Not good with women? Be confident!

[Levitt]

Alright boys, Levitt here for a 101 session on getting the ladies.

I will provide to you a list of common hindrances that stop you fellas from getting with the girls as well as a good solution to getting past them.

-I'm overweight - BE CONFIDENT
-I have bad acne - BE CONFIDENT
-I choke when I talk to girls - BE CONFIDENT
-I don't know what to talk about - BE CONFIDENT
-She's out of my league - BE CONFIDENT
-I don't smell good - For the love of god, take a shower. But BE CONFIDENT when you swag step out of that shower.

Okay, okay. Now, I'm sure you're all thinking "Great, another one of these threads. Saying "Be confident" is easy, but the actual confidence is much harder than just saying it."

To those who think that way, there's only two ways to gain this confidence:

-Experience. At some point, you're going to have to put all your chips on the table and approach the girl you've been not-so-discretely checking out all night. You will undoubtedly get rejected at some point - everyone does. There will come a time, however, when one girl responds positively to your attempts at being this guy. Once you get one that takes the bait, the next ones will come easier and easier. Why? Because you've had more experience (hopefully learning what to and not to say), and you'll be much more confident in your approach.

-Look in the mirror and ask yourself "Do I like how I look?". If you answer no, ask yourself "What do I not like about myself?". Then ask yourself "Is this something I can change?". If the answer is yes, CHANGE IT. If no, learn to IGNORE IT. I did this 2 years ago. I sat there and looked at myself in the mirror. I got a nice glance of a growing double chin, man boobs, and a mangled set of hair. While I was working on the lines to woo the ladies, they'd never see past my 5'10", 285lb exterior. Could I change these things? Without a doubt. I wanted to get with the ladies, and, like it or not, looks are the first impression. I took my ass to the gym, stopped eating fast food, pop, etc., and the weight just fell off. I found a good barber and got a fresh cut and managed to drop over a hundred pounds over the next 2 years.

That being said, there were things I could not change. Unfortunately, I sweat like it's the middle of July whenever I'm in the club. Is it pleasant? Of course not. Do ladies notice? Of course they do. Do I give 2 shits? Not at all. It used to bother me, but I can't do anything about it. It's completely out of my hands. If the girl I'm dancing with mentions it, I just nonchalantly say something alone the lines of "It's just part of the package deal, babe."

I've done it, and so can you.

And since people love comprehensive, concise lists; here's a list of things I recommend that you can do today to improve your game:

-Stop using bar soap! As much as ladies love the lovely scent of unscented Dove bar soap, you'll get a better response from a scented body gel such as Old Spice: After Hours - that's what I use.

-Get a quality cologne. Every guy needs one. Nothing overbearing or cheap (in this case, avoid the Axe / Old Spice brands. Those are cool if you're trying to impress a chick in high school at the roller rink, but if you're trying to attract a woman, you need to smell like a man - not a boy). There's plenty of room for expirimentation here, but I swear by Hanae Mori for men. It's got a solid musk, but nothing overbearing. When they get close, it makes them want to stay there.

-Dress nice. The graphic tee of Spider Man vol. 1 is great for relaxing around the house, but invest in at least a few quality button-ups, a couple pairs of NICE jeans, a nice pair of dress shoes, and a nice pair of tennis shoes / sneakers. Women notice how you dress second only to the physique of the man wearing the clothes. From my experience, they judge the shoes harder than anything else. If you've got to skimp on any of those areas, avoid the shoes.

(And don't be afraid to unbutton one (or two) more buttons than you'd generally have buttoned up. Experiment and see how it works for you.)

-Don't get ready before you need to. I know, you're excited. You've got the nice clothes, you smell nice, and you're ready to hit the town. But please, don't wake up at 10:30 AM, shower, and get dressed. First off, you're probably not going out until at least 6 or 7. Furthermore, the stains, wrinkles, and general deteriation of good scent that the events of the day-to-day bring about are all game-killers when it comes to talking to the ladies.

-This brings up another point - USE AN IRON. If you don't know how to, LEARN! Once mastered, it's a very easy way to bring your whole outfit up a couple notches.

-If you're wearing black, use a lint roller.

-Be confident; not cocky. Some may argue that "nice guys finish last" - and that's pretty much true. The nice guys don't ever get anywhere. Sorry. That being said, you don't have to be a complete prick to a woman just to get her attention. There's plenty of room for variance between "Hey beautiful, I knew from the first moment I laid eyes on you that we were meant to be together forever." and "b**** get your tiny a** over here." Be creative and find your niche.

-Have fun! That's the most important thing. All the clothing, cologne, and work is useless if you're not enjoying yourself. I really can't emphasize this enough. You only live once - so live it up!

Alright boys (and all you ladies who may be here to critique), I hope this post serves to get you mad game today, tomorrow, and forever! (And please don't ever say things like that in front of a woman. Just because she's wearing heels doesn't mean she won't sprint the hell away from you.)

Levitt

[Muni]

Sorry but if you're over-weight and have bad acne...don't expect to find anyone unless they themselves are overweight+have bad acne. Thats just too much for the average person to deal with.

[LocNess]

What about being intelligent? Because I am an extremely nice, confident, intelligent guy, and a senior in high school, but all the girls in my high school are dating the idiot drug users who use them. I have been told this only exists because high school girls get swayed to easily by these guys and grow out of it, is that true?

[Deleted]

Sorry but if you're over-weight and have bad acne...don't expect to find anyone unless they themselves are overweight+have bad acne. Thats just too much for the average person to deal with.

Or, get rich as fuck. That always works.

[almalexia]

the first half of your post you said confidence was all that was needed to get the ladies. the second half, you explained how in order to get the ladies, you had to loose a ton of weight and make yourself over. these things do not agree with each other.

also speaking as a female, i can tell you right now that if you are fat and have acne, nothing is gonna happen between us no matter how confident you are that it will. trust me.

[Deleted]

This just reeks of advertising, but still, it's a solid read. The man speaks the truth, regardless of the very varied amount of disagreements that we'll undoubtedly see in this thread.

If I can add to the topic - don't get beat down by rejections, you'll have them and you'll have lots of them. What makes a succesful hook-up is moving on from said rejection and not thinking about it, to the next. Even the most charming guy you know (I'm sure most of you know atleast one) gets rejected on a regular basis. They just don't keep count of that number. And neither should you.

[Deleted]

What about being intelligent? Because I am an extremely nice, confident, intelligent guy, and a senior in high school, but all the girls in my high school are dating the idiot drug users who use them. I have been told this only exists because high school girls get swayed to easily by these guys and grow out of it, is that true?

Some girls like the "douchey" guys, too bad for them. They're the ones that always say "Bad boys are sooo hot herp derp" then they complain about them always falling in love with douches that hurt them. Girls eh?

[Muni]

the first half of your post you said confidence was all that was needed to get the ladies. the second half, you explained how in order to get the ladies, you had to loose a ton of weight and make yourself over. these things do not agree with each other.

also speaking as a female, i can tell you right now that if you are fat and have acne, nothing is gonna happen between us no matter how confident you are that it will. trust me.

And there you go...just like I said it

[Levitt]

the first half of your post you said confidence was all that was needed to get the ladies. the second half, you explained how in order to get the ladies, you had to loose a ton of weight and make yourself over. these things do not agree with each other.

also speaking as a female, i can tell you right now that if you are fat and have acne, nothing is gonna happen between us no matter how confident you are that it will. trust me.

I'd disagree with you to an extent. Confidence is key, and that's all I'm trying to stress. That being said, there are things you can do to make yourself more appealing to the senses which enhances and compliments the new found confidence.

[K1LLLTH3N00B]

If only I had my internet confidence xD

[Levitt]

This just reeks of advertising, but still, it's a solid read. The man speaks the truth, regardless of the very varied amount of disagreements that we'll undoubtedly see in this thread.

If I can add to the topic - don't get beat down by rejections, you'll have them and you'll have lots of them. What makes a succesful hook-up is moving on from said rejection and not thinking about it, to the next. Even the most charming guy you know (I'm sure most of you know atleast one) gets rejected on a regular basis. They just don't keep count of that number. And neither should you.

Very true. Rejection is a natural part of the dating process, and one that every guy will experience at some point in there life. While some experience it more than others, you simply have to dust yourself off and keep going. Ladies won't flock to a pity party, so don't waste your time.

And I apologize if this sounds like an ad piece - just linking what works for me for those who may be interested in doing the same.

[Durandro]

Confidence is important. But a lot of people are shallow.

So knowing where to spend your effort is important too. There's no point wasting a second with a shallow woman or man.

[Deleted]

Hot girls like douchebags. If you can't beat them, join them.

Source: http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/

[mische]

Or, get rich as fuck. That always works.

Not to mention being hung like a horse... And if you have both, like me... and with a bit of brains, damn...

[Deleted]

At least he gives some hints which are not really hints, cuz every scumbag on the planet should know them.

[Levitt]

Confidence is important. But a lot of people are shallow.

So knowing where to spend your effort is important too. There's no point wasting a second with a shallow woman or man.

That was a point I didn't touch on but do have an opinion on. This write-up gives some advice on how to better your game, but I leave the "Who to spit game on" portion up to the reader. I'm not going to tell you what type of girl to go for, but I'll sure as hell help you get her.

Personally, what a woman has to say is often just as interesting as how she looks. That being said, if she doesn't have the looks, I most-likely will never get to experience the things she has to say. The same goes for guys. You may be nice or intelligent, but if you don't have the looks, the woman won't give you a second glance.

[almalexia]

I'd disagree with you to an extent. Confidence is key, and that's all I'm trying to stress. That being said, there are things you can do to make yourself more appealing to the senses which enhances and compliments the new found confidence.

what you aren't saying is that it depends on the girl. if a guy acted confident about me, for example, that would be the fastest way to make me lose interest, since i like shy guys. every girl's different.

[Deleted]

Confidence is important. But a lot of people are shallow.

So knowing where to spend your effort is important too. There's no point wasting a second with a shallow woman or man.

More than true.

It usually only takes me short conversation to realize if a chick is the kind of girl I'd wanna spend some time with or not. Nothing is as unattractive as a shallow girl (or guy, if you swing that way), regardless of how good they may be looking.

I've been with some pretty smoking women that I just couldn't stand talking to more than a few minutes. Good thing alcohol or dancing usually shuts them up.

And on the other hand, I've also been with some girls who may not have been prom queen material, but were much more down to earth and fun to be with.

A solid combination of the two is essentially the definition of a utopian partner.

[K1LLLTH3N00B]

what you aren't saying is that it depends on the girl. if a guy acted confident about me, for example, that would be the fastest way to make me lose interest, since i like shy guys. every girl's different.

send some of that shy-liking my way >_>

[Sylf]

Or, get rich as fuck. That always works.

I'm overweight, I have bad acne, and I'm broke as fuck!

Still I have no problems finding girls at parties/bars.

And Yes I still do have standards..