Unmarried couples calling each other husband/wife

[Egomaniac]

What next, are couples not allowed to call eachother baby because neither person LITERALLY IS A CHILD?

Go outside for once and stop giving a fuck what other people do in the privacy of their own lives, that's the LGBTQ+ argument against anti-LGBTQ+ people, no?

That's the very worst thing about this. A gay person telling other people that they need the government's approval before they are allowed to call each other husband and wife (or husband/husband, wife/wife, etc, etc. etc.).

It's like the immigrant getting off the boat at Ellis Island and then turning around and telling the people in line behind him to get out of his country.

[Deus Mortis]

So your now your being judgmental for what two people want to call their relationship which seems a strange hill for you of all people to fight on.... Of all your soapbox threads this ranks as one of the worst. Shame on me for continuing to read them.

[draynay]

I don't understand why literally every single one of your posts makes a reference to you being gay.

It must be hard not having a personality and having to base one's identity around something as trivial as sexual preference.

[Polyxo]

I'm reminded of the time when I was like 15 or so when certain friends of mine and I called each other wife and wife, and husband and wife or whatever just for fun. I'm going to bring that back out of petty spite for OP.

[kamuimac]

Ok so I have a little rant I'd like to get off my chest. One thing that really bugs the fuck out of me is when I hear unmarried couples calling each other husband or wife. I'm not referring to couples who have been together for 10+ years or even couples that are engaged (even though if you're engaged you're only fiance to each other not husband/wife yet). Being in the gay community I gave same sex couples a pass for a long time when they would refer to who they're with as their husband or wife simply because until 2015 it wasn't legal for same sex couples to get married here in the USA. Now that it is legal, there are still unmarried gay couples who refer to their significant other as their "spouse" or "husband" or "wife". No, you have chosen not to go down to the courthouse and file with the courts to be legally married like people can do so no that isn't your "spouse", that isn't your "husband", and that isn't your "wife". That's your partner, your girlfriend/boyfriend, or your fiance if you're engaged. If you want to call each other "husband" or "wife" then bite the bullet and make it legal with all the protections, benefits, and drawbacks of being legally married. You are simply in a relationship where at any point in time one person can simply leave the other's life with no consequences at all. I've been with my boyfriend (technically fiance) for 7 years now and 2 years ago I popped the question and he said yes. I don't refer to him as my husband because he's not. Yes we've been together a long time, but we're not married. Our plans for getting married are either 1-2 years after I finish nursing school or within a year of winning the lottery...whichever comes first. Until then, he will simply be my boyfriend...my fiance. Prior to 2015's ruling to allow same sex marriage some of my family mentioned how he was basically my husband which truthfully was the case. We made decisions about our unit together. We planned for the future that involved both of us. But we could not get married at the time. Now that we can, we will plan for our future and await the day we do say our vows. Basically what I'm getting at is, I'm sorry Karen and Chad but you're not married so stop calling each other husband and wife since all you're doing is playing house right now.

nothing surprising there really - people finaly are realising that they dont need the "official documents" for anything and that it would only cause them problems with divorces.

whenever people look for more freedom is good for society overall.

plus this gives them more freedom if they choose to live in "non-conventional but more natural" way - saves them problem with bigamy etc which in most countries is illegal (for no real reason)

[Saltysquidoon]

People get stung in Australia all the time because a defacto partnership (which is functionally the same as a common-law marriage and is only called that due to a whole bunch of boomer political shenanigans from the 90s about what exactly constitutes marriage much the same as what the OP is doing) is generated and binding by as little as 12 months of cohabitation (watch out friends with benefits roomies).

It's swings and roundabouts really.

[Mihalik]

sip.

Jesus fucking Christ on a pony.

Paragraph dude!!! Paragraph! You are not a political prisoner in a gulag writing your magnum opus on a roll of fucking toilet paper.

Please. Paragraph.

Also, why the fuck do you care? Does it in any way affect your life?

I'm freaked the shit out by women calling their SO "daddy". I think it's creepy as fuck, but in the end it's none of my business.

A couple of years ago I had to travel to Dubai for work, GF really really wanted to come, but it is technically illegal for unwed couples (including foreigners) to share rooms there. Hotels/business have a sort of don't ask/don't tell policy, and the authorities usually don't require marriage certificates from tourists, but you're nevertheless advised to refer to each other in public as husband/wife.

Which we did for 10 days.

Other people might do it for other reasons, it's not your job to police that.

[Kathandira]

Ok so I have a little rant I'd like to get off my chest. One thing that really bugs the fuck out of me is when I hear unmarried couples calling each other husband or wife. I'm not referring to couples who have been together for 10+ years or even couples that are engaged (even though if you're engaged you're only fiance to each other not husband/wife yet). Being in the gay community I gave same sex couples a pass for a long time when they would refer to who they're with as their husband or wife simply because until 2015 it wasn't legal for same sex couples to get married here in the USA. Now that it is legal, there are still unmarried gay couples who refer to their significant other as their "spouse" or "husband" or "wife". No, you have chosen not to go down to the courthouse and file with the courts to be legally married like people can do so no that isn't your "spouse", that isn't your "husband", and that isn't your "wife". That's your partner, your girlfriend/boyfriend, or your fiance if you're engaged. If you want to call each other "husband" or "wife" then bite the bullet and make it legal with all the protections, benefits, and drawbacks of being legally married. You are simply in a relationship where at any point in time one person can simply leave the other's life with no consequences at all. I've been with my boyfriend (technically fiance) for 7 years now and 2 years ago I popped the question and he said yes. I don't refer to him as my husband because he's not. Yes we've been together a long time, but we're not married. Our plans for getting married are either 1-2 years after I finish nursing school or within a year of winning the lottery...whichever comes first. Until then, he will simply be my boyfriend...my fiance. Prior to 2015's ruling to allow same sex marriage some of my family mentioned how he was basically my husband which truthfully was the case. We made decisions about our unit together. We planned for the future that involved both of us. But we could not get married at the time. Now that we can, we will plan for our future and await the day we do say our vows. Basically what I'm getting at is, I'm sorry Karen and Chad but you're not married so stop calling each other husband and wife since all you're doing is playing house right now.

Ranting for the sake of ranting aside, what does it matter? If you aren't asked to refer to their spouse as their husband or wife, then it has no affect on you or anyone else.

[Dezerte]

I wouldn't care, not my business. I'm more perplexed that you find this so rant-worthy, maybe I should make a rant about that.

[Shadowferal]

Heck, had I been shacked up with a significant other for years, and had children I'd be calling her "my wife."

...shacked?
...shackled?
...hmf...the ball and chain...o..bedroom stuff. No ones business...ya.

[Svifnymr]

Don't you know?

It's not a real relationship until you have the paperwork filled out in triplicate.

And make sure you use the new cover sheets before you send them out. Did you get the memo?

That was my answer to the gay marriage "question". "Marriage shouldn't have any legal benefits or status, so I don't care what people call themselves." I can't imagine raging at "husband/wife" titles when the person isn't legally married, at least no more than other stupid things people call each other. I had a friend that married someone, but was in a relationship with kid with someone else. Called the latter his wife and never referred to the former at all.

But, I mean, this is a forum on the internet, so it's not like a rant really costs anything, right?

- - - Updated - - -

This comes across a lot like the anti-lgbtq crowd ranting about marriage. Stop caring about how other people choose to identify and live their lives when it does exactly no harm to you.

I think it's more of the status question. "You can't call yourself that, because it has to be EARNED! I'm earning it, you're NOT!" But yeah, the similarities are there for sure.

[Shadowferal]

I've said my opinion. But...for those against calling themselves whatever.. "half" or child support is about "legality" and that might lead to an can of worms that no one wants opened.

[Grimbold21]

This didn't go the way you planned, did it OP?

[Nastard]

I never understood how the state recognizing a marriage somehow makes the union more legitimate. Love comes from within, not from what some stranger stamps on a piece of legal document. Two people who just met and know jack shit about each other can get legally married, so having that certificate doesn't mean a damn thing. If two people aren't legally bonded together but still profess undying love for the rest of their lives, I don't believe that means they're any less in love.

"If they love each other that much why not just pull the trigger?" Good question but some couples have their reasons for not getting married, particularly if they don't plan on having children. Societal pressure isn't reason enough. Proving to relatives the love is "real" isn't reason enough. Throwing an expensive party where the bride gets to pretend to be a princess for a day isn't reason enough. I absolutely believe in the concept of being with a single person for the rest of my life, but think marriage is an outdated concept whose meaning has all but evaporated over time. You don't get married to prove to a person she's the one for you. You treat her with respect, love, and friendship every single minute you're with her and THAT's how you show it. Marriage is when you feels the need to prove it to everyone else, but true love has never been about what other people think.

The OP reeks of someone who got married for the wrong reason (to prove to others) and feels like their territory is being encroached upon by couples who didn't "earn" it. If that's true, I feel very sorry for you. I hope you're able to find true love someday; the kind of love so genuine that you can call your partner "wife" or "husband" without feeling that the lack of State involvement doesn't delegitimize your feelings.

[PosPosPos]

Lack of paragraphing and barely understandable drivel underscores the minimum effort OP put in to pretend they are not flat out trying to troll the crap out of readers.

And as the thread hasn't been closed yet, it's pretty obvious it's an effective strategy.

[Egomaniac]

Lack of paragraphing and barely understandable drivel underscores the minimum effort OP put in to pretend they are not flat out trying to troll the crap out of readers.

And as the thread hasn't been closed yet, it's pretty obvious it's an effective strategy.

I wish it was just trolling. But, if it is, then every other thread made by OP is as well.

[PosPosPos]

I wish it was just trolling. But, if it is, then every other thread made by OP is as well.

That's not really how it works.

Plenty of posters here troll intermittently, rather than on a constant or regular basis.

[Egomaniac]

That's not really how it works.

Plenty of posters here troll intermittently, rather than on a constant or regular basis.

What I am saying is that this thread is consistent with every other thread the OP has created...even down to the poor formatting.

[PosPosPos]

What I am saying is that this thread is consistent with every other thread the OP has created...even down to the poor formatting.

And I am saying just because OP doesn't generally troll with their threads doesn't mean they can't be trolling with this one.

[Unholyground]

Marriage is a construct of humans to begin with, we made it there is nothing really special about it other than what you mean to each other but you don't need a legal paper to for that.