Why is it okay to ask someone if they are planning on having kids?

[Slant]

Hey guys,

I find it so creepy and weird someone would ask another couple that. It's such a rude question and awkward question, when did it become acceptable ?

Is it? So, I'm guessing you don't intend to have kids then?

[Super Kami Dende]

Or, you know, they could have one of the other dozen possible reasons.

Possible other reasons? Well anything is possible. Chances are aren't any is much more likely.

[Raqubor]

Why is it okay to ask anything at all?

Lets ban all forms of communication so we never have to encounter any unexpected situation.

Everyone just keep quiet, heads down as we walk down the streets.

No triggering, no questions - just blissful silence...

I would actually prefer that. Leave me the fuck alone.

Also: Fuck kids. Not literally.

[Slant]

I would actually prefer that. Leave me the fuck alone.

Says the guy posting on a forum...

[Raqubor]

Says the guy posting on a forum...

We're not on the street. It's all just faceless voices here.

[Slant]

We're not on the street. It's all just faceless voices here.

So? I'm still judging you.

[Vargulf the Happy Husky]

there is nothing offensive about that question, parents like to make conversation with couples that may or may not have kids. its called FINDING COMMON GROUND.

Lighten up man

[Raqubor]

So? I'm still judging you.

Uhm... ok. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Slant]

Uhm... ok. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Fuck, it's hard not to like the post.

[ItachiZaku]

I (we) got asked this maybe 3 weeks back, gorgeous friend and I were out to lunch and the server asked how long we'd been together, since we've eaten there a lot and she'd recognized us. We'd basically both said in unison we're besties cuz our besties both had kids and we don't like kids, so hanging with out besties while their kids are around (both under a year and... very cranky) just ruins our day.

Felt like she wanted to push us together "I always thought you two looked so cute together" lol yadda yadda. Didn't really seem rude, but it's in the ball park of becoming rude - which is exactly how I feel the "having kids" question can come off. As others have mentioned, there can be a lot of heartache associated with the question for some and in 2016, more and more people just don't want to go down that kid having path.

[Deleted]

I (we) got asked this maybe 3 weeks back, gorgeous friend and I were out to lunch and the server asked how long we'd been together, since we've eaten there a lot and she'd recognized us. We'd basically both said in unison we're besties cuz our besties both had kids and we don't like kids, so hanging with out besties while their kids are around (both under a year and... very cranky) just ruins our day.

Felt like she wanted to push us together "I always thought you two looked so cute together" lol yadda yadda. Didn't really seem rude, but it's in the ball park of becoming rude - which is exactly how I feel the "having kids" question can come off. As others have mentioned, there can be a lot of heartache associated with the question for some and in 2016, more and more people just don't want to go down that kid having path.

I still don't get why it triggers people so much. It is just a simple question, like where you're from?/are you single?/what plans for the future do you have?
You are not obligated to answer, but you have no right to get mad at people for asking those questions, unless they intentionally ask them to make you uncomfortable.

People are curious creatures and you can't live under a rock.
If you don't want to have kids that's perfectly fine, but you can't honestly expect people to read your mind, thus they ask so that they know your stance of the issue.
Getting mad at them for doing something they have no idea bothers you, especially when you don't tell them, just makes you look petty, selfish and anti-social.

[ItachiZaku]

I still don't get why it triggers people so much. It is just a simple question, like where you're from?/are you single?/what plans for the future do you have?
You are not obligated to answer, but you have no right to get mad at people for asking those questions, unless they intentionally ask them to make you uncomfortable.

Just the very unintentional uncomfortability. Every question can have that same triggering of the unknown. "Aww, cute puppy" "OMG I just lost my dog of 20 years, he was the ugliest dog ever but i always called him cute cuz he seemed to perk up a bit like he knew he was ugly, so how far you call this one cute! Asshole!" but since people have attachments to kids, it can hit a bit harder I suppose.

[Skayaq]

"Kids are the best!"
"I love my kids more than anything else!"
"I wouldn't know what do without my kids!"
"I didn't know what was missing in my life before I had kids!"

Well, I guess what ever helps them get up in morning.

Yeah, really hate people who makes such comments, just makes me wants to smack their smug little faces.

[Deleted]

Hey guys,

I find it so creepy and weird someone would ask another couple that. It's such a rude question and awkward question, when did it become acceptable ?

I find it creepy that you find totally normal question rude.

There's nothing rude about it.

[Deleted]

Yeah, really hate people who makes such comments, just makes me wants to smack their smug little faces.

Not as much as I hate people who say things like:


"A 3-year-old psychopathic tornado just tore through our house."

"My mom said the K word again..."


"I barely remember to feed the fish. If I wake at 2am it's to empty my bladder, not feed a child"




Along with delightful words such as: Mombie, Dadicts, Breeders, etc.

Childless people can be just as rude.

[TwoNineMarine]

Hey guys,

I find it so creepy and weird someone would ask another couple that. It's such a rude question and awkward question, when did it become acceptable ?

Wut?

Lol man people sure are sensitive these days.

[Deleted]

Wut?

Lol man people sure are sensitive these days.

I know right?
People just can't be honest with each other anymore. It's like they have to navigate a labyrinth of social conventions just to have a normal, friendly conversation, or else God forbid, someone gets triggered and throws a hissy fit on reddit.

[TwoNineMarine]

I know right?
People just can't be honest with each other anymore. It's like they have to navigate a labyrinth of social conventions just to have a normal, friendly conversation, or else God forbid, someone gets triggered and throws a hissy fit on reddit.

Oh God. I don't touch Reddit anymore. I thought the chat here was bad until I swung by over there lol

[Cosmic Janitor]

Yeah, really hate people who makes such comments, just makes me wants to smack their smug little faces.

Comment as in my comment, which then would imply I offended you, most likely because I hit the mark, which in turn would make me revel in the knowledge that I did just that.
Or comment as in the hollow shit people say to pretend their pointless existence is something more despite being miserable?

Hmm, I just realized that either way works for me .

[Skayaq]

Comment as in my comment, which then would imply I offended you, most likely because I hit the mark, which in turn would make me revel in the knowledge that I did just that.
Or comment as in the hollow shit people say to pretend their pointless existence is something more despite being miserable?

Hmm, I just realized that either way works for me .

Second one.