat with, then simply break up with your current significant other first.
If you are not willing to break up with your significant other then obviously the person you are interested in is not worth cheating with...
If you have an open relationship things are a bit different as it may not be considered cheating in the first place